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Old 09-28-2007, 07:15 PM
 
Location: In the sunshine on a ship with a plank
3,413 posts, read 8,837,664 times
Reputation: 2263

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Robyn, there's a fine line between love and hate..........the fact that you don't feel hate toward TJIBDA leads me to believe that you are truly over him.

I think that's a good thing. Some people go from love to hate and divorces get so ugly- but I think the progression sometimes needs to be that dramatic so that confusing feelings can be dealt with.

Too bad IB can't get there. Life would be much easier if he could.
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Old 09-29-2007, 05:21 AM
 
Location: NoVa
18,431 posts, read 34,360,429 times
Reputation: 19814
Last night we went out and got something to eat. A week ago I was taking a walk and I could smell the smell of someone washing their clothes.

Last night, when I walked out the back door of my house, I smelled that smell, I was washing clothes in my house! And drying them too!

The kids are being testy this morning, just like every other Saturday morning. When they talk to him on Friday, they sound excited towards him of going over to his house, but on the next morning, like right now...

doors slam, they whine. They don't want to get up. Why do I have to do this or that.

Alexander told me last night that tjibda complained to him that he only sees them 2 days a week. You dont complain to your kids like that. His 2 days, in my opinion, add up to more than I see them, really, because when I see them, I am all, ok, brush your teeth, do this, do that.

Its getting ready for school, and getting ready for bed. Not FUN TIME.

He will complain about Alexanders hair. It is still not cut. He will have to get over it. Alexander had to stay up late last night and finish a current events project that is due on Monday because a rule is that no homework can be done on the weekends, or no projects, etc, because that is his time with the kids.

Doors slamming, sounds like furniture moving,. geez.

He wanted me to send over more church clothes. I think he should go buy whatever he needs over there. Thats what I have to do here. But then that d=falls under the I pay you clause.

Alexander cut the grass yesterday, did a great job, and I commended, and thanked him. I let him know that if he kept his room clean all week and if I checked it on the day that he cuts, i will pay him 5 and he said wait, what do u mean by clean?

He was all excited. I doubt though, that he will clean his room.

Landlords brother jumped my car last night. I cannot find my glasses for the world. On thursday at work my head was hurting so bad I kept taking them off and putting them on my desk, wondering if they are there. I didn't notice them yesterday at work, but all I did was a prior auth on a couple of ct scans, and I got triaged to see the nurse prac., the nurse drew my blod because I had an order that stated end of sept, and the OM was staring at me the whole time.


She picked up the phone and buzzed the nurse and said it was taking to long to triage me, and she told her she just got done and she had to draw some blood and stated the drs name who ordered it. She, the OM said Robyn has work to do and she needs to get back to her desk.

I saw the NP walking in the door, and I said I wont be gone long. I went to my desk and sat down, made one call, and I was called back.

Saw the np. I feel a lot better after the 2-3 naps I took yesterday, they should have just let me go home early on thursday. The Aom asked me what was wrong w me, and couldn't I stay longer. I had asked the OM the day before if i could go home and she said I needed a note.

These people are crazy. I need a new job. Well, I have known that for a long time anyway.

I am so rambling here...
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Old 09-29-2007, 05:50 AM
 
Location: Beautiful TN!
5,453 posts, read 8,223,019 times
Reputation: 5705
Quote:
But then that d=falls under the I pay you clause
.

Robyn, please check into what child support is supposed to pay for. He should not be telling you that he does not have to help pay for anything extra for the children. What child support is meant to help for is "child support", help with bills, etc. If Alexander needs a hair cut, they both need church clothes, he should step up and help contribute. This might be an area that, if you so chose, you bring up during mediation. His misconception of parenting is so in left field that he will get a big shut down in legal proceedings.
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Old 09-29-2007, 12:10 PM
 
Location: California
72,416 posts, read 18,202,018 times
Reputation: 41665
robyn,you are stuck at 898,get your friends to rep you. I want to see you happy!
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Old 09-29-2007, 01:31 PM
 
788 posts, read 2,111,347 times
Reputation: 598
Robyn - the child support is for whatever you say it is for. You do not have to send more church clothes over UNLESS they come back. If IB wants something specific then he should provide it. You only have to send clothing. And the fun time thing is crap too - if they have homework or projects or whatever they should be able to do it there - a good supportive father would WANT to be involved in all aspects of their lives - but he is selfish and is trying to hurt you - he can't see that it is only hurting them - but you are good at NOT SWEATING THE SMALL STUFF.......
It's actually kinda sad that the man just lost his whole family and all he can think of to do is to play stupid little games.
When I get really angry - I have a VERY bad temper and flip out - so to avoid that I try to take the 5 year plan. I try to stop and ask myself if I will still be really angry in 5 years - will it still matter.....if no I try to let it go - if yes I flip out.
Most of the stuff now won't matter - it's the bigger picture - if you let him treat you a certain way it will set the tone forever.....

I was doing wash this am and I bought the "good" fabric softner - the new Downy Fereze - anyway - I went out back to throw trash away and I smelled the "smell."
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Old 09-29-2007, 01:56 PM
 
Location: NoVa
18,431 posts, read 34,360,429 times
Reputation: 19814
Quote:
Originally Posted by I love the Bears View Post
Robyn - the child support is for whatever you say it is for. You do not have to send more church clothes over UNLESS they come back. If IB wants something specific then he should provide it. You only have to send clothing. And the fun time thing is crap too - if they have homework or projects or whatever they should be able to do it there - a good supportive father would WANT to be involved in all aspects of their lives - but he is selfish and is trying to hurt you - he can't see that it is only hurting them - but you are good at NOT SWEATING THE SMALL STUFF.......
It's actually kinda sad that the man just lost his whole family and all he can think of to do is to play stupid little games.
When I get really angry - I have a VERY bad temper and flip out - so to avoid that I try to take the 5 year plan. I try to stop and ask myself if I will still be really angry in 5 years - will it still matter.....if no I try to let it go - if yes I flip out.
Most of the stuff now won't matter - it's the bigger picture - if you let him treat you a certain way it will set the tone forever.....

I was doing wash this am and I bought the "good" fabric softner - the new Downy Fereze - anyway - I went out back to throw trash away and I smelled the "smell."

Hey ILTB!!! Everything you have said is correct, and the smell...it is so sweet..never thought I would be so happy to wash clothes in my life! The little things...

Right now I am spending some time w a friend fr work. T. Took the kids this morning to meet ib and went on fr there... have done nothing at the house today! May miss church tomorrow and do some things... Feels good here just to chill and talk...
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Old 09-29-2007, 03:13 PM
 
788 posts, read 2,111,347 times
Reputation: 598
I know the feeling and the pleasure of doing nothing. My husband is a huge hunter and he is very sad because his gparent's farm is being sold next month - anyway he gets up at the butt crack of dawn to go deer hunting - he comes home for lunch - today he suprised me by taking our 5 yr old Haley and me to get pumpkins, mums and corn stalks for the house. I decorated for Halloween today!!!! That and laundry - there are 6 of us and the mounds of clothing are going to take over the house soon!
You are in my thoughts and I have been thinking of my bright years (I call that time when I stepped into the light that in my mind). Katie - my 12 yr old - and I were talking about when it was just the three of us (along with my 16 yr old son) and she said that as much as she loves our family now - she sometimes misses when it was just the three of us. You are making such special times for your children now.
Sorry for the rambling - glad you're having a nice day with a friend in your home. Stay home tomorrow if you want - God will understand~
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Old 09-29-2007, 07:14 PM
 
Location: NoVa
18,431 posts, read 34,360,429 times
Reputation: 19814
Default A display of lights from the front porch of 'Chimes

I kept hearing these noises, sounded like guns, heard kids, I was thinking what in the world?!?!

In my jamas..LOL...I went out on the front porch and before my eyes were fireworks, and they are still going on strong.

I called the kids around 8 to tell them goodnight and they were not there. I left a message on his machine, because he screens his calls and made the remark, "If it is important, they will leave a message." Then I called his cell.

Lindsay sort of answered, but she didn't say anything. In the background he said are you going to say anything?

Then she said hello. I got to talk to her for maybe 20 seconds. Then about that long w Alexander.

I dont know what he does to them to make them feel they cannot talk to me, but I don't like it. Before, the week before last I guess, when I called them, they were at Pizza Hut, and Alexander said they could not talk to me because he was talking to the each of them when they were talking to me, and they were trying to pay attn to him and listen to me at the same time...

The noise of the fire works plays on...

I got some good rest in today, along with spending some time with friend T. When I came home, Chef boyardee made dinner for me
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Old 09-29-2007, 07:28 PM
 
Location: California
11,466 posts, read 19,351,670 times
Reputation: 12713
Default Chef boyardee made dinner for me

"Chef boyardee made dinner for me" You must have lost your taste buds along with your glasses
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Old 09-29-2007, 07:56 PM
 
Location: NoVa
18,431 posts, read 34,360,429 times
Reputation: 19814
Quote:
Originally Posted by Roaddog View Post
"Chef boyardee made dinner for me" You must have lost your taste buds along with your glasses
LOL I had to eat SOMETHING!

have you seen my glasses anywhere?

And it was the overstuffed ravioli by the way.... it was not as good as I remembered from when i was a kid. Hmm. It worked, I was not hungry anymore!
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