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I’ve only seen the media release the suspect’s name, not law enforcement. So I’m not sure there’s an inconsistency with the other recent case of a minor’s arrest.
Agreeing with others that it’s tough to find help for teens. Tough to find a provider, can be tough to get kid to cooperate with treatment. Sometimes tough to afford treatment. These problems predated Covid. We don’t know if these parents got help for him. It’s not a miracle treatment. Also, we don’t know if they provided access to unsecured weapons. I’m curious.
It is hard to find help and it's hard to find the right fit. But I can tell you if you call someplace and say my kid is in crisis mode and his/her doctor says they need immediate help you will get seen.
is it hard to "make" your kid go? Yeah it is. Again it comes down to who is in charge and what kind of consequences one is willing to impose if it comes to that. However, there is also power in bargaining. It is difficult, not impossible or anywhere near it to make a 15 year old go to therapy. And if you suspect your child is on the verge of a murderous rampage, or even halfway there, there are options there too.
It is hard to find help and it's hard to find the right fit. But I can tell you if you call someplace and say my kid is in crisis mode and his/her doctor says they need immediate help you will get seen.
is it hard to "make" your kid go? Yeah it is. Again it comes down to who is in charge and what kind of consequences one is willing to impose if it comes to that. However, there is also power in bargaining. It is difficult, not impossible or anywhere near it to make a 15 year old go to therapy. And if you suspect your child is on the verge of a murderous rampage, or even halfway there, there are options there too.
You can make them go. How do you make them cooperate once there?
The options are slim and poor. I’ve been in the position of calling the police about very troubled kid. It didn’t get the kid help. Just a screening and then release.
Could be sibling issues at that age, parents may not have thought much if it. These kids grow up with violent movies, videos, games, etc. Fantasy becomes reality. Should we really be surprised, this is happening way to often now with young boys. A tragedy all the way around.
These kids grow up with violent movies, videos, games, etc.
Most industrialized countries have the same movies, video games, and games that we do. What they do not have is easy access to guns, which outnumber people in the US.
Last edited by JackieRTP; 10-14-2022 at 09:40 PM..
Years ago I used to work at a school for severely emotionally disturbed youth. School had almost as much security as it did students. A lot of the teaching was one on one. I don’t think the average person understands how mentally disturbed some juvenile can be. And then you stick a gun in their hands? Forget about it. I watched a student asked to borrow my pen. An innocent question? He very calmly asked me, once the pen was in his hand he proceeded to stab it right through his own left hand two times before security could jump on him. Completely through the bone and everything. Mental illness is a real thing, too many people try to simply just pretend it doesn’t exist and these these kids shoved back out there into society with no tools to navigate themselves.
I never murdered anyone, but I can assure you that no matter how much up your backside some parents are, because they were - about everything!, they still don't know a whole lot about you.
Some people have good relationships with their parents, some have bad ones, and some have neutral ones where they neither avoid them as much as possible or hang on to them every moment and tell them everything.
There's a whole lot my parents still do not know about me. They have no idea to this day that when I was 14, and we went on vacation to DC and FL, that while in FL at Walt Disney World, I was seconds from being abducted by some blonde man. I had noticed him watching me when I was on the 'ride' where you got to drive little race cars. He then followed me when I left the ride. He kept following me, was gaining on me, so I ran to Space Mountain. I was the last in line, that of course extended outside, and he was dead set on continuing even with the people in line in front of me. He was about 20 feet away when a family got in line behind me. Never felt so relieved in my life. He stopped. Stared at me for...20 seconds..a long time...and then walked away. They don't know that.
It caused me a whole lot of stress for a long time, and they had no idea why I was so stressed and acting out. They asked me, they sat me down, they made me go to a counselor...guess what? You cannot make a kid tell you anything, nor a counselor. I didn't tell a single person until I had been an adult for over a decade.
You can be the most hovering parents on the planet. You can think that you are successfully monitoring everything they are doing. You can think that your kid knows they can come to you and tell you anything. I guarantee that if I told my mom, she would have had the whole park shut down to find that nasty blonde man. She was that way when anyone tried to mess with me.
But I didn't tell her.
We can't just assume that all parents are being derelict. Sometimes, kids don't tell their parents things - and sometimes the kids have no idea why.
I agree with what you are saying however we as parents (even the helicopter one's like I kind of was) have to realize that our children will never tell us everything. That is why parents have to really be present in their children's lives so that they can "see" / "feel" the signs that something is not right and then actually intervene and get the help their child needs.
Time after time, when these horrific situations happen, we find out that there were signs that the parents saw. And yet these same parents still allowed their children to have weapons (or have easy access to them). So that really was my point. I really think that most of these parents did see signs and if they did why in the world would you buy a gun for your child (like in the Highland Park shooter case) or even have any guns in your home if your child is exhibiting signs of mental illness. It just doesn't make sense to me.
Again, like I stated earlier, we don't have any details yet in this case so I am not saying that this is the case here but these types of cases do tend to have a lot similarities. We will just have to wait and see what they find out during this investigation.
"I can calculate the motion of the heavenly bodies, but never the madness of men".
-Sir Isaac Newton
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