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you might be a fat girl dater if
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if you are unemployed and living at home .
if you are low self esteem
if you are immature
if you play x box alot
if you dont have a car
if you dont pick up the tab
if you have no manners wear black alot and slouch and pick your nose and do butthead beavis imitations alot
I've read a few of your posts and thought you were better than this. If this is meant in good fun, forgive my sensitivity. I believe a lot of people would find it offensive and hurtful, and speaks poorly of "fat girls" by suggesting that the only types of guys they can get are the zeroes described above. I am none of the above. I have a solid job, do not suffer from low self esteem (actually sometimes suffer from too much self esteem) I like to think I'm not immature, I have never even owned an X-box, I have 1 car and 1 SUV, support my family, and behave like a gentleman in public. And I am a "fat girl" dater*.
I recently opened my relationship to polyamory and have been dating people outside of my primary partner. One of these men is 28, makes 6 figures, and drives an Audi convertible. The other has a PhD in CS and works for a top tech company in the area, also probably making 6 figures. While my primary partner makes less than me, my exes pretty much all follow this sort of model. Most are programmers or computer engineers who earn a decent living.
And, I reiterate, I'm obese, only slowly starting to grow my hair back following chemo, and covered in scars from surgeries and as a side effect from one of my chemo drugs. Clearly not all successful men feel that they have to "settle" for a fat girl, or I would not date the men I do.
I should also note that I don't go for "rich" guys - as my boyfriend can attest to. The type of man I'm attracted to is fairly nerdy and is as ambitious as I am, which seems to lend itself to a higher paycheck.
I recently opened my relationship to polyamory and have been dating people outside of my primary partner. One of these men is 28, makes 6 figures, and drives an Audi convertible. The other has a PhD in CS and works for a top tech company in the area, also probably making 6 figures. While my primary partner makes less than me, my exes pretty much all follow this sort of model. Most are programmers or computer engineers who earn a decent living.
And, I reiterate, I'm obese, only slowly starting to grow my hair back following chemo, and covered in scars from surgeries and as a side effect from one of my chemo drugs. Clearly not all successful men feel that they have to "settle" for a fat girl, or I would not date the men I do.
I should also note that I don't go for "rich" guys - as my boyfriend can attest to. The type of man I'm attracted to is fairly nerdy and is as ambitious as I am, which seems to lend itself to a higher paycheck.
I'm not gonna lie...I'm a bit jealous
I can't get a single date with a guy who doesn't have a bunch of kids or smokes a ton of weed and you can date three pretty good guys.
I don't think you should date fat women. If you're a guy and your in shape and you like girls large and in charge that's one thing but if you're being lazy that's something different. If a girl whose in shape, looks good (i.e. the type you want to test drive) sees you kicking it to a fat girl she'll be like "wtf, why am I putting effort into my looks" and she will be enticed to the dark side (aka the fatness).
That's just how I feel.
In my early 20s I dated some big girls and they were sweet women but when they sat on my lap I felt like I was powerlifting (just to move an inch).
I can't get a single date with a guy who doesn't have a bunch of kids or smokes a ton of weed and you can date three pretty good guys.
I really need to move.
It's all about confidence! So much easier said than done, I know.
I was having a conversation about this with a friend of mine recently. She's slim, gorgeous (and is almost 30 but looks not a day over 22), incredibly intelligent (about to start an MPP at Columbia), and dates a lot. She told me that she doesn't think of me as "fat" because I hold my head up and go for it, no matter the circumstance. It slims me down in her mind, whereas we have mutual friends who very much focus on losing weight because they hate their body and while I might have 50 pounds on them, they seem "fatter" to her.
Though I do think where I live tends to cater more to intellectual, nerdy people and I have found that those who are more sexually open tend to be less focused on looks (which seems counter intuitive!).
In a lot of ways, I'd rather a guy get involved with me now than when I'm thinner. I will only keep going down from here... and if a guy loves me when I'm fat and weak from chemo, then I won't worry so much about the physical changes if I relapse again or due to age, pregnancy, etc. Men who are interested in me now aren't going to look at me when I'm 30, 40, 50 and decide that they aren't attracted to me anymore. And while I work to lose weight, it's 100% for me because I LOVE my body, not because I hate my body and feel the need to please others. It's liberating.
Do you do online dating? I could be your dating coach!
It's all about confidence! So much easier said than done, I know.
I was having a conversation about this with a friend of mine recently. She's slim, gorgeous (and is almost 30 but looks not a day over 22), incredibly intelligent (about to start an MPP at Columbia), and dates a lot. She told me that she doesn't think of me as "fat" because I hold my head up and go for it, no matter the circumstance. It slims me down in her mind, whereas we have mutual friends who very much focus on losing weight because they hate their body and while I might have 50 pounds on them, they seem "fatter" to her.
Though I do think where I live tends to cater more to intellectual, nerdy people and I have found that those who are more sexually open tend to be less focused on looks (which seems counter intuitive!).
In a lot of ways, I'd rather a guy get involved with me now than when I'm thinner. I will only keep going down from here... and if a guy loves me when I'm fat and weak from chemo, then I won't worry so much about the physical changes if I relapse again or due to age, pregnancy, etc. Men who are interested in me now aren't going to look at me when I'm 30, 40, 50 and decide that they aren't attracted to me anymore. And while I work to lose weight, it's 100% for me because I LOVE my body, not because I hate my body and feel the need to please others. It's liberating.
Do you do online dating? I could be your dating coach!
Oh, I'm super confident, don't let my posts on this board mislead you In fact, I've been told by multiple people they wished they were as happy and confident as I am and I have a huge circle of friends from all over the globe. Relationships seem to elude me, though.
I definitely command attention (I'm 6'1 and busty with bright red hair and tattoos) and I'm not sure if that's a good thing for a relationship...but it's GREAT for making friends
I do use online dating, and have had pretty horrible luck so far, but I started a new profile and have decided to just be super selective, even if I remain single for a good long time. It's been 3 years so far, I can wait a bit longer
Honestly, I think a lot of it has to do with the area in which I live. It's a college town and I'm over college age, but I'm moving this winter so I'm hoping it will widen my dating pool a bit. No more stoners and burn-outs for me
I don't think you should date fat women. If you're a guy and your in shape and you like girls large and in charge that's one thing but if you're being lazy that's something different. If a girl whose in shape, looks good (i.e. the type you want to test drive) sees you kicking it to a fat girl she'll be like "wtf, why am I putting effort into my looks" and she will be enticed to the dark side (aka the fatness).
That's just how I feel.
In my early 20s I dated some big girls and they were sweet women but when they sat on my lap I felt like I was powerlifting (just to move an inch).
Then that is her problem (and choice). If she is going to modify her personal appearance to please someone else, then physical appearance is the least of her problems. Unfortunately, a lot of men and women do this. People should be able to date anyone with whom there is a mutual attraction without fear of someone else's opinion. I recognize that what you posted is just your opinion, but one of the problems we have here is that too many people are too quick to share opinion before they have put any intelligent thought into it.
Never been into fat women. I tried dating three because I thought I was limiting myself and didn't want to be superficial. The attraction is just never there for me. I don't feel bad, I'm short and lots of women don't like short men, even if they have everything they are looking for in a guy. This is not to disrespect fat women, because to each their own right? I have a few friends who "prefer" big girls.
I know a ton of fat women who would never look twice at a FAT GUY. In fact, most of the fat women I know (I have quite a few female friends on the large side) "only" date tall, athletic or muscular men. These guys usually use them for a quickie every once in a while, and pump them and dump them, but they DO get them into their beds, and these women continue to chase them so..... they do get attention.
If you are a fat woman, comfortable being fat and are confident, there should be little problem in you attracting men.
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In fact, I've been told by multiple people they wished they were as happy and confident as I am and I have a huge circle of friends from all over the globe. Relationships seem to elude me, though. 