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The discharge from your eyes and other symptoms are symptoms of dry eye syndrome.
It's a VERY SIMPLE test which, apparently, your doctor has performed.
If you have a diagnosis of dry eye, you NEED TO BE ON MEDICATION.
Typically Cyclosporin eye drops 2x day.
Alternatively, you can do home diagnosis and ignore your doctor and suffer ulcers or scars on the cornea, and risk permanent damage. Since it can be a progressive condition - it's possible you've already done the damage since you've decided "it's nuts".
Your doctor didn't say your SYMPTOMS are "normal" to live with. Since 15% of the senior population has dry eye syndrome - THAT makes it "normal" but NOT TAKING THE MEDICATION or waiting too long to address it puts you in the abnormal category.
hum.. Well.. your tone and your delivery sucks BUT you know that already.. but I can accept that as I address the points you made ..
eye meds .. oh yeh I am on eye meds BUT they don't help .. enough.. the dry eye is severe and because of the medical program and senior care that I have freely chosen to accept they wont do more than they have .. ::shrugs:: it is what it is ..
for a long time we/dr/caregivers/children/me thought there was a dust/ mold /something problem .. the dry eye didn't go away when I was in a controlled enviorment so the end results are eye drops plus Rx plus an ointment .. Chronic dry eye is a long term deal it doesn't get better and as my other eye issues get worse .. ( that are doctor seen Also ) I was told by the dr that this is normal aging issues .. ..my vision is poor to say the least .. theres much more than just simple dry eye to deal with but yanno I see a Dr and the issues are monitored and delt with .. please be careful who your shaking your finger at Miss BossyPants .. I have been on this eye jounery for the last 65 yrs .. it is progresseve and its not gonna get better .. per my well respected Geriatric Doctor
How did I come to this? WELLLLL.. maybe due to my jobs thru life .. I worked outside jobs in places and then in others inside deal.. I have worn glass's since I was a very young child .. several eye surgeries to correct some of the issues but not all were fixable .. so I adjusted .. so please RWS don't just assume I self digonised .. I am on managed care and its good and it works for most of us that choose it ..
and all the things of aging ARE nutz simply because nobody tells us these things are gonna happen.. t doesn't make me abnormal in my outlook by any means .. I take my meds, I follow orders and sometimes that's just not enough ..
I heard a statistic recently - that 40% of people over the age of 87 experience some form of mild dementia. We put a hospital bed in the middle of the living room last week - a room with an amazing view - removed the clutter but kept the antique stuff. Change from fully independent to fairly dependent happened so fast.
Location: When things get hot they expand. Im not fat. Im hot.
2,515 posts, read 6,325,190 times
Reputation: 5317
Quote:
Originally Posted by KathrynAragon
Wow, I can't believe you read this whole thread from start to finish! I feel for you - LOL.
I agree that choices are stressful to her, but she also hangs onto things tenaciously. So what I think I am going to do - if I can ever go do it, with all my other busy stuff I seem to be continually doing - is go over there when she's at therapy and just take a bunch of stuff out of her closet.
That being said, now that she's taking her meds regularly, she is doing better. Not great, but better, at organizing. And for the first time in years, she seems to be actually BOTHERED by the clutter, and working at cleaning it up. Her place looked a LOT better today and I know she did it because 1) she gave me a bag of clothes, and 2) housekeeping doesn't come around till Monday - so this is a big improvement. It looks better today, after not being cleaned by the staff for nearly a week, than it used to look the day after they cleaned. BIG improvement.
I agree about the cold - my mom keeps her apartment stifling hot and stinky. That's why I can barely stand to stay in there long. I mean, I don't tell her to keep it cooler - it's her place. But I'm not inclined to hang out there because I am literally sweating the whole time.
Hey it was a good read. Boy youve had quite the adventure. Ive had a few adventures too but nothing to compare. My Moms adventure is over. A new one is starting with the Huz.
Glad to hear things are going well. Hopefully you can keep her on her meds.
My Moms house smelled too. Try some regular charcoal. Not the self lighting kind that is treated with lighter fluid. You can buy activated charcoal but the grilling stuff works just as well.
I feel for you. I hate being hot. And I really hate being all sweaty and having to look presentable. I tell ya if I didn't like my old peeps so much I would have quit a long time ago. No matter what the season its like the 7th level of Hell at their house. I try not to complain though because they turn the temperature down for me. I dont even want to know what it was before.
They say as you get older you get colder. I hope so but I'm not counting on it. Mom was hot till the end. Being hot is so inconvenient. At 67 theres only so much you can take off and still be decent.
Lots of good insights in the posts. She might feel 'small' after her stroke and hate to admit to shortcomings as one suggested.
Can you just turn on the air when you go in and turn it back when you leave? We do that at my brother's.
My mom? No way. She is extremely, extremely sensitive to temperature, noise, etc (apparently not to smells though). She would freak out if I turned the air down. And she would notice even if I didn't say anything.
She is very demanding even in the car, restaurants, etc.
My mom? No way. She is extremely, extremely sensitive to temperature, noise, etc (apparently not to smells though). She would freak out if I turned the air down. And she would notice even if I didn't say anything.
She is very demanding even in the car, restaurants, etc.
My brother didn't like it either and we are like 'too bad'. If we're in there, we are getting air!
Location: Finally the house is done and we are in Port St. Lucie!
3,487 posts, read 3,336,268 times
Reputation: 9913
Quote:
Originally Posted by Faworki1947
hum.. Well.. your tone and your delivery sucks BUT you know that already.. but I can accept that as I address the points you made ..
eye meds .. oh yeh I am on eye meds BUT they don't help .. enough.. the dry eye is severe and because of the medical program and senior care that I have freely chosen to accept they wont do more than they have .. ::shrugs:: it is what it is ..
for a long time we/dr/caregivers/children/me thought there was a dust/ mold /something problem .. the dry eye didn't go away when I was in a controlled enviorment so the end results are eye drops plus Rx plus an ointment .. Chronic dry eye is a long term deal it doesn't get better and as my other eye issues get worse .. ( that are doctor seen Also ) I was told by the dr that this is normal aging issues .. ..my vision is poor to say the least .. theres much more than just simple dry eye to deal with but yanno I see a Dr and the issues are monitored and delt with .. please be careful who your shaking your finger at Miss BossyPants .. I have been on this eye jounery for the last 65 yrs .. it is progresseve and its not gonna get better .. per my well respected Geriatric Doctor
How did I come to this? WELLLLL.. maybe due to my jobs thru life .. I worked outside jobs in places and then in others inside deal.. I have worn glass's since I was a very young child .. several eye surgeries to correct some of the issues but not all were fixable .. so I adjusted .. so please RWS don't just assume I self digonised .. I am on managed care and its good and it works for most of us that choose it ..
and all the things of aging ARE nutz simply because nobody tells us these things are gonna happen.. t doesn't make me abnormal in my outlook by any means .. I take my meds, I follow orders and sometimes that's just not enough ..
You Rock!
I wish I knew you in real life. I would totally have a blast with you.
The old home place is sold, the money is in the bank, and I've told both my brothers. Of course my older brother knew the deal and was fine with everything. I was worried about telling my younger brother because he is mentally ill and has been fixated on that place all his life, and always expecting to inherit it. So I was really not looking forward to breaking this news to him - and telling him he has 30 days to get stuff out of there.
But he was fine when I talked to him. He was even pretty positive - by that I mean, supportive of the idea that the place had to be sold. He didn't freak out about belongings. He seemed amenable.
However, he has a history of mulling stuff over and getting more and more crunk about things, so time will tell.
The really hard thing is coordinating everyone's schedules in order to meet him there (three hour drive for us, four hour drive for him, and we have to be there per the court order). My husband works out of state for two weeks out of every month, and he doesn't want to drive up there the minute he gets home or the day or two before he leaves so that really leaves about 9 or 10 days out of that 30 days. And here's the biggest deal - it needs to be a turn around trip, because there is NO WAY I'm sharing a hotel room with my brother and he is not legally supposed to stay by himself anywhere. Plus - He has a long history of piddling. I mean, he is completely inept at actually getting anything done.
This is what I feel like will happen: We'll agree to meet him at the farm. He will plan to get there at 10 am but actually get there at about 3 pm - so we will be waiting on him for hours. Then he would like to wander around and look at everything (understandable but he should have been there at 10 am in order to do that), and then he will wander over to Vehicle #1 of four junked vehicles. He will piddle there, popping the hood, looking around under the vehicle, etc. He will say "All this needs is a battery and tires - oops, too late to go get those, so we'll have to do that tomorrow." BAM. Suddenly we're staying overnight now - which we knew would happen but still...So then he will disappear - who knows where - and come back hours later drunk. He will refuse to go into town to a hotel, insisting instead on sleeping in the barn or in his truck or something ridiculous like that. Which would be against the terms of his leave. Finally we will leave in disgust to go to a hotel around 11 pm, after basically waiting around on him to accomplish NOTHING all day. He will stay up all night God only knows where (against the terms of his leave again) and sleep till about 11 am the next day. Then he'll disappear into town to "buy parts." He will be gone all afternoon. Get back around 6 pm, and start piddling on things. Get nothing accomplished. We'll finally say "HEY. WE HAVE GOT TO LEAVE." Then he'll get mad and start saying that it's my fault he's going to lose everything. Then I'll threaten to call his program director. Then he'll throw his hands up in the air, say he's lost everything, the story of his life, he's totally screwed once again, and he'll take off in the night in the general direction of his house and program. And we'll finally get to drive home and we'd get home about 1 am. And the new owners will end up hauling his vehicles off for scrap, and he'll spend the rest of his life talking about how he has been screwed over and he even lost his very valuable vehicles when the only thing wrong with them was that they needed batteries but no one would give him the time to just go get them and install them.
I can feel every bit of this coming.
The thing is, we could move his vehicles for him. But he's already had everyone else doing every bit of his work for him throughout this entire ordeal. Other people are out time and money moving items for him into storage. He hasn't done a dang thing. It's the classic kid trick - where they make it so difficult to actually get them to do anything, that you just throw your hands in the air and say, "Oh forget it - it's easier just to do it myself."
When all this is over, the less you have to do with that brother, the better.
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