Boston is so polite!

[JViello]

Originally Posted by vanitycase

When I first moved here, I got all these warnings about what a rude town Boston is, and how cliquey and close-knit the society is, and how people will swear at me on the street, etc. I totally expected it to be another New York.

But Boston is perfectly polite.

Everyone remembers their pleases and thank yous, people smile and hold doors open if you're entering behind them, and many times the men address me with "miss" (I'm a twenty-something), which I thought was charming because nobody says "miss" anymore. Just last week I was walking towards South Station and a stranger passing me on Summer Street randomly nodded, smiled and said, "Have a good day, miss."

Now, this could be because the financial district is a nicer part of town and that's why people are pleasant, but I've encountered similar politeness in more "blue collar" areas like Southie.

I will admit that the drivers here are insane lunatics, but Bostonians in general are a hundred times better-mannered than New Yorkers. This city is almost as polite as London.

So where does the "Boston is rude" stereotype come from? Because I don't see it. Did other people come to Boston and feel surprised by the good manners? How does my experience compare to yours?

Go to a Sox game when the Yankees win. Preferably a playoff game.

All jokes aside, as many have noted it's not rude as much as it's a communication style. We get it in CT as well.

For instance. I have a friend I network with who is a contractor originally from the Boston area. If we are having a conversation about the technical details of a project or whatever, he might cut you off and stop you dead with (Insert accent)"Hold on a minute...whatayou mean by X"

Yes, he cut me off, yes he was direct. But was he rude? No. He actually gives a sh*t about what we are talking about and before letting me waste my time talking for 10 minutes asked for clarification. Perfectly fine by me.

Direct speak, and a reserved nature that respects privacy to me is the opposite of rude.

You want rude? Try having your department eliminated 4 months after relocating your life 900 miles away to NC and riding home with Gomer wanting to chat about meaningless crap. Yet I'm the rude one because I can't engage in some fake conversation as thoughts of WTF am I going to do now dancing in my head.

Another example? A NY style diner relocated to Charlotte. I took a "Belle" that I worked with for a real corned beef sandwich. The place was rockin the waitress working hard. She walks over to take our order and little miss two shoes wants to start batting eye lashes and talking about the weather. The hardened waitress' response? "yea yea honey, what can I get ya". I just smiled and gave my order.

"Wow that was rude". My response? "Actually you were the one being rude. You can see she's got a room full of people, she was here quickly to get our orders in and you wanted to talk about the meaningless things with a complete stranger." I don't think she totally got it.

[sunnyandcloudydays]

Originally Posted by Tiger Beer

I grew up in Michigan...I've seen those before. I think it's because between the car-centric cities (except for Chicago) and the cold weather...you just don't see people walking down the street.

When you do see another person walking, they don't know what to do, so up goes the grin. It's a kind of uncomfortable grin, like acknowledging you but don't know what to do, or it's one that precedes a casual meaningless comment, again to acknowledge existance and try to demonstrate friendliness.

Kind of like the automatic nod two grown men do when they see or pass eachother.

[LanceN]

Yes, people in Boston are generally polite. Some of them are not so polite behind the wheel however. Drivers in Boston are among the worst I've seen when it comes to politeness.