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Even as a guy, that hit home about the blaming and the disbelief. One of the reasons I always try to give the benefit of the doubt to someone who tells me they've been through something.
One thing that gets increasingly frustrating is when someone expects you to just somehow "see" that they are a good person and yet they have done nothing to differentiate themselves from others. Often times, the predator would also insist that they are good people as well.
Seeing that predatory people come in all shapes and sizes, I'd be unreasonable to expect someone to just somehow "know" that I'm not like the others and just drop whatever is going on in their life to entertain me.
Yes! x1000
I dont think people make up things like that, except in perhaps very very rare situations. Its horrid to accuse
someone of lying, especially at one of their most vulnerable moments.
True, perps look like normal people. We may have an intuition about someone, and the Gift of Fear talks about body language and signs to look for that someone has bad intentions, but often its not that obvious, and/or its a person we THOUGHT we knew and trusted.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ruth4Truth
This is not your friend. Ask her (or him), if it's "feminist" to want to stay safe. Friends are for being concerned about your well-being, peace of mind, and safety.
People don't even know what "feminist" means anymore. I might guess your "friend" is male, from the way he's turned the word into a vaguely-defined bogeyman.
I agree! With Tasha too.
Yes, he was male and an ex friend now. It really irritated me when he said that.
Last edited by moongirl00; 02-04-2020 at 10:38 AM..
Re internet dating -it favors women Overall -whether man or woman -a whole lot of twos out there looking for a ten
The most disturbing factor is current human nature -if they don’t have to practice honesty they won’t -without an overseer -they don’t function in a sustainable fashion - just an endless game of one group trying to rip off the other
Watch Facebook shorts on hyenas vs lions - there it is -eharmony
For it to work we must become human beings again not predators
Be careful! There's somebody named Greg posting here, who gets testy, when someone implies that 2's should date other 2's or 3's (even if those 2's may be diamonds-in-the-rough). It's not a popular idea to put out there, in the current climate on this sub-forum.
Location: As of 2022….back to SoCal. OC this time!
9,297 posts, read 4,584,857 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by moongirl00
Yes! x1000
I dont think people make up things like that, except in perhaps very very situations. Its horrid to accuse
someone of lying, especially at one of their most vulnerable moments.
True, perps look like normal people. We may have an intuition about someone, and the Gift of Fear talks about body language and signs to look for that someone has bad intentions, but often its not that obvious, and/or its a person we THOUGHT we knew and trusted.
Ita.........I have been harassed & stalked before & we should feel empowered. My fiance has taught me there are things we can do even on the internet..........steps we can take.........if we feel we are being harassed. I have found there are always friends.... & male friends......to protect us but you have to stand up for yourself 1st IMO...........no other way...right???
Have you been feeling better? I know from other threads you have experienced lots ......hugs
Ita.........I have been harassed & stalked before & we should feel empowered. My fiance has taught me there are things we can do even on the internet..........steps we can take.........if we feel we are being harassed. I have found there are always friends.... & male friends......to protect us but you have to stand up for yourself 1st IMO...........no other way...right???
Have you been feeling better? I know from other threads you have experienced lots ......hugs
Thank you, that is very sweet of you to ask. I am doing well these days.
Im sorry to hear you were (or are) being harassed. Yes we need to protect ourselves too. I used to enjoy hiking in the wilderness alone but feel I can no longer do that. I am ultra aware of my surroundings at all times, dont go anywhere at night, things like that. Its kind of tiring but its just better to be safer than unsafe.
Be careful! There's somebody named Greg posting here, who gets testy, when someone implies that 2's should date other 2's or 3's (even if those 2's may be diamonds-in-the-rough). It's not a popular idea to put out there, in the current climate on this sub-forum.
Even a lot of men are saying that people should stick to their "looks match".
My experience is you never know who is going to be attracted to you and who you are going to be attracted to.
Thank you, that is very sweet of you to ask. I am doing well these days.
Im sorry to hear you were (or are) being harassed. Yes we need to protect ourselves too. I used to enjoy hiking in the wilderness alone but feel I can no longer do that. I am ultra aware of my surroundings at all times, dont go anywhere at night, things like that. Its kind of tiring but its just better to be safer than unsafe.
That is a very unfortunate thing to happen. Being stalked, harassed, in a bad relationship can have such bad effects. After dealing with it myself, my mindset towards people changed. I have an increasingly hard time trusting people and there are certain places I feel differently. I even had a flashback when I went to a certain place where something happened to me. I didn't even expect that. But what I went through is only surface level compared to what I've heard from others. And one thing that is needed is someone who will listen.
Mine to, and the connection is rarely about objective levels of physical beauty.
But do you have a "type"? I definitely do. While I have strayed from my "type", it is what I find most attractive. I'm only speaking about physically. I have a type personality wise as well, so if the woman has both, its ideal.
But do you have a "type"? I definitely do. While I have strayed from my "type", it is what I find most attractive. I'm only speaking about physically. I have a type personality wise as well, so if the woman has both, its ideal.
Well...
(Only speaking for myself because...intriguing question)
I myself HAD a type. My personality type is stronger than physical type. I say my type is influenced by experience. If I met someone who I got on with so well at some point, then anyone who reminds me of that person is going to be my "type". For me, personality is going to have an influence on how a person looks to me.
Right now, I'm thinking of a woman who I wasn't the least bit attracted to but she kept pursuing me. I eventually became physically attracted to her more than another woman who I was initially physically attracted to.
That is a very unfortunate thing to happen. Being stalked, harassed, in a bad relationship can have such bad effects. After dealing with it myself, my mindset towards people changed. I have an increasingly hard time trusting people and there are certain places I feel differently. I even had a flashback when I went to a certain place where something happened to me. I didn't even expect that. But what I went through is only surface level compared to what I've heard from others. And one thing that is needed is someone who will listen.
A flashback, Im sorry to hear that.
Yes, its good to just vent about things on occasion, and to not feel alone, knowing bad things happen to everyone sometimes.
Its common to feel guilty or ashamed about it sometimes, like we must have caused it, we are damaged now, etc., but with good support from people we can let go those things. Im starting to feel less self blame and guilt over it and consider that a big step forward in the healing process.
Thank you for being supportive.
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......hugs
