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The only time I spend with a female is the woman I am dating and intimate with.
Its unhealthy to spend your time with women who are so called friends, they aren't
You need great guy friends and a good woman as your SO
Thats it, none of this friend stuff, they aren't real friends.
A real friend has your back in a fight, can help you fix your car, hike and mtn climb with you, etc.
Your wife, gf, fiance is your SO you can teach or do those things with.
Gay men have females as their friends, nothing wrong with gay men but if you are straight, its not normal to have female friends (work doesn't count, thats work - and a contrived environment, and the girl who set you up with her friend, isn't your friend like your male friend, she is an acquantiance, barely)
Bingo, dump the women friends.
I kept in contact with some girls from college afterward, but what for?
Correct.
Guys should have guys as the majority of their friends, and women as SO's or maybe someone you date.
Women should have the mirror-image situation.
It's better that way.
Bingo, dump the women friends.
I kept in contact with some girls from college afterward, but what for?
Correct.
Guys should have guys as the majority of their friends, and women as SO's or maybe someone you date.
Women should have the mirror-image situation.
It's better that way.
Wow if I played by your rules I would only have about 3 friends.
You came out and suggested my bud was desperate and pathetic because he waited for a woman.
To which I respond ... not everybody's lives are the same.
If my buddy looked like a model and was a smooth talker, could he have gotten her at first swing? Yes, probably. He's not. Far from. Won't get into it, but he got her doing his thing.
The world ain't fair. Just because you turned down 20 guys to the junior homecoming dance doesn't mean a guy is pathetic because he's a 25 year old virgin.
Sometimes you have to view lives from other people's perspectives...
He must know deep down that he's her backup plan, he obviously had feelings for her that weren't mutual. Far from ideal IMO, and not much of a success story.
Is the same true for when men friend zone women? Just wondering...
Do men actually do this? Generally, this is when a woman strings a guy along for what he can provide her, without any need for a commitment or even anything in return. Generally, guys can support themselves and provide the "heavy lifting" in their life.
In comparison, women can be very needy and will think nothing of using men whenever they can. Guys can fall into this trap because relationships are generally seen as men providing for women and they initially don't realize that they are being used. This will seldom occur in reverse, except in the most perverse ways.
hope this link works: http://davidcollard.wordpress.com/2010/11/15/women-policing-the-heirarchy/ (broken link)
That is a pretty "out there" link, Eddie. Did you read the rest of his posts?
Also, relevant to this thread I think:
"A woman may very well form a friendship with a man, but for this to endure, it must be assisted by a little physical antipathy"
I've been put in the friend zone myself a few times in my past. And for me, it doesn't feel good at all.
In my case its never been about the sex because to me that's secondary, and often wears off after a time. At the time when I was interested in dating, I simply wanted someone to accept me for me, and I had no problem in building a solid friendship, as that's how most solid relationships begin from anyway.
But over time, I just got tired of having to put in so much energy, time and money into trying to know someone new, only to be put into the friend-zone. Or to be told "we will only be nothing but just friends". Talking about a confidence breaker.
And the bad thing about it is, is that it makes one feel that its all they are good for, and that they're aren't any good for anything else.
So for myself, I just stay away from the dating game/scene just because I just don't want to be bothered anymore. There are always women who always wonder where the good men are; they are everywhere, even right in front of them; women just simply ignore and overlook them.
Do men actually do this? Generally, this is when a woman strings a guy along for what he can provide her, without any need for a commitment or even anything in return. Generally, guys can support themselves and provide the "heavy lifting" in their life.
In comparison, women can be very needy and will think nothing of using men whenever they can. Guys can fall into this trap because relationships are generally seen as men providing for women and they initially don't realize that they are being used. This will seldom occur in reverse, except in the most perverse ways.
I don't know any guys who have done it, at least not in a manipulative way like women often do. Maybe the girl has really attractive friends so she's deemed cool by association and then she won't c*ckblock. Men have a natural "drive" to protect and provide and many women will exploit that.
That is a pretty "out there" link, Eddie. Did you read the rest of his posts?
Also, relevant to this thread I think:
"A woman may very well form a friendship with a man, but for this to endure, it must be assisted by a little physical antipathy"
-Friedrich Nietzsche
No, just that one and the comments of course. I believe it's meant to be taken with a grain of salt, but explains some of the cattiness common of women especially when young. It seems turning a guy down isn't enough for many of them, they feel the need to give him a public trashing thereby cementing him beneath them.
I've been put in the friend zone myself a few times in my past. And for me, it doesn't feel good at all.
In my case its never been about the sex because to me that's secondary, and often wears off after a time. At the time when I was interested in dating, I simply wanted someone to accept me for me, and I had no problem in building a solid friendship, as that's how most solid relationships begin from anyway.
But over time, I just got tired of having to put in so much energy, time and money into trying to know someone new, only to be put into the friend-zone. Or to be told "we will only be nothing but just friends". Talking about a confidence breaker.
And the bad thing about it is, is that it makes one feel that its all they are good for, and that they're aren't any good for anything else.
So for myself, I just stay away from the dating game/scene just because I just don't want to be bothered anymore. There are always women who always wonder where the good men are; they are everywhere, even right in front of them; women just simply ignore and overlook them.
I've had this happen to me numerous times and I am a woman. Yeah it blows to spend time with a guy, have everything in common with them, think something might happen, and then when you put yourself out there and get back a line like "oh you are just too good for me, and you are like a sister to me anyway." then the next thing you know he's seeing some bimbo that wouldn't know what he liked if it bit her in the face. Prime example is the first guy that I possibly ever loved who was in a band. I went to all of their shows, meanwhile the girl he found couldn't be bothered to sit thru one of their sets.
Even more awesome for us ladies who get friend zoned, sometimes the guys think that they can disapprove of whomever we end up being interested in when they take the brother idea too far.
So, now I just assume they don't want me rather than making an effort. In fact I will be seeing a friend that I am soooo into in a few weeks and we have sooo much in common and I am just going to make sure I don't make a fool out of myself.
Oh and lol at you guys who think we are terrible beasts that only do thIs to you guys and it never happens vice versa.
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