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I need to ask you good people if you feel I am being overly intolerant or judegemental about a situation at work.
I have a co-worker. A female. A lesbian. A proud, self-proclaimed lesbian who makes no qualms, indeed, even flaunts who she is and what her sexual proclivities are. First: she goes by a man's name: Mickey.
She looks and dresses like a man; has hair styled like a man: short, parted on the side. Her girlfriend--who looks equally butch comes by often at closing time and hangs around for 15-20 minutes waiting for Mickey to get off.
So..yeah, yeah, to each their own and live and let live and all that. But here is my question:
Now, Let us for a moment switch the tables. My name is Tim. So..let's say I am a very, very effeminate gay guy. Let's say I dress like a woman; wear make-up and wear my hair in an effeminate style. I go by the name "Tina." I have my equally femme and obviously-gay boyfriend come by work once in awhile. Would this be tolerated in most workplaces, do think? Would I have ever even gotten the job? (I work in a public-contact environment.)
So, if you think the "Tina" thing would not fly, then is it sort of unfair that a "Mickey" is allowed? Is thisnot discriminatory? Unfair? Or should both types be allowed? Again, in a job where the general public is served all day long?
I am of the opinion that Tina would certainly not be allowed at my workplace. He just would not get hired in the first place. Also, I believe this "Mickey but not Tina" dynamic is fairly commonplace. And my opinion is that this is unfair to the male gays.
What say you? And is you agree with the "Mickey but not Tina" thing is goin' on, why do you think it is tolerated more?
Thank you for your thoughtful opinions.
Someone mentioned this to a degree already, but what you are describing in Tim is most likely a transexual/transgendered person.
Transvestism, wear one wears the opposite sex clothing is a different thing entirely. The vast majority of cross-dressers are straight men. Gay men who tend to cross-dress are usually considered Drag Queens and see themselves as performers. They do not want to be women, they enjoy being men.
Why are most lesbians bad at dressing up as a guy? Usually pick the boringest color, tie, shirt combo. Awful shoe selection and why the 50 year old hairdo even though they are only 30??
Gay guys are so much better dressers.
Last edited by vision33r; 02-26-2015 at 06:28 PM..
Why are most lesbians bad at dressing up as a guy? Usually pick the boringest color, tie, shirt combo. Awful shoe selection and why the 50 year old hairdo even though they are only 30??
Gay guys are so much better dressers.
Most? Hard to say. I think what you are assuming is that a badly dressed women dressed in a certain way and with a specific haircut is a lesbian. My guess is that you are discounting all the attractive, well dressed, feminine woman, by assuming incorrectly they are straight.
I need to ask you good people if you feel I am being overly intolerant or judegemental about a situation at work.
I have a co-worker. A female. A lesbian. A proud, self-proclaimed lesbian who makes no qualms, indeed, even flaunts who she is and what her sexual proclivities are. First: she goes by a man's name: Mickey.
She looks and dresses like a man; has hair styled like a man: short, parted on the side. Her girlfriend--who looks equally butch comes by often at closing time and hangs around for 15-20 minutes waiting for Mickey to get off.
So..yeah, yeah, to each their own and live and let live and all that. But here is my question:
Now, Let us for a moment switch the tables. My name is Tim. So..let's say I am a very, very effeminate gay guy. Let's say I dress like a woman; wear make-up and wear my hair in an effeminate style. I go by the name "Tina." I have my equally femme and obviously-gay boyfriend come by work once in awhile. Would this be tolerated in most workplaces, do think? Would I have ever even gotten the job? (I work in a public-contact environment.)
So, if you think the "Tina" thing would not fly, then is it sort of unfair that a "Mickey" is allowed? Is thisnot discriminatory? Unfair? Or should both types be allowed? Again, in a job where the general public is served all day long?
I am of the opinion that Tina would certainly not be allowed at my workplace. He just would not get hired in the first place. Also, I believe this "Mickey but not Tina" dynamic is fairly commonplace. And my opinion is that this is unfair to the male gays.
What say you? And is you agree with the "Mickey but not Tina" thing is goin' on, why do you think it is tolerated more?
Thank you for your thoughtful opinions.
They should both be acceptable options. Mikey may be a lesbian woman, or she may be a straight trans male. You will never know.
^^^^^^^^^^^^ And this is my point! The double standard. Why not acceptable for men in women's clothes?[/i]
Men and their attitudes towards masculinity. Next question.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Der Vogel
^^^^^^^^^^^^
Too: Yes, she is a cross-dresser. Just because it is acceptable does not make it so. She is donning attire normally worn by men, i.e. is crossing over gender-lines insofar as clothing is concerned. Ergo: Cross Dresser.
I need to ask you good people if you feel I am being overly intolerant or judegemental about a situation at work.
I have a co-worker. A female. A lesbian. A proud, self-proclaimed lesbian who makes no qualms, indeed, even flaunts who she is and what her sexual proclivities are. First: she goes by a man's name: Mickey.
She looks and dresses like a man; has hair styled like a man: short, parted on the side. Her girlfriend--who looks equally butch comes by often at closing time and hangs around for 15-20 minutes waiting for Mickey to get off.
So..yeah, yeah, to each their own and live and let live and all that. But here is my question:
Now, Let us for a moment switch the tables. My name is Tim. So..let's say I am a very, very effeminate gay guy. Let's say I dress like a woman; wear make-up and wear my hair in an effeminate style. I go by the name "Tina." I have my equally femme and obviously-gay boyfriend come by work once in awhile. Would this be tolerated in most workplaces, do think? Would I have ever even gotten the job? (I work in a public-contact environment.)
So, if you think the "Tina" thing would not fly, then is it sort of unfair that a "Mickey" is allowed? Is thisnot discriminatory? Unfair? Or should both types be allowed? Again, in a job where the general public is served all day long?
I am of the opinion that Tina would certainly not be allowed at my workplace. He just would not get hired in the first place. Also, I believe this "Mickey but not Tina" dynamic is fairly commonplace. And my opinion is that this is unfair to the male gays.
What say you? And is you agree with the "Mickey but not Tina" thing is goin' on, why do you think it is tolerated more?
Thank you for your thoughtful opinions.
Many potential customers will not like either situation, so the person you describe as "Mickey" would not be a good person to have as the companies face either. Remember businesses cannot afford to alienate customers, so you do not want anyone working for you that interacts with the public/customers who might turn them off.
As strange as this might sound, female homosexuals like Mickey who you described as "butch" might be just as, or even more offense to customers. They can try to overcompensate and act aggressive to maintain a male type of persona.
I remember years ago talking with LE/EMS personnel about a rash vicious female homosexual assaults. They felt that the average guy might have words with someone trying to pick up their woman, maybe even get into a scuffle. Sure some will get into major fights, but not as a rule. But that many female homos get more jealous and will not think twice about breaking a bottle and stabbing/slicing a guy for trying to pick up their woman.
As to the overall situation, I am surprised talk of peoples personal lives are allowed at work to begin with. Sure there might be some water cooler/break discussions, but by and large most good businesses keep that stuff to a minimum. So "Mickey" talking about her sexual proclivities seems inappropriate to begin with.
Many potential customers will not like either situation, so the person you describe as "Mickey" would not be a good person to have as the companies face either. Remember businesses cannot afford to alienate customers, so you do not want anyone working for you that interacts with the public/customers who might turn them off.
As strange as this might sound, female homosexuals like Mickey who you described as "butch" might be just as, or even more offense to customers. They can try to overcompensate and act aggressive to maintain a male type of persona.
I remember years ago talking with LE/EMS personnel about a rash vicious female homosexual assaults. They felt that the average guy might have words with someone trying to pick up their woman, maybe even get into a scuffle. Sure some will get into major fights, but not as a rule. But that many female homos get more jealous and will not think twice about breaking a bottle and stabbing/slicing a guy for trying to pick up their woman.
As to the overall situation, I am surprised talk of peoples personal lives are allowed at work to begin with. Sure there might be some water cooler/break discussions, but by and large most good businesses keep that stuff to a minimum. So "Mickey" talking about her sexual proclivities seems inappropriate to begin with.
you heard? gee I have hear a lot of stuff does not make it true. most women gay or not do not form gangs and go around assaulting men they "think" might steal their women.
the type of behavior you describe is criminal both male and female, straight or gay can be jealous.
I need to ask you good people if you feel I am being overly intolerant or judegemental about a situation at work.
I have a co-worker. A female. A lesbian. A proud, self-proclaimed lesbian who makes no qualms, indeed, even flaunts who she is and what her sexual proclivities are. First: she goes by a man's name: Mickey.
She looks and dresses like a man; has hair styled like a man: short, parted on the side. Her girlfriend--who looks equally butch comes by often at closing time and hangs around for 15-20 minutes waiting for Mickey to get off.
So..yeah, yeah, to each their own and live and let live and all that. But here is my question:
Now, Let us for a moment switch the tables. My name is Tim. So..let's say I am a very, very effeminate gay guy. Let's say I dress like a woman; wear make-up and wear my hair in an effeminate style. I go by the name "Tina." I have my equally femme and obviously-gay boyfriend come by work once in awhile. Would this be tolerated in most workplaces, do think? Would I have ever even gotten the job? (I work in a public-contact environment.)
So, if you think the "Tina" thing would not fly, then is it sort of unfair that a "Mickey" is allowed? Is thisnot discriminatory? Unfair? Or should both types be allowed? Again, in a job where the general public is served all day long?
I am of the opinion that Tina would certainly not be allowed at my workplace. He just would not get hired in the first place. Also, I believe this "Mickey but not Tina" dynamic is fairly commonplace. And my opinion is that this is unfair to the male gays.
What say you? And is you agree with the "Mickey but not Tina" thing is goin' on, why do you think it is tolerated more?
Thank you for your thoughtful opinions.
I think any sexual commentary or innuendo in the workplace is unprofessional and should be reported to your supervisor. So the fact that they are flaunting sex is an issue. Are they grabbing their crotches or something or talking about pricks or wagging tongues?
If you just don't like the way they look then, that is your problem.
There are tons of gay male fems in the workforce. There are tons of straight male fems too.
you heard? gee I have hear a lot of stuff does not make it true. most women gay or not do not form gangs and go around assaulting men they "think" might steal their women.
the type of behavior you describe is criminal both male and female, straight or gay can be jealous.
Thanks captain obvious.
All I was pointing out that LE & EMS felt it was more likely among individual homosexual women, not a gang of them. Presumably they were trying to overcompensate and knew hand to hand they would get hurt. So a busted long neck Bud help to give them a fighting chance.
must be all of those out of control, raging hormones combined with the intense desire to prove how manly they are.....
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most women gay or not do not form gangs and go around assaulting men they "think" might steal their women. 
