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She really hasn't shown any signs of wanting to run away, no. I don't think she'd be able to either, her whole life she's gotten everything handed to her on a silver platter and to be frank, I think I'm starting to agree with the people saying I need to be stricter and take her to a therapist whether she likes it or not. I think it's the only way. However, I don't know how productive it's going to be. I'll certainly try though.
My husband and I divorced when she was 8, it was a long time ago, she's turning 16 this month. I'm pretty sure that isn't why. He hasn't been in the picture in a very long time. I mean I hope it has nothing to do with changing her name because re-naming my child Spencer Valeria is something I'm never going to get used to. You're telling me it'd be easy for you to call your child something completely different than what you've been used to?
"she's gotten everything handed to her on a silver platter" = overparenting
"be stricter and take her to a therapist whether she likes it or not = overparenting
It was my late mother's name; it's short for Eleanore, which she also hates. I'm sorry but I can't just accept calling her something else after I've called her Ellie for the last 15 years. It'll be tough. Plus I've said multiple times that she can use her middle name which is Jessica but she hates that as well. She just wants to completely change her identity and who she is. I can't just accept that willy nilly.
My son is not a fan of his name and a couple years ago came up with a nickname that I gladly began calling him by. No biggie to me, even though I love his real name. But he just didn't want to go by his real name at the time, and I was fine with that.
Pick your battles - forget arguing over a name. But definitely get her the therapy, even if she doesn't want to go.
Your daughter's problem is not about wanting a name change. She must know that she can legally change it at 18, so there's no reason for her to threaten suicide for something she'll soon be able to do. There's something else going on. No one who is mentally stable threatens to kill themselves over a name change.
Take her to a therapist as soon as possible. I wouldn't take her to a psychiatrist because they'll probably prescribe meds for her, which I don't think is a good idea for children. But a really good child psychologist or therapist should be able to make some headway with her.
Well apparently the OP has not/will not return, so we will never know if we helped in any way.
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