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I agree - Randall and Beth used to be my favorite couple and while I still adore Randall, Beth is becoming more unlikeable to me. She needs to be practical now and get back into teaching dance when the kids are a little older. I do understand her frustration to a certain extent because when Randall wants something Randall makes it happen but he worshipped her and not every wife can say that about her husband.
I think people are being really hard on Beth! Why should she have to give up what she wants for Randal to have what he wants?
That’s the entire point of the episode. They both have passion for something entirely different than before. This means significant life changes. Who has to give in? Why does it fall to Beth to give in? Why not Randal?
As a mother of two I have given up so much for my family. You can hit a breaking point where it becomes exhausting and you want to say no more! I want to put myself first, for the first time in years!
I think people are being really hard on Beth! Why should she have to give up what she wants for Randal to have what he wants?
That’s the entire point of the episode. They both have passion for something entirely different than before. This means significant life changes. Who has to give in? Why does it fall to Beth to give in? Why not Randal?
As a mother of two I have given up so much for my family. You can hit a breaking point where it becomes exhausting and you want to say no more! I want to put myself first, for the first time in years!
Well she did support his run for councilman so that should mean supporting his position.
What ideas does she have for financially supporting her dance dream that requires constant sitters??
Perhaps she could work while the kids are in school to pay for the sitters.
I think people are being really hard on Beth! Why should she have to give up what she wants for Randal to have what he wants?
That’s the entire point of the episode. They both have passion for something entirely different than before. This means significant life changes. Who has to give in? Why does it fall to Beth to give in? Why not Randal?
As a mother of two I have given up so much for my family. You can hit a breaking point where it becomes exhausting and you want to say no more! I want to put myself first, for the first time in years!
Quit being a Councilman so she can teach dance? How would they eat?
Well she did support his run for councilman so that should mean supporting his position.
What ideas does she have for financially supporting her dance dream that requires constant sitters??
Perhaps she could work while the kids are in school to pay for the sitters.
It didn’t seem like they really discussed it or explored other ideas. They briefly talked about it in the waiting room that her working wouldn’t cover sitters, then let it go.
Quote:
Originally Posted by jencam
Quit being a Councilman so she can teach dance? How would they eat?
Again, discuss it. This just hit close to home for me because I gave up opportunities when my kids were young. I was the one to make sacrifices to my career. So I feel her frustration. I don’t know what the answer is, but to me it needed to be more of how can we make this work. It was immediately Beth had to wait for her dream.
Don’t get me wrong, I think that’s the right decision in this case. However I fully understand where Beth is coming from.
So annoyed at the writers of the show. Beth and Randall had this great relationship--this great dynamic in which they could even disagree, but then do a content-to-process shift that reminded them (and us) that they were still on the same side. Now the writers are writing Beth like she has a brain tumor or something.
I'm also really annoyed that they have both Beth and Rebecca having a silly mid-life crisis in which they want to pursue a silly "dream." Ooooh, I'm over 40 and I have 3 teenage kids and a wonderful husband, but I want to be a singer! I'm going on tour to sign in front of drunks in dive bars. Ooooh, I'm pushing 40 and have 2 wonderful daughters, one going through a major life adjustment, and we've just adopted a teenager, and now I want to pursue my childhood dream of being a dancer. Please!
I get it that people have dreams and passions, but if they had some dream that was admirable--like going back to grad school to be a therapist to help suicidal people, or training to be an EMT, or to help the needy, or hell, to start a dog rescue, that would be one thing. But something as self-indulgent as singing and dancing? Please, you're a grownup. With responsibilities.
Randall gave up his very lucrative career due to 1) a legitimate psychiatric breakdown and 2) a dream of making a difference to a whole poor community. Beth is giving up her very lucrative career due to 1) wanting to dance and teach other frustrated women to dance. B*tch get a decent architect gig, which you trained for for years, and teach some silly dance classes on the side. Or put off the dancing class "dream" until your husband's term on city council is over.
What a great example you're giving to your three daughters. Got to school, study, excel, spend lots of money on that education, get a wonderful career and a wonderful marriage, then give it all up for something frivolous. But it's really not the Beth character that's bothering me, it's the writers. They are writing her doing things that are completely unbelievable and not fitting with this character they've drawn for the past 2 years. I'm waiting for the actress to step out of character and say to the camera--"What? you have Beth saying what? I'm out of here," kind of like Kevin did on episode one.
I understand what you mean about making her seem like she suddenly has a brain tumor or something, but if you think back to other epis, she always has that wild look in her eye anytime anything doesn't go her way, and this is the first time Randal ever said NO, which has really set her on a course of an epic power struggle to my mind.
She absolutely could not believe her ears when she asked him to drop out of the race and he said no. She has always condescended, belittled, made sarcastic remarks about ALL of his ideas, even when she went along with them.
She criticized everything about the building. When things would go wrong, that weren't his fault, just the nature of the project she was always right there going see? SEE? I TOLD you.
She made fun of him all through the foster process. He always just blows it off, but she's always this way.
All that talk of 'We lift each other up' only applies when he is doing what she wants him to be doing. I think they did lay the foundation for this current situation.
I don’t know what the answer is, but to me it needed to be more of how can we make this work. It was immediately Beth had to wait for her dream.
I do see your point that Randal doesn't seem to listen or care that it's important to her. "let's put our heads together to see how we could make this work" would go a long way for most women, even if there is no way.
The should move to Philly, move into the building Randal bought, and set up a dance studio in the building or the community center for the kids. Problem solved.
I understand what you mean about making her seem like she suddenly has a brain tumor or something, but if you think back to other epis, she always has that wild look in her eye anytime anything doesn't go her way, and this is the first time Randal ever said NO, which has really set her on a course of an epic power struggle to my mind.
She absolutely could not believe her ears when she asked him to drop out of the race and he said no. She has always condescended, belittled, made sarcastic remarks about ALL of his ideas, even when she went along with them.
She criticized everything about the building. When things would go wrong, that weren't his fault, just the nature of the project she was always right there going see? SEE? I TOLD you.
She made fun of him all through the foster process. He always just blows it off, but she's always this way.
All that talk of 'We lift each other up' only applies when he is doing what she wants him to be doing. I think they did lay the foundation for this current situation.
Sorry, can't stand Beth. She's always seemed so cold, and seeing her first date with Randall, he sure has a heart of gold, bc if that was me, I would have ran and never looked back. I love Randall's character and yes he's "over the top", but he does it to make other people happy, to make Beth happy. The nonstop proposing, seems way far fetched and again, she dragged her feet to say yes to that too.
Yeah, I get possibly having your life controlled by your emotionless mother, maybe the warm gene wasn't passed on, but she always seems to drag her feet while saying yes. You are this strong woman, just start saying no. It's too much to have kid brother and bio dad at the house, speak up. Don't go lying and try to stay in a hotel over night. Enough with "giving up your job, or giving up this for your kids." That's what happens when you become a parent. My kids would come first over a pipe dream of being a dance instructor where you might put your family in financial crisis. She should have stood up to big bad momma before entering college and tell HER what her major would be. And if mom wouldn't support it, take out student loans then.
I do see your point that Randal doesn't seem to listen or care that it's important to her. "let's put our heads together to see how we could make this work" would go a long way for most women, even if there is no way.
He did do that. And apparently they had decided to ask Rebecca and Miguel because they did ask but they said no, sorry, we're moving to be close to Kate.
It didn’t seem like they really discussed it or explored other ideas. They briefly talked about it in the waiting room that her working wouldn’t cover sitters, then let it go.
Again, discuss it. This just hit close to home for me because I gave up opportunities when my kids were young. I was the one to make sacrifices to my career. So I feel her frustration. I don’t know what the answer is, but to me it needed to be more of how can we make this work. It was immediately Beth had to wait for her dream.
Don’t get me wrong, I think that’s the right decision in this case. However I fully understand where Beth is coming from.
I understand we all view things from our own lens and how that hits home for you. I'm not seeing where she constantly gave things up like she is acting, though. Randal didn't cause her to not be a good enough dancer when she was young, get laid off decades later, break down in job interviews, fail to secure another job, fail in her efforts to help the campaign, etc., so to me it seems she is taking out all her anger about these things on him.
She didn't sacrifice before. Went back to work after the kids were born. Randal was right there co-parenting. She hasn't had a lifetime of putting her needs and wants on the back burner like she is acting.
'Revisionist History'.
She was yammering about getting the crumbs when she had not sacrificed anything. That seemed just made up in her mind. (Back with the first baby was born). She planned on going right back to work after 3 months. She feared her daughter would forget her and then got mad at the thought, that came from nowhere, that of course Randal wouldn't stay home with her, which wouldn't have even solved the stated fear!
None of that made any sense. !
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