Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I thought a little more about this talk about mandatory paternity tests.
For as much as people want to make this about a woman duping a man, I suspect what would happen is it would just expedite the system of establishing paternity with an individual who doesn't want to admit his responsibility in the matter. A court order could be obtained the day the baby was born, law enforcement could go collect the would be dad, and the whole process would just go much faster. Currently it seems like the courts are often slow here.
So you're going to award the mom for what she did single-handedly to this family.
IMO this is what it's about here, to punish HER not the kids but probably the mom injected her bad words about him and has accomplished severing ties between him and the kids and this after all the time, love and financial support he gave these kids.
If more men who fathered children not biologically his own found out AFTER THE FACT and are no longer together with the ex-wife did what this man did maybe more women would think twice before trying to deceive any man to become a father to someone else's kid(s). Lies shouldn't happen in the first place and men do not always have "x-ray" knowledge of otherwise when a woman says the children are his when they are not.
The kids here who I do feel badly for can look up to their mom to one who has also deceived them all of these years. Just a bad story all around.
A lie is a lie is a lie.
When a man does wrong he's by most women and depending on the action rightly so.
Time for some women to take accountability and pay "the price" like most men have done for a long long time.
Okay. So one of your kids flunked the paternity test. I get it.
I didn't say it is an easy choice. But in the course of exacting revenge (And that's what it is. Because 25,000 pounds is a pretty paltry settlement) what has happened is that the circumstances of the children have now been dragged out into the open. And, what's more, this legal action did not take place within the confines of the family court, where secrecy is pretty much a given in order to protect children, but in open court for all the world to see. To me, that would have been the intelligent place to argue the case.
Nope. The motivation was to let the world know what the wife did to him, and the kids will pay the price for it for the rest of their lives.
It irks me that that he is whining about being alienated from his children and would love to be in their lives at the same time going on about how he basically is no longer a father and its too late to have children. He fails to consider that it was his decision to put the kids thru a law suit by paternity testing weather it was to either get his CS back and punish his ex or because he actually felt deprived of a relationship and wanted to punish his ex that actually destroyed his parental relationship with the kids.
I know, I couldn't tell either whether the alienation came first (e.g., "My ex ruined my relationship with my children and now they are not in my life" vs. "Those are not my real children and now it's too late to have any"). That quote of his sounds harsh but we don't hear it in context, and we don't really know the sequence of events or the whole story at all. This is the kind of flame-bait story where later somebody realizes that the guy knew the whole time he was sterile but it doesn't fit with the manufactured drama.
Okay. So one of your kids flunked the paternity test. I get it.
I didn't say it is an easy choice. But in the course of exacting revenge (And that's what it is. Because 25,000 pounds is a pretty paltry settlement) what has happened is that the circumstances of the children have now been dragged out into the open. And, what's more, this legal action did not take place within the confines of the family court, where secrecy is pretty much a given in order to protect children, but in open court for all the world to see. To me, that would have been the intelligent place to argue the case.
Nope. The motivation was to let the world know what the wife did to him, and the kids will pay the price for it for the rest of their lives.
Nope I have no kids.
The kids already with their mom's deception alone are paying for it.
The kids already with their mom's deception are paying for it.
Okay. So if you have no kids, then you don't really get it.
Because there's the matter of being the biological parent and then there's the matter of being the parent who raised the children. One link is genetic. But the other one is much more deep and more profound. Because so much of a child's emotional development and self-esteem is linked to his or her paternal relationship, the situation described in this thread would prove devastating to any child. So what this man did to these children is pretty much on the same level as what his wife did to him.
To be sure, there will be a time to discreetly reveal the children's true genetic inheritance to them. But to drag it out into open court so that they're on the six o'clock news is an awful thing to do. By doing so, you are choosing to traumatize blameless children in order to make a point.
Okay. So if you have no kids, then you don't really get it.
Because there's the matter of being the biological parent and then there's the matter of being the parent who raised the children. One link is genetic. But the other one is much more deep and more profound. Because so much of a child's emotional development and self-esteem is linked to his or her paternal relationship, the situation described in this thread would prove devastating to any child. So what this man did to these children is pretty much on the same level as what his wife did to him.
To be sure, there will be a time to discreetly reveal the children's true genetic inheritance to them. But to drag it out into open court so that they're on the six o'clock news is an awful thing to do. By doing so, you are choosing to traumatize blameless children in order to make a point.
Yes I DO get it!
Raising the children by deception is where it's at here and if he had known beforehand it would've gave him the choice to stay or go.
The mom has to be fully accountable for every aspect of this mess.
The kids have been done bad by their mom - the aftermath is what it is.
Okay. So if you have no kids, then you don't really get it.
Because there's the matter of being the biological parent and then there's the matter of being the parent who raised the children. One link is genetic. But the other one is much more deep and more profound. Because so much of a child's emotional development and self-esteem is linked to his or her paternal relationship, the situation described in this thread would prove devastating to any child. So what this man did to these children is pretty much on the same level as what his wife did to him.
To be sure, there will be a time to discreetly reveal the children's true genetic inheritance to them. But to drag it out into open court so that they're on the six o'clock news is an awful thing to do. By doing so, you are choosing to traumatize blameless children in order to make a point.
Raising the children by deception is where it's at here and if he had known beforehand it would've gave him the choice to stay or go.
The mom has to be fully accountable for every aspect of this mess.
The kids have been done bad by their mom - the aftermath is what it is.
No. The husband was done wrong by the mom. The mom actually did what was in the best interest of the kids. She provided them with a stable home and family life and loving father. She wronged her husband not her kids.
The desire for revenge is what created the aftermath. The mom is accountable for infidelity and deceiving her husband and perhaps for the divorce. The father is accountable for his choice to sacrifice the well being of the children for the sake of revenge.
She acted selfishly without regard to how her actions (infidelity, deceipt) would hurt those who loved her (her husband).
He acted selfishly without regard to how his actions (revenge, alienation) would hurt those who loved him (his kids).
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
by most women and depending on the action rightly so.
