How would you react if your child was gay or lesbian? (woman, gnostic)

[mshipmate]

Originally Posted by Jaymax

It says nothing about homosexuality. It does say something about homosexual rape, homosexual temple prostitution, homosexual pagan ritual sex practices etc....but nothing about homosexuality as an orientation. Just like it talks about heterosexual rape and prostitution.

"...likewise also the men, leaving the natural use of the woman, burned in their lust one toward another; men with men working *that which is unseemly..."

*unseemly #808. aschemosune as-kay-mos-oo'-nay from 809; an indecency; by implication, the *pudenda:--shame, that which is unseemly.

*pudenda The American Heritage College Dictionary: pudendum/ pl. pudenda n. "The human external genital organs, especially of a woman" (p. 1127).


1Co 6:9 Know ye not that the unrighteous shall not inherit the kingdom of God? Be not deceived: neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor abusers of themselves with mankind,


Rom. 1:26 For this cause God gave them up unto vile affections: for even their women did change the natural use into that which is against nature:
27 And likewise also the men, leaving the natural use of the woman, burned in their lust one toward another; men with men working that which is unseemly, and receiving in themselves that recompence of their error which was meet.

9 ¶ Know ye not that the unrighteous shall not inherit the kingdom of God? Be not deceived: neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor abusers of themselves with mankind, (sodomy)
10 Nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners, shall inherit the kingdom of God

"Know ye not that the unrighteous shall not inherit the kingdom of God? Be not deceived: neither fornicators [Gk: paramours], nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate *[Gk: catamites], nor abusers of themselves with mankind [Gk: sodomites] nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners, shall inherit the kingdom of God" (I Cor. 6:9-10).


*–catamite=a boy or youth who is in a sexual relationship with a man.

[DTO Luv]

You Christians should really think about how you would handle this with your children. I'll share my story about me and my mom.

I first told my mom when I was 15. We were in family (christian) counseling at the time and my counselor felt I should share with my mom. I had always been attracted to boys and could tell which it was I preferred at a very young age. You don't think of it as being wrong when you're a kid but then you get older and realize what the word for what you are is. You also see how people like you are treated.

So with my counselors prodding I told my mom. I wish I could take it all back and never tell her. She didn't immediately freak out right there. She was angry but not really saying much. After the counseling office we went to a restaurant and she said the token statements of "it's wrong/it's sin" and also the "you're going to die of AIDS/people will hurt you" spiel.

In the following weeks she became more paranoid since I had told her. She wouldn't let me go out with friends anymore because she didn't know what we were doing now since "anything is possible now" meaning she thought I was certainly doing "something" with my male church friends that were not at all gay like me.

She kept taking me to christian counselors and pastors at the church who had nothing to offer but meaningless prayers and empty threats of going to hell, but the still "loved" me. Yeah right.

The worst part was when my mom pulled me out of school after my freshman year of high school because she was worried that I was being influenced by what she called the evil, liberal public school systems and it was the best thing she could think of to do to keep me from going to hell. So I was denied an education and normal social upbringing of any normal teenager because my mother let her belief in a religion get in the way of accepting her son.

It was a hellish time in my life. I had a friend from school who I told me situation to and she was accepting of what I was going through (she actually started the first GSA in our state) and I asked her if she would pretend to be my girlfriend because it was getting too isolated from people that weren't my family or in the church.

Eventually I told my mom I "got better" and she was fine with it. But in truth I had nothing to get better from, I just had to hide it.

I still wasn't out of the woods yet. I still struggled for many years because I knew no one in my family (all very conservative christians) would accept me. I was awkward socially since I had missed out on being around secular people my age. I tried forcing myself to like girls and would go on dates but I never was comfortable with it. By the time I was 20 and away from home I decided that I would stop trying to be what I wasn't and came out at my job and to my friends. Little shock, they already knew before I told them.

I had found my first boyfriend, who I'm still great friends with to this day, and I felt like I should re-come out to my mother and the rest of my family.

I was 21 when I told my mother again. I didn't tell her how I wanted to tell her but it came up in an argument. We were at my uncle's halloween party (unsaved side of the family) and I was drinking like everyone else. My mom had never seen me drink before and came over to me and started berating me for being "an alcoholic and a crowd-following fool like everyone else". I got mad and told her she didn't know anything about me and that despite her years of criticism that even if she didn't like me that I liked me and I didn't need or care about her love anymore.

She started crying and asked me if there's anything that I could do that would make her not love me anymore. I told her yes and that she wouldn't love me because I was gay.

If you christians take only one part of this take this part. The next day while I was talking to my mother about me being gay she said the most hurtful part about me telling her was that I thought she wouldn't love me anymore. At the time I didn't believe she would love me. I knew what she believed when I was growing up and there was never anything other than vitriol for gays. I felt I was risking losing everything by telling her what I was. That's what every gay person, especially those with potentially unaccepting family members, faces losing. Friends, family, your basic support system. I had to acknowledge that by telling my mother that that could be the last time I saw her or the rest of my family or the last time that any of them would even be kind to me again.

You all would love your kids so if any of them ever came out to you you should know the fear they have and the courage it takes to tell you because we feel it could be the sudden death of a relationship. So please, even if you don't like homosexuality, still like your child.

Now I get along with my mom better than ever. We're very far apart ideologically now but we are part of each other lives and are loving towards each other. She has told me even recently that she doesn't "agree with my choice" but she still loves me. Sometimes that's hard to hear the she will never 100% be ok with me but it's the best I can hope for.

[twin.spin]

I would be deeply hurt. For no parent wants to think that their child would be given over to their evilness, then would probably look back to see how I missed the signs.

[Bluefly]

God bless you, DTO. I hope someday you are able to free yourself of the shackles or religious fundamentalism that cursed your uprbringing.

So many homosexuals endure the same crushing experiences at the hands of those who claim to speak for Christ.

Christian bigotry like the post above is enraging. Absolutely enraging and there is NOTHING Christ-like about it. Christ and his teachings are not divisive or "tough love". They are pure love and extend far beyond the bounds of any book.

Know that your Mother simply did not know any better. She was conditioned to believe the world works a certain way and never did the internal work necessary to break free from her conditioning. I'm glad to see you've managed to still love her and find a deeper spiritual truth for yourself.

"Forgive them, Father, for they know not what they do." applies to those who crucify any of God's children.

[Jackyfrost01]

Originally Posted by mysticaltyger

Jackfrost....consider asking yourself those 2 questions. Why are you heterosexual? Are you really sure you're heterosexual?

You can see we really don't know the answers about the nature of sexual orientation at this point in time. It's the same for gays as it is for straights. The only difference is that quite a few straight people assume 100% of the population is heterosexual...and if someone says they're not, then it's assumed something is "wrong".

Well at least my answer is more civilized than spouting out the Bible verses and saying its EVIL and a Sin. omg that's going too far. I'd rather the kid was gay than some homocidal maniac or rapist. Its really no one's business when it comes down to it. They're informing you is a show a respect and reacting in a negative way is only going to push them away, not stop them from what they want to do. In fact it'll make the person tell you even less as time goes by. You'll lose your child and any hope of a relationship.

So I'd rather be supportive and deal with it myself. I don't have to like it. I can reserve the right to ask those questions just to have my own curiousity sated (not try to talk him out of it really). And continue loving them and hoping they'll still want to confide and be open with me. Its their life, not mine and I'd appreciate they felt enough love and confidence to tell me. I can at least give them as positive a reaction as I can. Hopefully they'd understand how awkward it would be for me. No grandkids, etc. End of the family line (blood-wise). Its a little depressing in a certain aspect.

btw it could only be remotely considered a sin if he was in fact a practicing Christian himself and openly went against known teachings in open defiance. Just because mom and dad made you go to church as a kid and go thru the motions, doesn't automatically make you a Christian. The kids get to decide when they are adults. If they choose not to follow the parents beliefs, thats the parents' problem, not theirs. Its the parents saying they are sinning, not any gods. Now if they openly accepted that faith after they came to an age of understanding (I mean 18, and not a minor whose just forced into it), then its different

[bchris02]

I was having a conversation with my mom the other night and it got into politics and my mom said how God was going to destroy this country by fire and brimstone for tolerating homosexuals. She said that Christians in America should rise up and "take care of this problem" once and for all. That's the kind of hatred I've heard about gays my entire life. My Mom told me when I was 15 that if I was gay I would no longer be their son. Unfortunately I've struggled with same sex attractions my entire life and can never be open about it. I live in a small town in the South and there is virtually no way I could ever be myself and it not get back to people I don't want to know. Because of the national economy I am not sure when if ever Ill be able to get out of here. I am 23 and feel like time is running out. It's cool for people like DTO that have been able to gain freedom and acceptance even after years of mistreatment by loved ones. There is nowhere in the Bible that justifies the kind of hatred conservative Christians have towards homosexuals. It's more of a cultural prejudice and people just use religion to justify it.

[Bluefly]

^
A cultural prejudice is all it is. People create an image of God that reflect themselves so that they can consider themselves righteous in God's eyes.

That's why one of the most prevalent defenses of slavery was Bible quotes. It's not that God supported slavery. It's just that Christians of that time did and they sought quotations to justify it. As we have evolved, the issue has been resolved by progressive individuals, and you never hear Christians defending slavery.

One of the most prevalent defenses of female subjugation has always been the Bible as well - men are the head and women should serve them type stuff. Again, use of that argument has faded as we have progressed, and only the most extreme believers still think men have "domain" over women and such.

So, right now we're in the battle over homosexuality and people are again using the Bible to defend subjugating homosexuals. Not because God opposes homosexuality and more than slavery, but because people need to justify their biases. We are slowly overcoming that, as well.

Through quantum physics and the release of old structures, we are coming to a new understanding of God rooted in unity, peace, and pure love, so I suspect this is the "end times" for an adherence to materialist gods such as those dictated through books. Rather than the rapture, it seems we are just heading toward a new realm of possibilities. Rather than judging homosexuals, we will simply see them as experiencing what they came to this particular life to experience.

So, hold tight. We're getting there.

[Tjukken]

Originally Posted by artsyguy

How will you react as a Christian if your child turned out to be gay or lesbian?

oh u can take out my vote.

i voted buy mistake. dident see that this was only for christians. sorry for my mistake..

[Ivorytickler]

I'm really torn on this one. I believe that homosexuals are born homosexuals but I disapprove of the lifestyle many lead (gay bars, multiple partners, ect, etc, etc, (of course I disagree with this for straight people too)) so I have to say no to embracing the community.

Personally, I wonder why there is a gay community. If it's just a sexual preference, why do they need a separate community? Why segregate themselves? Personally, I'd prefer a community where people keep their sexual preferences, be they S&M, homosexuality, multiple partners, whatever, to themselves.

I love my kids no matter what, however, I can disapprove of the lifestyle they choose to lead and reject that. I would not reject them nor would I reject their partner if they were in a commited relationship. It is not my place to judge that. I would reject a loose lifestyle and refuse to accept a parade of partners being brought home for Thanksgiving but I'd do that if they were straight too.

[Tjukken]

Originally Posted by RobinD69

I am sorry but you really need to read your Bible. Just a few ideas, Marriage is between one man and one woman and any sex outside of marriage is either fornication or adultry, therefore making homosexuality a sin.

what about gay's who are married??