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THAT is false. Humans evolved for both sexes to be promiscuous maters. Our present culture is based on monogamy, but that's a social meme, not a biological one.
Two references for those who are actually intersted in understanding this:
1. Sex at Dawn: The prehistoric origins of human sexuality
2. Sperm Wars
I'm not basing my statement off anything I've read or learned, just off what I think.
Common sense tells me women would not be biologically programmed for promiscuity, because they need to take care of their offspring. Taking care of their offspring means: nurturing the offspring and providing resources for the offspring. Women cannot be sleeping around having many babies with many partners, bc then they would not be able to take care of all of them with regards to nurture and scarcity of resources.
Why are women biologically programmed to be promiscuous?
Humans evolved for both sexes to be promiscuous maters. Our present culture is based on monogamy, but that's a social meme, not a biological one.
If I go out and impregnate ten different women, but don't stick around to help provide for the ten kids that are born, how does that help ensure the survival of the species? It doesn't because those ten kids probably won't last long enough to pass on their genes. People hide behind the "biological programming" excuse to rationalize cheating.
A woman of the media, married to a politician in France said that the 'French' were less 'puritanical' about cheating/marriage.
I suppose that is good. Along with the 'physical act' goes diminishment of trust.
Why get married? That is my question.
I can't help but recall Prince Charles' infamous quote--at his engagement to Dianna---Q: Are you in love? Diana says, yes, of course and Charles said, 'Whatever love is.'
Then why did he later move heaven and earth to marry Camilla?
Unfortunately, no two people can even agree on what "Cheating" is? You have people on here swearing watching porn online is cheating. To someone else it may only exist in marriage and may not apply to a boyfriend or girlfriend. I had a woman I took on "one" date jump all over my sheet when she ran into me when I was out with another woman the following week. She made a big fuss like I was cheating on her! Never called that pyscho again.
Woman will most often jump down a mans throat if she hears about a man cheating on another woman unless it's her friend doing it. The Man will be grouped with Rapist and Child Molesters...Ridicules!!
Now a woman Cheating will be judged as a victim if she is cheating here. "What did your man do to make you cheat?" is the popular question.
If and when I get married I'm thinking open relationship is the way to go.
Quote:
Originally Posted by BKSnook
Why are women biologically programmed to be promiscuous?
Take it from me, there are plenty of woman out there having affairs. They just rationalize it better than men. Men do it for physical "Want!". Woman do it for psychological need! Right..Pfhh
Affairs don't cause people to split up, they are just an a by product of your SOs needs not being met or you being a crappy picker!
Unfortunately, no two people can even aggree on what "Cheating" is? You have people on here swearing watching porn online is cheating. To someone else it may only exist in marriage and may not apply to a boyfriend or girlfirend. I had a woman I took on "one" date jump all over my sheet when she ran into me when I was out with another woman the following week. She made a big fuss like I was cheating on her! Never called that pyscho again.
Woman will most often jump down a mans throat if she hears about a man cheating on another woman unless it's her friend doing it. The Man will be grouped with Rapist and Child Molesters...Ridiculas!!
Now a woman Cheating will be judged as a victim if she is cheating here. "What did your man do to make you cheat?" is the popular question.
If and when I get married I'm thinking open relationship is the way to go.
Take it from me, there are plenty of woman out there having affairs. They just rationalize it better than men. Men do it for physical "Want!". Woman do it for psychological need! Right..Pfhh
Really....we had the "what is cheating" talk awhile back. We both agree on what is and what isnt.
And to me a ho is a ho. It really doesnt matter if they are male or female. I dont think any females explanation for cheating is a get out jail free card.
Cheating is a bigger deal in my mind now because the world is more open to all types of relationships. If you WANT to screw around get in an open or casual relationship and state it as such. But its not cool to just MAKE it as such just for you without talking to your partner about it.
Which means they can change their mind. There was never any vow made, no concept of a sacrament or legal pact that marriage can signify.
And some people are just too trusting. They think that by having sex with someone on the first date that by the second date there is automatically some kind of trusting relationship. They never sat down with their sex partner and discussed having a committed monogamous relationship, they only assumed it because that's what they wanted.
You're right...some people are too trusting,and unfortunately as you said , they equate having sex with having a relationship. These are the people who are hurt when their assumptions of monogamy prove incorrect.You are right , they should have discussed what they wanted before laying down, if indeed they did want more....but at the same time, since you don't seem to desire a monogamus relationship, YOU should let the young woman know in the beginning....then if she just wants a fling...no hard feelings.
Really....we had the "what is cheating" talk awhile back. We both agree on what is and what isnt.
And to me a ho is a ho. It really doesnt matter if they are male or female. I dont think any females explanation for cheating is a get out jail free card.
Cheating is a bigger deal in my mind now because the world is more open to all types of relationships. If you WANT to screw around get in an open or casual relationship and state it as such. But its not cool to just MAKE it as such just for you without talking to your partner about it.
Very true.
I can't speak for anyone but myself but there is much to be said for being 'comfortable' with another. Given that each person will go through some ups and downs and all that--but creative people, and I believe all humans can find ways to cope, which might be part of a definition of creativity-- can adapt.
I really don't know what to say about myself-- thank goodness someone did.
I'm not basing my statement off anything I've read or learned, just off what I think.
Common sense tells me women would not be biologically programmed for promiscuity, because they need to take care of their offspring. Taking care of their offspring means: nurturing the offspring and providing resources for the offspring. Women cannot be sleeping around having many babies with many partners, bc then they would not be able to take care of all of them with regards to nurture and scarcity of resources.
Why are women biologically programmed to be promiscuous?
We evolved and lived in small tribal groups until very recently. In such groups, the entire community assisted each other. Breastfeeding typically created delays (a few years) between pregnancies until a child was weaned. Promiscuity made paternity impossible to determine, and all the possible fathers would have a potential interest in the well-being of their potential children. The women obtain the best genes - sperm competition is key to that. So, the phrase, "it takes a village to raise a child" is very appropriate.
Which means they can change their mind. There was never any vow made, no concept of a sacrament or legal pact that marriage can signify.
Anybody can change their mind at any time (including people who've entered into sacramental/legal arrangements). Cheating still isn't necessary when that's the case. When you change your mind, change your arrangement. Exit your existing relationship before beginning your next. Being upfront with what's changed is really the only respectful way to operate. People who no longer want to be in an exclusive relationship don't really have to cheat...they can always exit the relationship.
Quote:
And some people are just too trusting. They think that by having sex with someone on the first date that by the second date there is automatically some kind of trusting relationship. They never sat down with their sex partner and discussed having a committed monogamous relationship, they only assumed it because that's what they wanted.
Anybody who doesn't put their expectation of monogamy out there can't really cry "injured party" with any legitimacy...it's the responsibility of every person in a relationship to be upfront and communicative about their expectations. No room for grey area that way. If you're going to be physically intimate with somebody before you know them well enough to have discussed these things, then you can't really cry that your bond of trust has been damaged. You can't trust somebody you haven't bothered to take the time to get to know and who doesn't know you and your expectations.
Unfortunately, there are people who will very purposely NOT have these discussions prior to intimacy...some because they figure that if they're upfront about only looking for a fling, it could compromise their ability to get said action, and some because they figure that if they're upfront about looking for something exclusive, it could result in scaring the other party off. So people leave things unspoken and undefined, and then the problems crop up where there are two wholly different sets of expectations in play.
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