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Well I suppose it might be. But it seems to me that there may be some historical basis for it. As I recall the very beginnings of the non native Americans (depending on how far back in history you go) were European settlers who were persecuted for their religion. Their religion happened to be reformist. Their religion was very sexually restrictive. I think there is a decent chance that that has had a profound affect on the social development of this country.
So wait, if Americans are European settlers, wouldn't we stink too?
What is negative stereotyping about that statement?
Puritan roots are much bandied about as a cause for nearly everything -- one would think no one else ever arrived on these shores.
"Young adolescence" would be to middle and early high school. I was using it as a parallel to your equally nebulous "quite a young age".
The word TEEN ager was the word that was being used most often. It seems perfectly reasonable for the beginning of sexual and romantic expression at thirteen.
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Well, yes. That would be the point in not thinking sex is dandy for the local eighth-graders.
Are we equating sexuality and sexual relationships with intercourse? I'm not.
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No? It sure sounded like it here: I have been sexually active from quite a young age. In my experience, the ONLY downside to young sexual activity is the judgement from your parents and other authority figures. Sure I got my feelings hurt a couple of times. That is going to happen in the boy / girl growing up thing. And is not even a bad thing. It serves to teach.
How is this in any way indicating avocation of a rush?
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Assuming for a moment that I think automatically handing a sixteen-year-old the keys is a good idea, which I'm at best ambivalent about, that still leaves out the thirteen-to-fifteen crowd.
I am not sure what your point is. You think that the advancement of time somehow prepares people for more difficult experiences?
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Opinion.
Of course it is opinion. Have I said it was anything but? So too is your opinion. Is that not what we are sharing with each other here?
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More talked about, perhaps. Sex sells magazines, after all. And, once again, there are other ways to learn besides (metaphorically) diving into the deep end. Even Driver's Ed doesn't stick you in rush hour traffic on Route 2 your first day.
Nor did I ever suggest any such parallel for sexual development.
I just plain don't agree with this. Those other "teachers" are merely inputs to experience. You cannot teach someone to walk without the experience of walking. You cannot teach someone to talk without the experience of talking. You cannot teach someone to read without the experience of reading. What you have after conversation is background to apply to your experience. (Except for observation which I would call a limited form of experience.)
You can call things whatever you like, though that does lend semantic difficulties to discussion.
And there are any number of things which can be taught, or learned, without direct firsthand experience. My children's assumptions to the contrary, I have no personal experience with the inception of labor unions in the US, nor do I recall the Big Bang from my childhood.
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No I am not. I am suggesting an other thought based on my experience. What gets your kickers in such a twist? Did I **** you off in another life?
"What? Are we not enjoying the exchange in thoughts?" You certainly gave every indication, at least until you were challenged.
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We will never know. Rather my point.
And my point, to reiterate, was "outside exercises in subjective reality, does observation matter?"
Are we equating sexuality and sexual relationships with intercourse?
Okay.... And while you're redefining words, would you care to define "is"?
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I am not sure what your point is. You think that the advancement of time somehow prepares people for more difficult experiences?
Yes, as a matter of fact, "advancement of time" is one measurement of the likelihood of increased maturity. I will happily except present company, if you like.
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Nor did I ever suggest any such parallel for sexual development.
Oh, now you're just getting tiresome. It's a metaphor.
Okay.... And while you're redefining words, would you care to define "is"?
It actually makes a difference. I am beginning to thing you actually mean INTERCOURSE which is another matter entirely.
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Yes, as a matter of fact, "advancement of time" is one measurement of the likelihood of increased maturity. I will happily except present company, if you like.
I guess we have come to the root of our disagreement. I don't agree with you that the passage of time does much to increase maturity in the absence of experience.
I'd like to ask how you do this. Hands on? Book learning? Lectures? Dirty movies at the Mitchell Bros. Theater in Santa Ana? (SoCal joke.)
In my opinion. Starting from the beginning, you model healthy romantic relationships. From the very young age, you speak nopenly and honestly about sexual matters in an open and honest rather than a scary taboo way. When teachable moments arise, say in the news, about movie stars or regular people, you express your views of what is and what isn't healthy. About life in general, you speak openly and often about character and integrity. About love, caring, friendship.
Then as they begin to be specifically interested themselves, you maintain open communication so that they know they have a resource who will not judge. When their bf or gf is a good person, you trust them. You give them as much information as they want. And allow them the freedom, within the bounds of safety and responsibility, to use it.
Anyway that is what a Mom of some wonderful teenaged girls I know seems to have done. I may be biased simply because that is the polar opposite of what my Mom did.
In my opinion. Starting from the beginning, you model healthy romantic relationships. From the very young age, you speak nopenly and honestly about sexual matters in an open and honest rather than a scary taboo way. When teachable moments arise, say in the news, about movie stars or regular people, you express your views of what is and what isn't healthy. About life in general, you speak openly and often about character and integrity. About love, caring, friendship.
Then as they begin to be specifically interested themselves, you maintain open communication so that they know they have a resource who will not judge.
Pretty much what we did. They knew about sex from a very young age. They also learned about love. And what sex with love meant. As opposed to doing what you want to do because it feels good at the moment.
They also learned what our religion says on the subject and knew we expected certain things from them until they were actual adults and out of the house.
Which meant we didn't exactly encourage them to sleep with their girlfriends. They were also young at the height of the AIDS epidemic. That didn't make me the most "Free Love" mother on the planet. They knew we lost friends and why.
Responsibility and commitment were mentioned. A LOT.
Last edited by DewDropInn; 08-26-2011 at 04:51 PM..
There are good kids, and their are bad kids just as there always was. The thing is today we only here about the bad, because you know, the good, well they don't make the news. Seems so much of the news today, is so focused on the negative, and not the positive.
Our children are a relfection of who we are as parents, but i have got to say, i know some great wonderful bright, smart, funny caring compassionate children, and i know some that are more then a handful.
You have to be parents, to your children, and not a friend, a friend is ok, when you also have morals and principles, and teach your child be setting a good example.
There are more kids today then ever, so naturally we will hear about those who we cannot control. As always there will be great kids and bad kids inspite of the Parents who are parenting them, no different then ever, excpet more troulbe for a child to get in with this generation.
There are good kids, and their are bad kids just as there always was. The thing is today we only here about the bad, because you know, the good, well they don't make the news. Seems so much of the news today, is so focused on the negative, and not the positive.
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