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As it is your personal choice to be bitter--but don't expect us to not call a spade a spade.
I don't care what you think of my tone. Once again, people who are threatened by others' choices find it comforting to believe that women who don't take the prescribed role of a child-like housewife are "bitter" and "unhappy". So if you want to believe that I'm bitter, believe it. Makes no difference to me, and it doesn't matter anyway, even if it were true: being "bitter" doesn't make me wrong.
Quote:
Originally Posted by TKramar
There is no "privilege" when everyone is entitled to do the same.
Women generally don't analyze whether having too much opportunity makes men unhappy. Nor do men find themselves under pressure to demonstrate that they are happy. Men comment freely on women's happiness and make insinuations about female posters' personal lives and satisfaction purely out of paternalism, which is clearly a sign of privilege.
Quote:
Originally Posted by TKramar
Since I never once addressed this, it is illogical to ascribe something to me I never said.
You clearly don't understand the meaning of logic.
Sure I do. But you haven't shown any. If I have never addressed a point, and you put words in my mouth, then you are guilty of a logical fallacy.
As far as being bitter, not every woman here comes across than way. But there are a few that do. You're one of them. Your posts always come across from a negative point of view.
Perhaps by viewing things in a more positive light, more positive things will happen?
But I do seek one who welcomes the opportunity to be one, and would care for her well-being because I see it as MY responsbility to do so. It's the predefined role I am forced into.
T (TKramar, in case someone posts before me), I am not trying to gang up on you here, and I'm not defending Red because she is more than capable of doing that herself. But I think you brought her ire on yourself, and I see her point. You responded to a comment she had made, and if you go back and look at the series of statements you made to one another, I think you'll see what she is talking about.
Red said this:
Quote:
Originally Posted by Redisca
[/snip]
But of course, to claim that women who have more rights than their grandmothers are -- ha-ha! -- supposedly less happy has yet another dimension of contempt for women: the premise that women are solely after superficial satisfaction, not lofty ideas such as equality, intellectual fulfillment and civic participation, which are, of course, reserved for men. ...
You answered:
Quote:
Originally Posted by TKramar
By the way, except for the "educational fulfillment" part, mainly done as a self study, and not as part of any institution, I have no interest in the second set of things I've bolded--not for my own self. I don't have to be "equal" to other men. I'm content to be WHO I AM already, I'm not into comparing myself to others to see if I match up to them or not. I'm not interested in participating in society either--society can go kiss off.
I've noticed that you are frequently dismissive, or seemingly so, of a lot of things. In the Food forum, when people talk about making nice meals, you say things like, "Eh, who cares, I'm having french fries for dinner." In the Fashion forum, "Eh, who cares, I only wear jeans and I shop at the Salvation Army." Redisca posts that women want to go to college, learn something and help improve society, and your response is, "Eh, who cares, college is lame, and society is stupid." You're proud that you don't have a car and that your job is stocking shelves. If that works for you, that's great, seriously. I am not being sarcastic. If you are happy with your life, and it sounds like you are, terrific. I believe that materialism causes a lot of unhappiness. But your very frequent tearing down of other people's loftier goals makes you sound like you think it's all pointless and we shouldn't even bother. While you are affable enough, I've had that impression of you for a long time, so I wouldn't be surprised if Redisca thinks so too.
Julia, the point is that she ascribes these things to ALL men, when ALL men are not clearly interested in those things. I do not try to make the claim that ALL women do things in a certain way.
As far as the food thread, "What's for dinner?", I never thought it was meant to impart opinions about a dish, but just a report on what you happened to be eating for dinner. Today, I had some of my stew/soup. Tomorrow, it might be a nutty bar. But it isn't a "debate" and I am not givng my personal opinions about it. I don't say "Who cares?"
I'll give you that I'm am often dismissive of the so-called finer things in life--because I live life simply and am contented. As far as whether any of this matters--it probably doesn't in the long run, since we all die.
Perhaps if we lived forever, it would matter, but we're mortals.
Women generally don't analyze whether having too much opportunity makes men unhappy. Nor do men find themselves under pressure to demonstrate that they are happy. Men comment freely on women's happiness and make insinuations about female posters' personal lives and satisfaction purely out of paternalism, which is clearly a sign of privilege.
You could think whatever you wanted of my tone, you could even be right--but I'm not likely to care. I'd just shrug it off, not continue to address what you see as my "feelings". Probably because I don't really have many "feelings".
And isn't a spouse--once you've married them--family, Brauwyn?
That's my point. Family is family; taking care of each other. There is no reason to insert gender. Helpless individuals, and those desiring to rescue, aren't a requirement for the care shared among families.
As an example, you feel it's your role as a man to take care of a woman. It's something forced upon you, according to you, and it's gender based. I also feel it's my place to take care of my husband, but not because he is a man or that it's my duty as a woman to give him an education, put a roof over his head, and food in his belly, but because he is my family. period.
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