Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Has anyone else noticed this? Sometimes (infrequently) when I happen to be talking to someone they tend to bring up having Asperger syndrome. They may say this is the reason for their impaired social interaction - including hostility. Is hostility a symptom of AS?
I know there are many with this disorder who do not share this problem. I wonder if it being used as an excuse for displaying this behavior. Yes, it's difficult to overcome the social difficulties from this disorder, but if they are constantly telling themselves it's alright because they have AS and not try to improve it, they may see their behavior as acceptable. Others are often unwilling to point out the behavior because they know they have the disorder and fear offending them.
I even see this in people who display no symptoms. Since AS tends to be overdiagnosed, more people have antisocial behavior because they think it's excusable.
Truer words were never spoken. People wear that AS diagnosis as a badge of honor nowadays. And I've read of many people on these threads and IRL who simply self diagnose; they haven't even been diagnosed by a professional. I'm not saying I think it isn't real. Perhaps it is. But I suspect many people diagnosed as "Aspie" (puke) are just shy or introverted. OP, what exactly do you mean when referring to others as "antisocial?" Are you talking about people who display sociopathic tendencies or people who are introverted and prefer being alone?
I don't think people who really have Asperger's (if it exists and is not a mild form of autism) typically display hostility. I recall reading a thread a month or two ago in which the mother of her college student with Asperger's was discussing how he got drunk all the time, was always late and absent to his classes and family gatherings, and was rude and hostile. I told her (and other posters did as well) I doubted the kid had Asperger's and he sounded like he needed to see another mental health professional for a second evaluation.
OP, what exactly do you mean when referring to others as "antisocial?" Are you talking about people who display sociopathic tendencies or people who are introverted and prefer being alone?
I'm not talking about being introverted; that deserves no diagnosis. When I say antisocial, I am referring to any behavior that is is harmful to another - aggression, hostility, excessive anger, etc. More like the sociopathic tendencies you mentioned, though perhaps not as extreme as that.
Has anyone else noticed this? Sometimes (infrequently) when I happen to be talking to someone they tend to bring up having Asperger syndrome. They may say this is the reason for their impaired social interaction - including hostility. Is hostility a symptom of AS?
I know there are many with this disorder who do not share this problem. I wonder if it being used as an excuse for displaying this behavior. Yes, it's difficult to overcome the social difficulties from this disorder, but if they are constantly telling themselves it's alright because they have AS and not try to improve it, they may see their behavior as acceptable. Others are often unwilling to point out the behavior because they know they have the disorder and fear offending them.
I even see this in people who display no symptoms. Since AS tends to be overdiagnosed, more people have antisocial behavior because they think it's excusable.
Yeah, it's like all those people getting short of breath an using COPD as an excuse, when they're just lazy.
I'm not talking about being introverted; that deserves no diagnosis. When I say antisocial, I am referring to any behavior that is is harmful to another - aggression, hostility, excessive anger, etc. More like the sociopathic tendencies you mentioned, though perhaps not as extreme as that.
Those are not typical traits for Aspergers. Sheldon Cooper from Big Bang is Aspergers (IMO and the opinion of many, although never addressed on the show) that is typical Aspie behavior, of course not all have the brilliance he has (however many do)
Of course I'm sure there are many people with mixed diagnoses, on the spectrum but also suffering from bipolar disease too, etc. Maybe the people you know who show aggression are people with multiple mental disorders
Has anyone else noticed this? Sometimes (infrequently) when I happen to be talking to someone they tend to bring up having Asperger syndrome. They may say this is the reason for their impaired social interaction - including hostility. Is hostility a symptom of AS?
I know there are many with this disorder who do not share this problem. I wonder if it being used as an excuse for displaying this behavior. Yes, it's difficult to overcome the social difficulties from this disorder, but if they are constantly telling themselves it's alright because they have AS and not try to improve it, they may see their behavior as acceptable. Others are often unwilling to point out the behavior because they know they have the disorder and fear offending them.
I even see this in people who display no symptoms. Since AS tends to be overdiagnosed, more people have antisocial behavior because they think it's excusable.
I would say that I have seen some people with Asperger's be hostile but I have also seen plenty of people who do not have Asperger's behave in a hostile manner. They may feel the need to tell you that they have Aspberger's because you are not picking up on their social cues. We are always saying it is they who need to pick up on ours. Let's say for example you are constantly making jokes and your friend isn't laughing (assuming the jokes are actually funny). It doesn't mean that they are being a grouch or that they don't want to socialize...it can mean that they simply do not understand why the joke is funny. Many people who have Asperger's tend to take things literally and so have trouble understanding things like that.
I think it's important to understand the person and then try to make things work between the two of you. Both sides have to want to understand each other. A lot of questions will be asked but a lot of learning can come from it.
I would say that I have seen some people with Asperger's be hostile but I have also seen plenty of people who do not have Asperger's behave in a hostile manner. They may feel the need to tell you that they have Aspberger's because you are not picking up on their social cues. We are always saying it is they who need to pick up on ours. Let's say for example you are constantly making jokes and your friend isn't laughing (assuming the jokes are actually funny). It doesn't mean that they are being a grouch or that they don't want to socialize...it can mean that they simply do not understand why the joke is funny. Many people who have Asperger's tend to take things literally and so have trouble understanding things like that.
I think it's important to understand the person and then try to make things work between the two of you. Both sides have to want to understand each other. A lot of questions will be asked but a lot of learning can come from it.
I'm not trying to be an idiot here, it's an honest question. Once someone is diagnosed with Asperger's and becomes aware that not everyone takes everything literally as they do, and becomes aware that there are such things as shades of truth and nuances, can they LEARN not to take everything literally? Can't they LEARN to look for the social cues that other people pick up without having to be taught the skill?
I'm not trying to be an idiot here, it's an honest question. Once someone is diagnosed with Asperger's and becomes aware that not everyone takes everything literally as they do, and becomes aware that there are such things as shades of truth and nuances, can they LEARN not to take everything literally? Can't they LEARN to look for the social cues that other people pick up without having to be taught the skill?
It's hard to say because I myself don't have Asperger's. As for taking things literally, I feel as if it would have to be a learning opportunity each time a given situation is presented. What I'm trying to say is that let's say you are being sarcastic about something and their reaction isn't what you expect, you may need to take that time to explain the meaning of what you said. You may need to do that often. I don't think that not taking things literally is something so easily generalized for some people who have Asperger's. It's just the way their brain is wired.
As for your second question, it relates to the first. They would have to make mental notes for each situation and apply them as best possible, to future situations. I do know that many clinics/schools that specialize in teaching children with autism/Asperger's have programs to help them take notice of social cues and appropriate ways of responding to social cues. Of course, social cues aren't easy things to teach/learn in school because these are things we learn better in the outside world.
Also, people have to want to learn. If your friend doesn't want to make the attempt to communicate, to learn, then there is nothing you can do about that. Your friend told you they have Asperger's. The one I'm thinking of didn't tell me and many times tried to make me seem like such a horrible person. I feel that there should have been a lot more communication but it wasn't something that I knew about at the time. In this case, he didn't learn as much as he could have learned and I didn't either because I feel it was easier for him to be alone than to fight to learn so that he could socialize in society.
I'm not trying to be an idiot here, it's an honest question. Once someone is diagnosed with Asperger's and becomes aware that not everyone takes everything literally as they do, and becomes aware that there are such things as shades of truth and nuances, can they LEARN not to take everything literally? Can't they LEARN to look for the social cues that other people pick up without having to be taught the skill?
No. It's like trying to make a color blind person understand colors by explaining it to them. More realistic is compensation, teach the person to label their locks so they match. Social skills can be improved with coaching and help as well, usually it is from speech therapists. In children, they work a lot on recognizing expressions, for instance "show me which picture is the sad person". It's never going to extend to nuances though, no matter the training.
Has anyone else noticed this? Sometimes (infrequently) when I happen to be talking to someone they tend to bring up having Asperger syndrome. They may say this is the reason for their impaired social interaction - including hostility. Is hostility a symptom of AS? I have it, but I only become hostile when someone threatens me, or insults me badly, I take it much worse than most, but I'm not a lunatic!
I know there are many with this disorder who do not share this problem. I wonder if it being used as an excuse for displaying this behavior. Yes, it's difficult to overcome the social difficulties from this disorder, but if they are constantly telling themselves it's alright because they have AS and not try to improve it, they may see their behavior as acceptable. My mantra is "don't be yourself" I do try to improve, mainly because I get small nervous breakdowns when I mess up badly in social-situations :/
Others are often unwilling to point out the behavior because they know they have the disorder and fear offending them. Haha, not where I live! They insult anyone who is a bit off, and has trouble hiding it.
I even see this in people who display no symptoms. Since AS tends to be overdiagnosed, more people have antisocial behavior because they think it's excusable. Some people say I don't, after enough time some become good at hiding it, only half the people I tell believe me, but when I was younger they all did!
I read your last sentence again. Yes, such a thing is possible. Usually if they say/do something and such and such is the consequence they often receive and it's one they don't like, that may prevent them from doing it again in the future. For example, let's say your friend makes the same joke every day. It's gotten to the point you have had to tell your friend that it isn't funny to you anymore because you already know the joke. You then start ignoring your friend totally whenever the joke is said. Your friend will most likely get the point that they need to stop telling this joke or they will be ignored as a consequence.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
