Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
My husband isn't a slob and in some areas is downright OCD and more vigilant than I am, but there are certain things he does that he doesn't even think about. Like if he opens the mail, he leaves everything out of the envelope and leaves the envelope/contents scattered on the kitchen counter. If he opens a package of food, he leaves the packaging on the counter instead of throwing it in the trash. When he is finished with a plate, he puts it in the sink. It doesn't occur to him to check if the dishwasher is clean or dirty, he just puts his dishes in the sink. If they have dried food on them, he doesn't soak them. If he puts away food, he puts it right in the refrigerator on whatever dish it was served on; no lid, no foil, no covering of any kind.
All those things, to me, are minor things and I just go behind him and throw things away/soak dishes/cover things in the refrigerator. It's not worth a fight.
A bigger problem is that he likes to go to estate sales and buy things to resell, and he brings home the crap he buys. I'm always telling him to quit bringing crap home! He mostly buys vintage/antique stuff the he stores downstairs (I told him if he dies before me I'm giving it all away just to get rid of it) but if he sees something he thinks I need in the kitchen or otherwise he will bring it home. I have everything I need for the kitchen, thank you very much! Other than classic Pyrex primary color mixing bowls or something like that, that I don't already have, I don't need anything. But he will drag home crockpots, casserole dishes complete with carrying case for potlucks, etc. I can't stand clutter in the kitchen or elsewhere, and I don't want my cabinets cluttered with other people's junk!
Once I saw him spill sugar on the counter and then swipe it with his hand off the counter onto the floor. OH NO YOU DIDN'T! That I said something about. I don't know in what world that would be okay! It kind of surprised me that he did that because really other than the estate sale clutter we are pretty much on the same page as far as cleanliness standards in the house. Vehicles are a different story. Mine is always clean; his is not.
Location: In the cold, dark wasteland of eternity...
926 posts, read 674,019 times
Reputation: 1525
Quote:
Originally Posted by luzianne
My husband isn't a slob and in some areas is downright OCD and more vigilant than I am, but there are certain things he does that he doesn't even think about. Like if he opens the mail, he leaves everything out of the envelope and leaves the envelope/contents scattered on the kitchen counter. If he opens a package of food, he leaves the packaging on the counter instead of throwing it in the trash. When he is finished with a plate, he puts it in the sink. It doesn't occur to him to check if the dishwasher is clean or dirty, he just puts his dishes in the sink. If they have dried food on them, he doesn't soak them. If he puts away food, he puts it right in the refrigerator on whatever dish it was served on; no lid, no foil, no covering of any kind.
All those things, to me, are minor things and I just go behind him and throw things away/soak dishes/cover things in the refrigerator. It's not worth a fight.
This sounds similar to what my ex used to do. But because he was sweet in other ways and did a lot of other helpful stuff around our place, I just picked up his mess without saying anything.
Quote:
A bigger problem is that he likes to go to estate sales and buy things to resell, and he brings home the crap he buys. I'm always telling him to quit bringing crap home! He mostly buys vintage/antique stuff the he stores downstairs (I told him if he dies before me I'm giving it all away just to get rid of it) but if he sees something he thinks I need in the kitchen or otherwise he will bring it home. I have everything I need for the kitchen, thank you very much! Other than classic Pyrex primary color mixing bowls or something like that, that I don't already have, I don't need anything. But he will drag home crockpots, casserole dishes complete with carrying case for potlucks, etc. I can't stand clutter in the kitchen or elsewhere, and I don't want my cabinets cluttered with other people's junk!
I also can't stand clutter! I like my kitchen area to be clean and clear as well as the counters, stove and sink areas to be free of clutter, dishes, food items and other messes.
Quote:
Once I saw him spill sugar on the counter and then swipe it with his hand off the counter onto the floor. OH NO YOU DIDN'T! That I said something about. I don't know in what world that would be okay! It kind of surprised me that he did that because really other than the estate sale clutter we are pretty much on the same page as far as cleanliness standards in the house. Vehicles are a different story. Mine is always clean; his is not.
Omg I would be pissed if I saw anyone do that in my house! I would make them clean the sugar up off the floor on-the-spot! And you reacted to it exactly like I would've lol
Status:
"Just livin' day by day"
(set 27 days ago)
Location: USA
3,166 posts, read 3,361,544 times
Reputation: 5382
I would have to wonder about their state of mind that are content living like absolute slobs not caring about keeping their home relatively clean. I'm not saying it has to be completely spotless. There's more to life than spending hours a day cleaning. I do let certain things slide. Noone gonna die if there's a few dishes in the sink or scattered messes here and there around the house. And I don't buy the I've been busy working excuse etc. The house didn't get messy by itself.
Nah, I cannot live with a slob. My mother was one, as well as both of my sisters. My dad and I were the only ones that cleaned house. Although, I learned when I grew up, his standards of clean weren't average. The soap scum on the bathroom fixtures was an inch think. He did use the vacuum, and would vacuum on Saturdays. My mom would do laundry and cook and wash the dishes. But she would let the dirty laundry pile up in the bath tub, or it got tossed down the basement stairs to the w/d. My 2 older sisters basically went to hoarder mode in adulthood.
Me, I learned as a Navy wife what 4K lbs looked like in a household shipment, and I got very proficient at tossing things. Now, I toss things.....even IF, the new husband has a fit. He had 32 years worth of junk he had hauled down here to SC from OH when he relocated here in 1995. I got to go through it in 2012....{{{WEG}}}
Last edited by moxiegal; 06-14-2017 at 04:28 PM..
Reason: typos
I've been pretty lucky that in my last two LTRs, my exes weren't extreme slobs or even very messy. One of my exes would leave his dirty clothes on the floor instead of putting them in the hamper that was only just a few feet away and my other ex wouldn't soak whatever dishes or pots and pans he used and would leave them in the sink or on the counter. Other than that though, these were things about them that I learned to live with since they were generally tidy in all other ways. Since I'm somewhat of a neat freak and like things to be clean, organized and clutter-free, it might be somewhat of a challenge for me in the future to find a guy who is this way also.
One of my friends sometimes complains about how messy her boyfriend is. She tells me that he's a sweet guy, he treats her good, is loving to her, etc. but that he drives her crazy with some of the, what she calls, disgusting and "piggy" things that he does lol. One of the things he does that would horrify me and would possibly be a deal breaker for me is how she says when he clips his toenails, he leaves his nail clippings on the bathroom counter or on the floor instead of just throwing them out in the garbage can. She says it grosses her out every time she has to clean it up because he won't do it; but she does it because she loves everything else about him.
I've also heard and read other "horror" stories about very messy people (men and women) that are even worse than the situations I've outlined here, and that sometimes people end their relationships over it.
Would you ever end your relationship if you had a boyfriend/girlfriend/husband/wife who was very messy or an absolute slob? If everything else about them is okay or even great, would you tolerate and live with their messiness/dirtiness or would you seriously consider breaking up with them over it?
For me personally, it would depend on just how dirty and messy they really were and to what degree they were willing to change that or at least minimize it. If their uncleanliness was really bad and they wouldn't voluntarily make an effort to be neater and cleaner, that could end up being a deal breaker for me.
I'm a neat freak and luckily so is my wife, so yes, it would be deal breaker for me. Cleanliness is next to Godliness in my world.
People make their beds? Lol I think the last time I "made" my bed was, like, 20 years ago.
Wow.....smh
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I would make them clean the sugar up off the floor on-the-spot! And you reacted to it exactly like I would've lol 
and my other ex wouldn't soak whatever dishes or pots and pans he used and would leave them in the sink or on the counter. 
Other than that though, these were things about them that I learned to live with since they were generally tidy in all other ways. Since I'm somewhat of a neat freak and like things to be clean, organized and clutter-free, it might be somewhat of a challenge for me in the future to find a guy who is this way also.
