"But I want to pick you up at your place!" (dating, women)
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I was set up with this guy through a mutual friend. By the second date, he was asking to pick me up at my place. I said no, I'm not comfortable with that, I'd rather meet you out. He seemed a little baffled by that, but stayed quiet about it.
Move onto the third date and he is basically insisting that he pick me up at my place. Again, I said no, I am still getting to know you and I'd prefer to meet you out. Instead of just accepting that that was my comfort level, he got very defensive and started to push back. This was the final nail in the coffin. There will be no fourth date.
Guys, if a woman isn't comfortable with something, just let it be. If you really care about someone, you don't want them to feel uncomfortable or pushed into something they don't want to do. Respect a woman's boundaries. Don't take it personally and get defensive and make it all about you.
I was set up with this guy through a mutual friend. By the second date, he was asking to pick me up at my place. I said no, I'm not comfortable with that, I'd rather meet you out. He seemed a little baffled by that, but stayed quiet about it.
Move onto the third date and he is basically insisting that he pick me up at my place. Again, I said no, I am still getting to know you and I'd prefer to meet you out. Instead of just accepting that that was my comfort level, he got very defensive and started to push back. This was the final nail in the coffin. There will be no fourth date.
Guys, if a woman isn't comfortable with something, just let it be. If you really care about someone, you don't want them to feel uncomfortable or pushed into something they don't want to do. Respect a woman's boundaries. Don't take it personally and get defensive and make it all about you.
Agreed. He should have just let it go. He was pushy. He is not respecting your boundaries either. He is also trying to see what he can get away with. You nailed it and you are right for not wanting to go out with him again. Find somebody who will respect your boundaries. Good luck.
Last edited by supermanpansy; 11-01-2014 at 05:22 PM..
I was set up with this guy through a mutual friend. By the second date, he was asking to pick me up at my place. I said no, I'm not comfortable with that, I'd rather meet you out. He seemed a little baffled by that, but stayed quiet about it.
Move onto the third date and he is basically insisting that he pick me up at my place. Again, I said no, I am still getting to know you and I'd prefer to meet you out. Instead of just accepting that that was my comfort level, he got very defensive and started to push back. This was the final nail in the coffin. There will be no fourth date.
Guys, if a woman isn't comfortable with something, just let it be. If you really care about someone, you don't want them to feel uncomfortable or pushed into something they don't want to do. Respect a woman's boundaries. Don't take it personally and get defensive and make it all about you.
Quote:
Originally Posted by supermanpansy
Agreed. He should have just let it go. He was pushy. He is not respecting your boundaries. He is also trying to see what he can get away with. You nailed it and you are right for not wanting to go out with him again. Find somebody who will respect your boundaries. Good luck.
well said both of you. and it doesnt even have to be a man wanting to pick the girl up at her place either. sometimes guys may not want the girl to know where he lives as well. people have boundaries for a reason.
I was set up with this guy through a mutual friend. By the second date, he was asking to pick me up at my place. I said no, I'm not comfortable with that, I'd rather meet you out. He seemed a little baffled by that, but stayed quiet about it.
Move onto the third date and he is basically insisting that he pick me up at my place. Again, I said no, I am still getting to know you and I'd prefer to meet you out. Instead of just accepting that that was my comfort level, he got very defensive and started to push back. This was the final nail in the coffin. There will be no fourth date.
Guys, if a woman isn't comfortable with something, just let it be. If you really care about someone, you don't want them to feel uncomfortable or pushed into something they don't want to do. Respect a woman's boundaries. Don't take it personally and get defensive and make it all about you.
Well, not all men are asssholes, just the ones you've encountered.
I was caught off guard by a date a couple years ago. First date from OKC, never met her in my life.
I told her to meet me at a pub and she asked me to pick her up. I think I even asked her "are you sure?" I really did enjoy chatting with her on the trip to the pub and back, it's a little more personal. But I'd never offer to pick up a women unless I knew she was feeling it.
She was very outgoing and a ton of fun. We were like the center of attention at the bar. Ended up meeting some people and going ice fishing with them the next day. We didn't continue seeing each other because she worked nights and I worked days.. Definitely had tons of fun with her though. She was just very confident and honestly enjoyed life.
I feel the same way you do for the first couple of dates, but if I don't trust a guy by the 3rd date, I shouldn't be dating him.
How can you trust somebody by the third date? You cannot possibly know someone by the third date!
The only way I would trust someone by the third date is if I had known them prior and had already gotten a sense of who they are. That comes with TIME.
How can you trust somebody by the third date? You cannot possibly know someone by the third date!
The only way I would trust someone by the third date is if I had known them prior and had already gotten a sense of who they are. That comes with TIME.
If you're dating this person, you have put some trust in him already.
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