Anyone married to someone who had a massive weight gain? (guy, attractiveness)
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I smoked for almost 20 years. I always told myself I'd quit but never did. One day I decided I wanted to quit and I did. If you want to lose weight, you will. If you want to quit smoking, you will. If you want to quit drinking, you will.
If you really want something to happen bad enough, it will. Doesn't matter if you're married or single, male or female.
Others can rag on you all day long and that's not gonna work. Until you really want something bad enough for yourself, no meetings, no diets, no nothing is gonna work.
I am not married and never have been, but I would not leave someone for a weight gain. If I loved them enough to marry him, I would love him even if he gained a tremendous amount of weight. Hopefully, we could work together to make sure he was healthy. To me that would be what mattered, not how big he was but that he would live to grow old with me.
Nope. Not buying what you're selling. You just don't want to answer the questions. I'll take this as a yes, you would leave your wife if her weight gain was because of depression, and yes, you would break up your family and deprive your kids of one of their parents because your wife had massive weight gain.
Start another thread to ask this question. But please be advised, it should be posted in the parenting section.
Oh I'd love to answer your questions, but they are completely off topic and as the Moderator said - PLEASE STAY ON TOPIC.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Avienne
Oh, and? There is nothing mortifying about putting on 30 pounds. In fact, I think your number of 153 pounds probably just insulted quite a few women on this board. Gotta love a sensitive man who considers his audience!
LOL. Wow. I had to go back a re-read my posts to find out where "I" said that "I" think its mortifying to put on that much weight. I didnt say it, I said that is how my wife would feel. I would think that most women would feel upset as well even if they imagine putting on 25%-30% of whatever weight they are today. Would you be okay with yourself and/or proud of yourself if YOU put on 25%-30% MORE weight than where you are today? I dont think so. This isnt about being sensitive to the audience. Its about conversation and saying what a person will honestly believe in herself if this happens to her.
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No frankly I would not. That is one of the reasons why I strongly prefer HWP women. Overweight, but not obese or almost obese, may be ok, but even then, I would worry if they got pregnant, what would happen? If a woman gains 50 lbs during a pregnancy, but they're, for example, 5'7 and 130 lbs, well, they go to 180 and 5'7.....
that's usually not unattractive, but if a gal is already 200 lbs and gets pregnant and gains 50?......No thanks.
Heck, if my wife's weight went from 123 pounds where it is today to even 153 pounds (well short of the 230 plus pounds gained in the OPs example), she would be horrified, mortified, disgusted and extremely disappointed with herself and the extremely poor example she would be setting for our children. She would REALLY watch her nutrition intake and her workout/exercise routine to immediately curb the weight gain.
Quote:
Originally Posted by LaoTzuMindFu
I would think that most women would feel upset as well even if they imagine putting on 25%-30% of whatever weight they are today. Would you be okay with yourself and/or proud of yourself if YOU put on 25%-30% MORE weight than where you are today? I dont think so. This isnt about being sensitive to the audience. Its about conversation and saying what a person will honestly believe in herself if this happens to her.
I wouldn't be mortified. I might be worried about a few risks that run in my family, but it's not going to change who I am. In case you missed it, my comments on this thread amount to an argument against people being ashamed of their bodies. It's mentally unhealthy, and if your wife would be "horrified, mortified, disgusted and extremely disappointed" over 30 pounds, she has body image and self-esteem issues.
Which, come to think of it, makes you sharing her thoughts on the matter here disrespectful and insensitive to her in addition to any woman here who might be the oh-so-horrifying, mortifying, disgusting, and disappointing 153 pounds, or, OMG! heavier than that. But I can see how you'd miss that.
Bottom line is that when women stop wrapping so much of their self-worth in their bodies that they freak out over 30 pounds, conversations like this won't even happen. I mean, really? That's one dress size, not a diagnosis of advanced [URL="http://www.webmd.com/a-to-z-guides/necrotizing-fasciitis-flesh-eating-bacteria-topic-overview"]necrotizing fasciitis[/URL]. But as long as there are individuals who have no problems vocalizing their objectification of, and ridiculously unhealthy standards for, women, and as long as society pins a woman's worth to her figure, we'll have threads like this and all of the accompanying nonsense of a country rife with eating disorders. Don't shoot the messenger.
I already have my answers to the other questions and it seems clear that you've never actually had to deal with anything remotely like massive weight gain, so unless you have something new to add to the conversation, I'm done with responding to you here.
How about the other way around...my wife just told me recently that she's not very attracted to me anymore b/c I have lost too much weight. I was 5'8" and 155 lbs. when we first met, but now I'm 140 pounds. I have not been trying to lose weight, it is due to extreme stress. When I'm very stressed out, I have no appetite & just can't eat. I realize that I'm maybe beginning to get too thin, but there's not much I can do about it right now.
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