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This is so ironic to me. I've always been told I should go to church to find a good man. Apparently, that isn't the case here.
The selections are not the greatest at their particuliar place of worship, but it may be better at yours. So don't get discouraged. Try to check it out and see who is there. I do know a guy who used to like me, but I didn't like him, met his wife at a young professional Bible study. They are in a solid marriage with 2 beautiful kids...so it all depends on where you chose to worship
The selections are not the greatest at their particuliar place of worship, but it may be better at yours. So don't get discouraged. Try to check it out and see who is there. I do know a guy who used to like me, but I didn't like him, met his wife at a young professional Bible study. They are in a solid marriage with 2 beautiful kids...so it all depends on where you chose to worship
What I meant by that is that I am not a church-goer so I don't see why I would attend. It would be like a version of match.com. I'd be there for the prospective dating and not because I believed in what church is about.
What I meant by that is that I am not a church-goer so I don't see why I would attend. It would be like a version of match.com. I'd be there for the prospective dating and not because I believed in what church is about.
I can see how these women might have missed the boat. They are super Christian people and most super Christian people get married young and are less likely to divorce. There are less Christian singles the older you get. I'm not a Christian, but is there a Christian dating website where they can log on and wait to be pursued? Only half joking there....
Perhaps it's different for black women since being single isn't really much of an oddity. I am 47, never married, no kids and it's not because I am ugly, bitchy, too picky, or boring. I have standards that I uphold and I didn't date LOTS of men that crossed my path and I'll bet other women wouldn't have either. I have had relationships but none were right enough to be permanent. Either the man felt that way or I did and we moved on. BTW, I am still in touch with most of my exes, and many of them are 40+ and still single as well. So, so much for it being all about older women being "alone."
I have a good life -- I switched careers in my late 30s and for the past ten years, my life has been on an upswing. I am still attractive, slim and men ask me out. I have lots of girlfriends in similar situations. We work, travel, party and just live life trying not to focus on what society says our life is supposed to be. It is what it is. Maybe it's not perfect but a an early age my DAD told me that I might never marry. A man knows other men, I've come to realize.
To answer the larger question - and I am speaking of women over 35 - I think a lot of them who actually want to be married passed on early suitors thinking that something better would come along. But they were wrong, there wasn't a better choice out there, and as they continue to age the pickings start to get slim. Next thing they know, they turn 40 and are on the used goods market. Things probably look pretty grim here if you are single, not divorced! (It's like shopping for a new suit at the Salvation Army. Everything is damaged, even if you don't see the missing button at first glance. Yes I am talking about myself as well as the guys. I figure I earned my place here - it would really suck if I didn't.)
I think people, men and women, need to be realistic about what's out there. As a guy in my 30s, I know I'm more likely to meet women who are divorced and/or have kids now than I would've in my 20s. I can hold out for the 30something woman who's never been married and doesn't have any kids, but I could be waiting a long time. What's also true is that other guys are probably looking for these same women. It's the same for women who hold out for their ideal.
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Originally Posted by mandavaran
It gets old!!?? Does female griping ever get old? There are loads of angry frustrated women on here all the time. Maybe these guys are griping BECAUSE of the angry bitter women they encounter.
In any case,that's kind of the point of anonymous internet forums isn't it? To be able to gripe without pissing off your actual friends and families. Let's not just point fingers at the men though.
Whether women gripe as well is irrelevant. This thread is about women not finding men. Therefore the mindset of the men they meet becomes an issue.
Any suggestions??? I don't believe any would change faith because they can't get a man in their bed or I should rephrase that, they don't want a man in their bed until they are married.
I have recommended to them going to another church's single functions but they don't want to....
It's difficult for me to make a suggestion because I'm not religious in any way, so that kind of dating scene is foreign to me. I think your suggestion is good. If they are unwilling to make simple efforts, like going to another church's singles function, then I'm not sure what to say. Are they willing to make any efforts? When I was single my life was full of activity and meeting men was never a problem. Again, tho, there might be fewer types of guys out there that fit the your girls' bill.
Any suggestions??? I don't believe any would change faith because they can't get a man in their bed or I should rephrase that, they don't want a man in their bed until they are married.
I have recommended to them going to another church's single functions but they don't want to....
Are they interested in any other activities besides church? Maybe a sport or something? Have they considered volunteering? Maybe if they focus on just meeting people instead of finding a mate they will have better luck.
Of course this applies to your friends that don't require the $50,000 ring.
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