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Can’t you please admit, just once, that men are often treated unfairly? Would it really kill you?
The way the system works, the guy will always lose, except in the most extreme circumstances when the female is such an atrocious mother, the courts refuse to grant her primary custody. But she has to be really bad for that to happen. If she is just a rotten, lying, cheating disgrace, and totally responsible for the failure of the marriage, she’ll still walk away with not just half of everything, but also hefty child support payments that can literally drive the guy into financial ruin, on top of the broken heart, and loss of his children. Nice.
I personally know a couple guys like that. In fact, my 1st cousin … awesome guy … absolutely one of the best human beings you could ever know … total straight shooter, great husband, devoted father, top notch provider who everyone admires. His wife had a secret. After three kids, and 8 years of marriage, he accidentally discovered this little secret …. his wife’s best friend, was actually her lesbian lover for the entire duration of their marriage, and years before. The moment he caught them together, that’s when it all came out. She coldly and callously informed him that the only reason she married him was to produce the children that her and her long time lesbian lover would eventually raise together, as a couple. That was the plan from the beginning.
And right on cue, she takes the 3 boys, they move in together …. and daddy gets to pay these two scumbags an astronomical amount of child support on his single salary, while they live large on both of their salaries, plus his large monthly contribution. He also had to buy her out for half of the home equity due her, or sell the house. Talk about messed up …. that should be a crime. It was absolute, premeditated fraud, not to mention evil.
Of course, the only way a court will not automatically grant custody to the mother is if it can be proven she is an unfit mother … an unworthy scumbag fraud doesn’t count …. but hopefully, she’ll get exactly what she deserves eventually, if such a punishment is even possible.
As a mom of 3 sons and one married grandson - I’d take that passage from the Bible Gen 27:46. I’m tired if my daughters in law. Paraphrasing Rebekah - Issac’s wife. Yea men - good men can be treated very unfairly.
I am a biracial Black man born in the 70s who is professionally employed, above average looking, masculine and athletic. Also, I look 15+ years younger. I have no luck with women that are younger than their late 30s. Most women I've dated were a little older than me.
Yet, I don’t date -no longer interested at 69, but my buddies or friends are much much younger than I. For parties and going out places - they request I join them. Go figure.
I am a biracial Black man born in the 70s who is professionally employed, above average looking, masculine and athletic. Also, I look 15+ years younger. I have no luck with women that are younger than their late 30s. Most women I've dated were a little older than me.
Why would you expect a woman who is young enough to be your daughter would want to date you? A 20-something who wanted to date you would be someone with daddy issues.
I have not seen what you folks are seeing. I just went to a friends baby shower two weeks ago . Last week I went to a graduation party , and most everyone were male/female couples . They were young 18-30 , heterosexual , happy having tons of fun. dancing , eating, laughing, normal people. Oh yes and plenty of middle aged and old folks too.
Maybe you are in a slump , or maybe you believe everything you read. But I think it is a bunch of BS. (what you are saying that men don't have a normal life.) Or maybe you are just on the computer so much you never go anywhere or do anything , and if you are always on your couch , i can promise you , you will not meet anyone , or get any invitations. If you really believe what you are writing here and you are talking heterosexual relationships , and if your not just talking to hear yourself talk , meaning , you feel you are suffering from what you think is happening, STOP . Get away from your computer now and get back into life! Nobody is going to find you inside your house. OK NOW forget all of that stuff you wrote in your post , because it is not true , heterosexual people are believe it or not having sex right now !! People are making babies right now , men and women are having tons of fun together right now . Believe it , and get out their and stop spewing your BS because nobody will want you then . OH AND YES the media is pushing sex confusion , same sex sex , ignore it people will be themselves
Yes I stated facts that single mothers are the largest demographic of those in poverty, including divorced women and especially those who were SAHMs with no marketable skills because they have been out of the job market.
Wow you just solved poverty, women should never get married or have kids unless they have PhD in rocket science. There's no such thing as a rich divorced woman in your world.
Breaking news, a single parent family will generally always make less than a married family. It doesn't matter what job she or he has.
Not every person is going to be a doctor, lawyer, and CEO. The notion that stay at home parents are too "stupid" to get child support, alimony, life insurance, or a division of assets, in the case of a divorce or death of a spouse, is an insult to all of them. Ofcourse a single parent won't be able to afford the mortgage on a family home after a divorce to their CEO spouse, that's where the judge comes in to decide who gets what.
Dr Dres ex wife was still awarded $100 million after the divorce, yet she was a lawyer, and their kids are fully grown. Please enlighten us again on how stay at home parents are "lazy and stupid."
Quote:
Under the terms of the settlement, Young will get $50 million immediately and the other $50 million in one year, the sources said
One reason folks get married, is the legal financial protections that come with a divorce via a judge. I don't see the ex-wife of Jeff Bezos or Bill Gates in the poor house. What are their marketable skills again? Did they go back to working full time after their divorce? No. All they did was marry someone with money, then divorce them.
So before you paint every stay at home parent as stupid and lazy or "one divorce away from the poor house." Please educate yourself on the reality of the situation: whether that be the division of assets, alimony, child support, spousal support, life insurance, property, investments, etc. that are more than enough to ensure a stay at home parent is protected. Not everyone marries broke people.
I can go to Eastern Europe and get me a mail order bride who doesn't even know English, marry her, then divorce her the next day and I will still be obligated to provide her spousal support for a decade via Alien Fiance Visa laws.
I am astounded that this thread is 84 pages long with a topic of men that have hit 30, and suddenly realize that time is passing them by, and I'm guessing many of the guys from their high school class have already settled down, and many of the women that are still unattached don't meet their expectations for sex and companionship, many probably women divorced or broken up from a long term relationship, have had enough of putting up with a man to last a lifetime!
I would discourage people from marrying. I think if marriage is "on the table", there should be a 5-year renewable contract, not an attempt to bond people for the rest of their life. Funny thing is there is another thread here with men harping about how unfair life is to them when the marriage fails, and the woman keeps the kids and get over with child support payments, which even when court ordered often don't show up.
So, men are just unhappy that they don't have a woman that is in the kitchen barefoot and pregnant, and ready to provide sex and companionship on demand.
Marriage is becoming outdated. Times change, and you either change with them or..............
Nah, if a guy has cute looks and sweet charm, why not get married to a likewise beautiful and charming woman? Two heads are usually better than one in a household. Guys that aren't married by age 30 quite likely just don't charm women. If they're gay or bisexual, they don't charm men either. I suspect a good number of such men are able to find hobbies to preoccupy much of their time. Also finding good paying, satisfying careers can help them a lot. Ever heard of being married to your job?
One reason folks get married, is the legal financial protections that come with a divorce via a judge. I don't see the ex-wife of Jeff Bezos or Bill Gates in the poor house. What are their marketable skills again? Did they go back to working full time after their divorce? No. All they did was marry someone with money, then divorce them.
Bezos' wife is a bad example. She helped build that business back when it was in their garage. I thought he got off easy when she agreed to walk away with only 30 Billion, much of which she has been giving away to charity.
I agree that divorce far too often, unfairly favors the woman. But if you want people to take these claims seriously, you have to call it from an unbiased position in all cases.
Bezos' wife is a bad example. She helped build that business back when it was in their garage. I thought he got off easy when she agreed to walk away with only 30 Billion, much of which she has been giving away to charity.
I agree that divorce far too often, unfairly favors the woman. But if you want people to take these claims seriously, you have to call it from an unbiased position in all cases.
You've missed the entire point.
2mares is arguing that stay at home parents are at "risk" of being "in the poorhouse" after a divorce or spousal death because "they have no skills."
I've named countless examples of why that isn't true. If a burger flipper marries a billionaire, it's not the burger flipper who is taking a risk.
I couldn't care less who gets what in a divorce, I'm pointing out that stay at home parents are far from being at risk of being in the poor house, so long as they didn't marry someone who was broke.
People didn't advertise it back then. It was shameful to be born out of wedlock. Such a child would not have told you.
If you knew any adopted kids back then, chances are some of them came from unmarried mothers who gave them up.
I should have said knowingly knew anyone (which is what I meant), rather than met, One could be introduced to someone and then never see them again and then, of course you wouldn’t know their background.
I grew up in a very affluent, what some outsiders felt was a pretty snooty, community of single family non rented (except for one…..and everyone knew it) homes (when I was in high school, after playing tennis and still in our tennis clothes, we drove to a pizza place in another town. When we walked in, we overheard someone say “these kids must be from _______ “ (the name of my town)). After elementary school, my best friends were a group of kids who came over from a private school that had closed. Those parents tightly controlled who their sons associated with, and I was let into that group because one of the dads had been friends with my dad in prep school, and the mother of another had been a student at their sister school and had been the head of my dad’s fan club (not kidding…my dad was a prominent varsity athlete, and he had a fan club at the all girls sister school. It wasn’t my dad who told me about that….that mother did, and I neglected to ask her if the administration knew about the fan club). My social group in college was in the Greek system (fraternities and sororities), and you had to fill out detailed information during rush (people knew each other’s business). I had a leadership position in my fraternity, and was entrusted with personal information of everyone in the Greek system at my ‘public ivy’. I know the backgrounds of my friends in Europe. I knew the backgrounds of everyone in my work environment in my 20s, and it was in that environment, when I was 28, that I met someone who was born to parents who weren’t married.
There were a few adoptions in my town, but they were all either a step parent adopting the spouse’s (who had been previously married) bio kids, or unusual situations….in one family the parents of one boy and one girl died together in a car accident and their friends (a married couple) adopted that brother and sister.
You’re right about the out of wedlock stigma, and it still exists in some social groups. If one examines higher rungs on the social ladder, that stigma can expand……not going to the right schools, not being raised in the right area, not being members of the right clubs, etc.
Wow you just solved poverty, women should never get married or have kids unless they have PhD in rocket science. There's no such thing as a rich divorced woman in your world.
Breaking news, a single parent family will generally always make less than a married family. It doesn't matter what job she or he has.
Not every person is going to be a doctor, lawyer, and CEO. The notion that stay at home parents are too "stupid" to get child support, alimony, life insurance, or a division of assets, in the case of a divorce or death of a spouse, is an insult to all of them. Ofcourse a single parent won't be able to afford the mortgage on a family home after a divorce to their CEO spouse, that's where the judge comes in to decide who gets what.
Dr Dres ex wife was still awarded $100 million after the divorce, yet she was a lawyer, and their kids are fully grown. Please enlighten us again on how stay at home parents are "lazy and stupid."
One reason folks get married, is the legal financial protections that come with a divorce via a judge. I don't see the ex-wife of Jeff Bezos or Bill Gates in the poor house. What are their marketable skills again? Did they go back to working full time after their divorce? No. All they did was marry someone with money, then divorce them.
So before you paint every stay at home parent as stupid and lazy or "one divorce away from the poor house." Please educate yourself on the reality of the situation: whether that be the division of assets, alimony, child support, spousal support, life insurance, property, investments, etc. that are more than enough to ensure a stay at home parent is protected. Not everyone marries broke people.
I can go to Eastern Europe and get me a mail order bride who doesn't even know English, marry her, then divorce her the next day and I will still be obligated to provide her spousal support for a decade via Alien Fiance Visa laws.
Melinda Gates has an MBA from Duke, and was a well placed employee at Microsoft before marrying Bill.
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