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Why smilin.....YOU GO GIRL in your new little Happy Room!! You DO sound a little chipper!! I'm so glad!! I care so much for you and want to see you at peace and maybe, just maybe, find a little happiness in even the smallest little things!!
Snow! I'll bet it was beautiful! Since I lived in Prescott and have been to Chino Valley, I know exactly what it looks like. Hope you didn't have to get out in it! Stay bundled up and warm. How do your little dogs like getting out in it to do their business? Probably like me, quick out and quick back in!!
I want to wish you and all my cyber sisters here a safe, healthy and happy New Year! I pray that each day you will find a little more strength to go on in this new life we have for ourselves. Keep the faith sister, keep us in your heart, and thank you for your friendship.
Your happy room is yours. No person will ever give you the happiness you've found, unless they always have...
Don't judge according to the standards of what "seems" to be normal. Your normal/happiness is what matters.... Enjoy life in whatever form it comes to you...
Go to youtube to watch this, type in: 11 month old twins dancing to Daddy's guitar. Apparently when the twins were in mother's womb, the father played his song to calm them down. it is adorable.
I know there is no time table on grief. In fact, some people do not realize what they are experiencing is grieving until a year later. I only speak for myself but I am so tired of being sad, depressed, lonely, vulnerable and I want to let go of this grief that seems to hold me back to experience life, I want to laugh, I want to have joy, some kind of meaning in my life instead of sadness, but I know I can't fight this monster called, grief, it will leave me when I am ready I suppose.
Location: West of the Catalinas East of the Tortolitas
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Smilin, I know I wrote this somewhere before, but, the Psychologist who wrote "Widow to Widow" (my Bible for the first three years) said in the book that most widows start to turn a corner around six months, but....and I love this....she said, everyone else's six months was her two and a half years. When I realized it took her 2 1/2 years to begin to feel human again, I felt better finally feeling sane, alive, human again at 3 years when it was everyone else's six months. There is no timetable other than your own.
Have a peaceful New Year, and may 2013 bring you serenity and joy... Marcy
Location: West of the Catalinas East of the Tortolitas
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It doesn't snow here too often, but when it does, I absolutely love it!!! I took this from my front door looking at Pusch Ridge in the Catalinas. So used to the mountains of Colorado, that I'll grasp at and try to keep cool/cold weather here as much as I can, because I'll be whining from June to September about the 100 degree plus temperatures....
Last edited by Marcy1210; 01-01-2013 at 01:56 AM..
Reason: more information
I know there is no time table on grief. In fact, some people do not realize what they are experiencing is grieving until a year later. I only speak for myself but I am so tired of being sad, depressed, lonely, vulnerable and I want to let go of this grief that seems to hold me back to experience life, I want to laugh, I want to have joy, some kind of meaning in my life instead of sadness, but I know I can't fight this monster called, grief, it will leave me when I am ready I suppose.
Dear smilinpretty, for what it's worth, by your posts, I can see you slowly coming out of your deep, deep depression. First of all, with any problem, you cannot move forward until you recognize there is a problem. Then, you must be willing to seek help for that problem; you have done both of those. You have turned a big corner.
Like marcy said, there is no time limit to come out of this thing called grief and get on with our lives. So continue to go at your own pace. I think recognizing and admitting that you are tired of being sad and depressed is a big step. I am the same way! I am by nature a happy person, and I too am tired of being sad, depressed and lonely. I realized that when I went to that Christmas party with my friend. I realized that I can still mourn Jim (and probably forever will), but it doesn't mean I have to stop living in the meantime. I know he would not want that; he told me so. I'm sure your husband, who cherished and loved you dearly, would want you to be truly happy again and live life however you choose.
For a while, I felt "guilty" about wanting to be happy; I felt like I should mourn him the rest of my life. But I realized that is not who I am. And not what I want. I want to live and enjoy life. I want to see what unexpected things are out there for me. It's sort of an exciting thought, isn't it? And no, I'm not talking about love or a relationship necessarily, but I'm talking about simple things like travel, going to the movies, going to a play, eating out at a nice restaurant....the sky is the limit.
So give yourself time to grieve, as long as you need....you will know when you have turned the corner. And even then, if you are not truly ready to go on, you can ease back until you are comfortable. I know you will get there; I know we will all get there. Supporting each other is part of the journey, and I am so thankful for this forum and all of you.
I think 2013 is going to be a better year for all of us.
Happy 2013! We made it! Glad to hear everyone had a peaceful night.
Lots of hugs and kisses like I said yesterday. Laughed the whole night away. Even got my hand held all the way home by a gentleman neighbor. It was icy. I had fun watching everyone get drunk and stoned. I only had 3 drinks. I finally met a jello shot I didn't like. Too too much vodka. Yuck. One and done.
I was too wired to go to bed when I got home so I watched Twilight Zone marathon until 9:30 this morning. I've been taking 2 hour naps off and on since then.
Whew, that is all over for another year.
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Probably like me, quick out and quick back in!!
