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I guess different women look for different things in men, so I won't judge. In my opinion, not many women I know like men with tattoos and body piercings. ( I don't mind small tattoos, especially the ones military men usually have)
I think a lot of women have codependent issues, they settle for being needed, not loved. Many women like to fix men's problems.
I have a girlfriend who dated a man with drug problems. She couldn't leave him because "Oh, he is so vulnerable and is always in pain." He has nasty bad breath due to the drugs he uses; he is verbally and physically abusive.. what makes him so attractive? I have no ideas.
Seriously? Dude needs a therapist, not a girlfriend.
Yeah it's very odd I see stuff like that a too especially in my part of the country that has the opiate issues. Seems like there's some sort of a weird lack of a happy medium. I've heard guys joke that if they were a druggie they'd be killing it with the opposite sex lol.
In areas such as NYC and SoCal/NoCal they are mostly likely looking for men that are high earners. It's only a man's market because they're restricting their options heavily, so they make the numbers game work against them, not for them. I'm sure there's lots of single attractive guys with good personalities that only make an average amount of money.
Not all women in those cities are looking only for high earners... there are as many average Janes as there are average Joes (in terms of % who are wealthy or not). There are just, literally, a lot more women than men in NYC and the city's industries tend to attract a lot of attractive ones - rich and poor alike.
So you men on here, what are you doing about your problems?
But what are men doing about it? Why arent they doing more?
What areas do you feel men specifically need to draw attention to and what needs to be done?
A man has to know (or learn) what they want at a young age. Most of our formation is done before we are 18 years old.
There are exceptions, but to some degree we each carve out our own realities.
When I was 15 I decided there was no high like the love of a good woman. 50 years later we are still together. When the foundation is set, it's easier to deal with the storms.
Procrastination is one of the worst personality defects. One must have SOME goals and ambition and work toward some of them. If you don't you have programmed yourself for failure from Day One.
Western society helps those that are seen as less capable. This is why there are far more services or opportunities thrown at Women, children, the disabled, The elderly, certain minorities, etc.
Regardless of how much we're told that women are strong and just as capable as men, it simply isn't true. The majority of women are incapable of making it without direct or indirect assistance from men. For some women this means help from the government, for others it means selecting a capable partner. While there are plenty of women that achieve a great deal in this world without ever receiving a helping hand, it's certainly not the norm. Even the women that claim they have never received a helping hand from society rarely understand that the goalpost has been moved closer for them since day 1. They fail to understand that they're not held to the same standard as men are. There is simply far less accountability in western society if you're born with a vagina.
With all that being said, men certainly have their perks in society too. For starters, they're better at almost everything that actually matters because of their biology. For this reason alone, the girly-men on this thread need to sack up and stop crying.
This is just another Right Wing "victim" thread. Just look at the title, the OP feels victimised . Just like most on the extreme right. These are highly "entitled" folk, they are not used to having to compete to get into a school or for a job, thus they lash out and blame "liberals" , "illegals", "establishment", "globalists" etc.
Most of the extremists on the right have made the mistake of thinking that if they can just "defeat" some groups the clock will rewind.
Men continue to dominate the world virtually unchallenged. The only thing that is forgotten is how easy it is being a dude.
Ha precisely. I was unemployed for 6 years out of college and suffered with other things in my personal life as well that I was almost suicidal at one point. Cry me a river man but of course consider the source. They have one of the whiniest men for their leader.
That being said men should not be ignored at times because they have problems too but it's usually problems that women have faced as well so it's a more individual thing with men (I'm talking straight men at least..gays and bisexuals have been oppressed in the sense that there is less acceptance with the men. a woman is okay to be bisexual but men are not so they don't usually come out of the closet). I also think a lot of problems that men have they could prevent. They are often afraid to talk about their problems for fear of being less masculine. This is why I always appreciate the sensitive man. I feel for the men who get truly hurt by nasty women also but again this is not a specifically male issue. That nasty woman most of the time is also being nasty to other women.
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Originally Posted by stockwiz
Go for the shy or awkward men. Just because theyre not good with cold approaching doesn't mean they can't change a car tire, work hard, take care of their household, and provide for their family. Look for the men sitting by themselves and go talk to them. You might be pleasantly surprised. Give the guy who stutters and is nervous a chance instead of brushing him off for the over confident one. You get that way with lots of practice and because these men think and know they are all that, they will be harder to handle, which is a genetic turn on for women at least during the "crush" phase of the relationship, those first 6 months. It can make for big problems long term with his eyes wandering and the like.
Its not easy being male if you want to find a good woman and are not socially well adjusted. Women get a lot of male attention and its a sellers market for them. They can afford to be picky and a princess. However I can try to take a woman's perspective and see how irritating it might be to get unwanted attention from men, not to mention the pressure for sex to get ahead, abuse, etc.
Usually the men I've been interested in were confident granted but they were not social butterflies either. They have been loners/reserved people like me or shy in some ways. That is precisely the problem though. Granted I can't change who I like but partially because we're both not one to initiate the relationship it never happens.
I actually did date a loner guy in high school and he was one of my few actual loves but he broke my heart because he wasn't good at relationships. You would think because we were both loners we would stay an item but nope...
Of course in my case I've been hurt so much in life that it makes me that much more socially inept and I'm neurodivergent to boot but still it's difficult. When you are not a social butterfly you end up settling for a more social person because you have a hard time starting the conversation.
Men like that also tend to become super successful because often the most awkward people tend to be the art type so they are so successful you can no longer reach them.
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Originally Posted by Kevroqs
Yet feminists are the biggest whiners because they whine about how oppressed they are, and how men are rapists. They even whine about men saying just hello to them as harassment.
A lot of men ARE rapists though..not saying women can't rape as well it just doesn't happen as often to a man because the man tends to have the physical build to get out.
Western society helps those that are seen as less capable. This is why there are far more services or opportunities thrown at Women, children, the disabled, The elderly, certain minorities, etc.
Isnt that true for all societies?
Quote:
Regardless of how much we're told that women are strong and just as capable as men, it simply isn't true. The majority of women are incapable of making it without direct or indirect assistance from men. For some women this means help from the government, for others it means selecting a capable partner. While there are plenty of women that achieve a great deal in this world without ever receiving a helping hand, it's certainly not the norm.
Don't as many men seek a capable partner? Is it not beneficial for both men and women to have and maintain a partnership. A stable couple working together can achieve more than a single person alone, male or female. You forget that men also receive direct and indirect assistance from women. Most men do not achieve a great deal with out some helping hand either.
I really think that a partners role as parent/homekeeper is extremely downplayed in connection with helping hand and ability to achieve. How many men could have made it or achieved as single parents? Back in the day if a man found himself widowed his children often went to live with family members or he hurriedly remarried.
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Even the women that claim they have never received a helping hand from society rarely understand that the goalpost has been moved closer for them since day 1. They fail to understand that they're not held to the same standard as men are. There is simply far less accountability in western society if you're born with a vagina.
Your going to have to elaborate on that. How has the goalpost changed? How are they not held to the same standard? How is there less accoutability?
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With all that being said, men certainly have their perks in society too. For starters, they're better at almost everything that actually matters because of their biology. For this reason alone, the girly-men on this thread need to sack up and stop crying.
Can't argue with this. I have 2 daughters and know that women face a whole different range of problems than men do. One of those problems is men themselves. Of all those homeless individuals strung out on drugs what's the ratio between men and women? 2,3,4, 10 to one? Far and away most are male.
A woman with a kid has to worry about whether or not that kid will have a father a lot of the time. Will she have the full burden of raising the child herself? The father may just drop out of the picture. It happened to my daughter. The father fled back to Columbia and has nothing to do with them. She is doing well though, my support is there as is her mother's so while her burden is huge she is not suffering.
Many men need to man up. In fairness women need to do things differently too but that's another thread.
I am curious why so many choose to surrender to men who talk tough and have tattoos and act macho, then are surprised when they find a women who they prefer.
To be fair, from talking to roommates many of the women they have dated have personalities that change from day to day. When that happens, most just call it night and go to another backup on their waiting list.
Especially in today's drama in vogue era, men have so many options if a women appears unstable.
I have had dozens of male roommates over the years and honestly many guys are just programmed to be with different women depending on what they want in a women at that particular time.
Many women should realize that most men don't care if she is having a bad night, yells at him or acts differently. He will likely say he is tired, call it a night and go to another womens home.
Most men have a huge menu to choose from when it comes to women. I have had roommates that with multiple relationships at once and they go to different women's apartments depending on who is working and who isn't.
Here in metro Phoenix most of the people I see at grocery stores, light rain and in public who seem to be on illicit and mind-altering drugs are women. It is rare to see men who look like they are under the influence of mind-altering substances in public.
No, not at all. This is especially true for women. In less developed parts of the world they generally don't go out of their way to level the playing field for women because they're viewed as less capable. The tend to let the game play out on it's own. This is why a woman's role in many of these societies is not much different than it would have been a 1,000 years ago.
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Originally Posted by 2mares
Don't as many men seek a capable partner? Is it not beneficial for both men and women to have and maintain a partnership. A stable couple working together can achieve more than a single person alone, male or female. You forget that men also receive direct and indirect assistance from women. Most men do not achieve a great deal with out some helping hand either.
No, not at all. This is why it's much less common to see a LTR where the woman is as capable as the man. They exist, in large numbers these days, but it's still not the norm. This is because it's in a woman's DNA to not pursue a man that is less capable than her. It's the exact opposite for men. It's in a man's DNA to take care of a woman. If a woman is more capable than a man, the chances of said man pursuing a LTR with said woman aren't good. Occasionally you will get that worthless guy that will sponge of of a girl creating the illusion that she's the more capable of the two, but in these situations the man is still the more capable of the two, he may be playing a different card, but he's still in control.
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Originally Posted by 2mares
Your going to have to elaborate on that. How has the goalpost changed? How are they not held to the same standard? How is there less accountability?
Women are held to a different standard in that the bar is not set as high for them from day 1.
If a guy makes 25K a year, he's a loser. If a woman makes 25k a year it's not a big deal.
If a guy is somewhat good at something like playing guitar or performing magic tricks, he's just some dude with a hobby. Show me a woman of equal talent, and people are blown away!
If a guy invents some new technology or scientific breakthrough, we generally never hear about it unless it's exceptional. If a woman does the same it's in popular science and on CNN.
If a guy remodels a bathroom, he's just some dude that remodeled his own bathroom. If a woman does the same, she a total badazz!
If a guy trips and falls in public, and it doesn't appear to be serious, people will go about their business or even laugh. If a woman does the same, someone will come to her rescue. I could go on all day with this stuff.
As far as accountability goes, I can make similar analogies.
If a guy is playing with fireworks and accidentally blows his fingers off, he's an idiot. A woman does the same, and it's tragic.
If a guy goes out and gets a a woman pregnant on a one night stand, he's a jerk for getting a girl pregnant. If a girl goes out and get's pregnant on a one night stand, some jerk got her pregnant.
If a guy breaks down and has a crying spell at work, he's seen as being mentally unstable. If a woman does the same, it's no big deal.
If man gets drunk and goes home with someone he wouldn't normally sleep with, it's funny. If a woman does the same, it's rape.
ETC....ETC.....ETC....
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Originally Posted by 2mares
Like brute force. Fighting? killing game? war?
No, men are more capable at most things. Women do well in academic environments because they tend to mature faster, and they're generally more responsible than men, but if we're talking adult men and woman 25+, men tend to simply be better at most tasks on average.
Take 10 random men and women with no previous experience in construction and have them build a deck through instructions in a book. The men will dramatically outperform the women
Take 10 random men and women and have them listen to some con-artist motivational speaker. The men will call BS both faster and more often.
Take 10 men and 10 women and have them play a game of Pacman. The men on average will be better.
Take 10 random men and women and strand them on an island. More of those men will figure out how to get off that island.
ETC...ETC....ETC....
This doesn't mean that men don't have their own genetic shortcomings as well. Men are in general, risk takers. This is why men despite being better at most things also excel at self destructive behavior, which is why men start wars, go to prison, destroy their health etc.
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