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I'm a young college educated (black American) professional woman.
I'm very observant, and I've noticed (for some odd reason), people tend to usually react in a negative fashion towards me. Perhaps it's because I make them uncomfortable. For the record, there is nothing inherently intimidating about my presence. I'm actually quite petite. I take a great deal of pride in my appearance, as well as my professional work.
I've been told that I look 10 to 13 years younger than my actual age. Most people would probably mistake me for an 18 year old (in appearance alone). Much of this is due to the fact that I have never drank any form of alcohol or used any illicit drugs. I absolutely abhor bars, clubs, and lounges. Also, I must admit that genetics plays a role as well. I have dark skin; therefore, I'm less prone to age. I've noticed that other women in their late 20's/ early 30's (particularly white women) often look closer to 40 something. I'm wondering if this plays any role in why I'm perceived so negatively?
When I show up at meetings in my professional suits and heels, people seem to always take a double look. It's almost as if they are uncomfortable with confronting the realization that black American women are not a monolithic group. I strongly dislike rap/hip hop because it promotes the most destructive images of black women around the world. Unfortunately, people who have never even encountered a black woman, will often believe that we are all about partying and sex. I take a great deal of pride in my overall appearance and I go out of my way to dispel the negative stereotypes that are often associated with black women. I tend to be very conservative (in the truest sense). I would never engage in any form of pre-marital sex!
I do however realize that we are all individuals; therefore, I never judge others. I'm simply wondering why people tend to judge me so harshly. It's very odd, but sometimes I get the feeling that people are uncomfortable because I do not fit the 'sassy/finger snapping/ghetto' stereotype.
It's very sad that conservative black women, such as myself are ostracized for having values and morals.
So what are people doing that you would describe as a negative fashion?
[you've described yourself but not what they do beyond a "double look"]
Location: I live between Myrtle Beach SC and Raleigh NC.
393 posts, read 652,318 times
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I personally like a woman who is confident in herself and behaves that way. I am sure there are some men who are uncomfortable with a "strong" woman whatever her race. I would also say that there are some men who are even more taken aback by your positive and agressive attitude since you are a black woman and obviously attractive and intelligent to boot. Men are programmed to look at women not as equals and you are the exception to the norm for them. Dont take it personally as an affront but as a badge of honor. Its not a racial thing, its a gender thing. Walk proud and strong and those people who judge you, they are not worth your time! Enjoy your life it seems you have a good one.
You used the term "black", as well as "white", but then used "Asian American"(as opposed to just Asians). Most blacks that will add the "American" to someone's origin will refer to themselves as "African Americans".
That's just how it reads to me. Good luck with the thread
I used 'Black American' because although I do have distant ancestry in Africa, I choose to self identify as Black. I used Asian American, to differentiate between mainland Asians and American Asians. I've spent some time in Japan and China, and there's a big difference between native Asians and American born Asians.
I didn't really feel the need to use American after stating white and black, due to the context of the discussion.
And why are you jumping from a question of why you get unpleasant reactions from people to a conclusion that people dislike black conservative women? Maybe they don't like any conservative women. Maybe they just don't like you.
Well, I seem to get the most stares and outlandish looks when I'm dressed very nicely.
I used 'Black American' because although I do have distant ancestry in Africa, I choose to self identify as Black. I used Asian American, to differentiate between mainland Asians and American Asians. I've spent some time in Japan and China, and there's a big difference between native Asians and American born Asians.
I didn't really feel the need to use American after stating white and black, due to the context of the discussion.
In the post that I originally commented on, you didn't say "black American". You said "black males". Which is why my mind thinks you're Asian. Either a female or effeminate male.
So there ya go. Maybe they think you're Asian and can't figure out why you look black?
In the post that I originally commented on, you didn't say "black American". You said "black males". Which is why my mind thinks you're Asian. Either a female or effeminate male.
So there ya go. Maybe they think you're Asian and can't figure out why you look black?
Ok, well, I'm not Asian or male. As I stated, I'm a black American female.
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