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I found out yesterday that we will be attending the Jerry Springer edition Thanksgiving.
Hosts: My stepson and his wife. Some of you know from my other rants, They bought a big house that they can't furnish....two years in still only a big leather sectional and a dining table and a big TV. So the only places to sit are on the sectional, or at the dining table.
Guest list: Wife, and she says I'm going, so ME.
Her ex-husband... I get along with him, no big deal. Mandatory invite.
DIL father...he's bearable and a mandatory invite as well.
DIL mother....they don't talk so I don't think she is invited.
I'm sure wife's daughter and his fiance are invited but she works at a restaurant at a casino, so she may have to work.
If my stepdaughter does come, I can see her fiance's mother and sister being invited...fine.
DIL grandmother. Nice lady. Fine...
Hosts couldn't be happy with that. They invited my wife's sister, her husband, and their boys. I've been with my wife for geeze, I think it's 7 years now, and I've only SEEN her sister 3 times. Never have spoken to her. Wife and her sister have been estranged for I think at least 9 years. Sister actually evicted HER OWN MOTHER from a rental property, during February, and put all of their possessions in a dumpster because they couldn't afford to have them moved. They ended up in Florida and have not seen their grandchildren and great grandchild in over 2 years now. Yes, the sister made her mother homeless. They adopted a girl they got tired of and kicked her out at 18, and she is now pregnant with a mixed race child. Two years ago they were invited to something at the stepson's, the sister, boys, and the girl attended, not the husband. Wife and sister did not talk and wife tried to not be in the same room as her sister. The kids spent the day playing on their phones. Did not interact with anybody.
So now instead of a relaxing stress free day, I get to deal with a stressed out wife all day and thick tension in the air.
And her son says to my wife, "we invited aunt Kelli, is that alright?" He knows it's not but what's she going to say after the fact?
Yeah, their house, their party, they can invite whoever they want to invite. But they should know by now to not invite my wife and her sister to the same event, which means his mom gets invited and aunt Kelli does not.
And with the number of people, I need to leave my dog home....
If your wife will be stressed out, and it’s her family, why are you both going? She should say thanks, but we already have plans. Then you can stay home and have a peaceful day.
If you must go, is their house close by? If they say dinner is at 4:00, get there at 3:45. Be polite, and don’t engage in any of the drama. If things get tense, say goodbye and thank you, and leave.
You need to get your wife on board with the plan before you go. Tell her you are not staying if it gets contentious. She can agree to leave with you, or get her own ride home.
On the other hand, perhaps this is an attempt to change the old patterns and bring the family together.
As for me...I would be dreading it if I was hosting, but this year we are visiting my daughter and family, so I’ll just be helping instead of doing all the work.
If your wife will be stressed out, and it’s her family, why are you both going? She should say thanks, but we already have plans. Then you can stay home and have a peaceful day.
If you must go, is their house close by? If they say dinner is at 4:00, get there at 3:45. Be polite, and don’t engage in any of the drama. If things get tense, say goodbye and thank you, and leave.
You need to get your wife on board with the plan before you go. Tell her you are not staying if it gets contentious. She can agree to leave with you, or get her own ride home.
On the other hand, perhaps this is an attempt to change the old patterns and bring the family together.
One hour plus, each way.
I'd rather sit in my duck hunting boat with my dog and drink coffee then pick up some chinese food on the way home. But, I have to go to the dinner. If I go hunt first thing then go to the dinner, I'll be the guy asleep at the end of the couch.
If something turns into a problem, which is high odds, it's on my wife's son. He should know better by now. If my wife wants to reconcile with her sister, which is highly unlikely, my wife will do it on her own terms on her own time. A family holiday dinner is the wrong time and place.
I'd rather sit in my duck hunting boat with my dog and drink coffee then pick up some chinese food on the way home. But, I have to go to the dinner. If I go hunt first thing then go to the dinner, I'll be the guy asleep at the end of the couch.
If something turns into a problem, which is high odds, it's on my wife's son. He should know better by now. If my wife wants to reconcile with her sister, which is highly unlikely, my wife will do it on her own terms on her own time. A family holiday dinner is the wrong time and place.
Bring your own chair, call it your duck blind and watch the show. Agree with wife on an exit strategy if it gets too much. Pick up Chinese on your way home.
Isn't the traditional male Thanksgiving activity drinking beer and watching football on TV?
Or is that going to cause trouble, too?
For me it had most of my life from 15 through mid 40's, been go deer/duck/pheasant hunt in the morning, then eat too much food. Yes, there may have been a few afternoon beers consumed. Not much of a football fan. Stepson's father is in AA, but I'm sure there will be adult beverages in moderation.
I seriously doubt that the TV will be on as the only place to sit and socialize is in front of the TV. And the Patriots don't play on Thanksgiving so nobody will care.
So stay home...that just sounds like disaster waiting to happen.
But be honest with why you’re staying home.. don’t make up some lame excuse. Tell them it’s because they invited people you don’t get along with, they don’t have furniture and they invited a mix raced baby.
All of which is none of your business anyway, so staying home is the best idea.
My small branch of the family opted out of the annual high-drama-bad-food fest this year. We decided to take ourselves to an upscale restaurant and enjoy a good meal. No excuses, no explanations, just "this is what we decided to do." End of chat.
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