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You're being really dramatic. How invested are you in someone after TWO dates even if they were great dates. I understand being disappointed. Anyone would be, but not to this level and feeling wronged. This man didn't lead you on. He decided for whatever reason as is his right that he didn't wish to see you anymore and he even did the respectful thing which was to let you know he didn't want to continue instead of ghosting on you which is what most people do these days. You were an active participants in the kissing, cuddling, hand holding. If you didn't want to be that close after only one or two dates, then that's on you to find out what he's looking for first or to tell him to slow down.
I don't think she's being really dramatic, she feels rejected, anyone would and its not a good feeling. Sometimes you just meet someone who gets in your head and you can't help it. The upside to this is in a week or two he will be a distant memory since it was only two dates.
I do agree though that his honesty was quite honorable, lots of guys would have just fallen off the face of the earth with no explanation, instead this guy wanted to give her some closure.
The kind of guys who go for me in the old way of not online dating are not usually the kind of guys I go for lol. I mean sometimes it happens but not often. I actually get rooster blocked a lot lmao. Anyway on me being too dramatic maybe. Like I said I'm intuitive and my gut said this was going to go somewhere. It's disappointing but I'll get over it in time. It's clear he never was that into me.
You're being really dramatic. How invested are you in someone after TWO dates even if they were great dates. I understand being disappointed. Anyone would be, but not to this level and feeling wronged. This man didn't lead you on. He decided for whatever reason as is his right that he didn't wish to see you anymore and he even did the respectful thing which was to let you know he didn't want to continue instead of ghosting on you which is what most people do these days. You were an active participants in the kissing, cuddling, hand holding. If you didn't want to be that close after only one or two dates, then that's on you to find out what he's looking for first or to tell him to slow down.
i don't think she is overly dramatic.
She is disappointed and she has all right to be. He DID lead her on. They shared intimacy and kissed. She hoped for more because he led her believe it is all great.
However, most guys just disappear without saying anything. OP, you got lucky he even told you.
I have been dropped after 2-9 GREAT dates with NO reason at all, and I am hoping they got in an accident and are still in a coma and therefore couldn't contact me anymore.
I know it's pathetic, but I am hoping to hear from him even though I know it's not likely.
I met a guy online and we had a nice dinner on Friday night. There was never a dull moment in conversation, flirting was good, and we shared a lot of mutual interests. He later asked if I still wanted to do something after dinner so we did and went on a nice walk and shared a bottle of wine. He held my hand throughout the night after dinner. He went in for the kiss and we had nice, gentle kisses a few times during that night. He then asked me if I wanted to go out the very next day so I said yes.
When I came back home, he called me and we were on the phone for 45 minutes.
On Saturday we went on a hike and then watched a movie. Again no dull moments in conversation and he kissed me throughout the date again and still held my hand throughout the date. He texted me how he had a great time and I said I felt the same.
I then stopped hearing from him. Normally I don't care if a guy drop off the face of the Earth but for the first time in maybe 2 years, I met someone I actually really liked despite only going out 2 times! He just had a lot of the qualities I look for which are hard to find in 1 person.
I finally heard from him and he sent me something along the lines of "You are a great girl and I enjoyed having dinner with you but we are too different. Best wishes".
Completely blindsided me based on his actions and words.
I normally do not do this because typically when I've asked this, guys just come up with a lie to spare my feelings but I asked him why he doesn't want to see me anymore. He said something like "We have nothing in common and I don't want to start a relationship with someone I have nothing in common with, and I don't want to lead you on."
WTF? We had chemistry, both have the same taste in music, both like to travel, both read, both are foodies, both like to hike, and both of us have the same taste in movies.
For the life of me I don't know why he didn't want to see me again when it was clear he was interested in me.
Any ideas why he did this to me when it was going so well?
Well I've been on dates before that I thought was going great only to get the same response. Sometimes you just have no idea what the other person is feeling.
I don't think she's being really dramatic, she feels rejected, anyone would and its not a good feeling. Sometimes you just meet someone who gets in your head and you can't help it. The upside to this is in a week or two he will be a distant memory since it was only two dates.
I do agree though that his honesty was quite honorable, lots of guys would have just fallen off the face of the earth with no explanation, instead this guy wanted to give her some closure.
Quote:
Originally Posted by oh-eve
i don't think she is overly dramatic.
She is disappointed and she has all right to be. He DID lead her on. They shared intimacy and kissed. She hoped for more because he led her believe it is all great.
However, most guys just disappear without saying anything. OP, you got lucky he even told you.
I have been dropped after 2-9 GREAT dates with NO reason at all, and I am hoping they got in an accident and are still in a coma and therefore couldn't contact me anymore.
Saying you're going to start kissing every guy you meet and you want to be a **** is definitely being over dramatic. And if she's being serious, then that's definitely NOT going to attract the type of man she wants, she's just setting herself up for heartache. I don't see how the guy lead her on after two dates. It's not like he talked about marriage or being in a serious relationship.
Okay thanks guys. When I date I will kiss everyone then since apparently that's what people do.
No, not everyone kiss and hold hands on date one or two, casual or not. Everybody has their own standards, for same I would wonder if evrything appears fine, with no signs of mismatch where the guy seems into me and then next day tells me there is no connection. That is lame, just be glad he is gone sooner.
Saying you're going to start kissing every guy you meet and you want to be a **** is definitely being over dramatic. And if she's being serious, then that's definitely NOT going to attract the type of man she wants, she's just setting herself up for heartache. I don't see how the guy lead her on after two dates. It's not like he talked about marriage or being in a serious relationship.
I doubt she's really gonna start kissing every guy she meets and being ****, she's clearly upset and just saying that out of frustration /disappointment, which I understand, we all say things we don't mean when we're upset.
C'mon the guy lead her on a little, kissing, holding hands as for me Id probably also think he's interested, I mean I'd also be aware there's a possibility Id never hear from him again, cause some guys just act like that. But honestly Im of the believe that kissing and hand holding should be reserved for people you're into. Now if the guy goes in for the kiss and the kiss is bad then I can maybe understand not hearing from him, but he kept kissing her on both dates, if he felt no chemistry why kiss her againf and again???
She is. Now she's basically throwing a fit, with all the "I guess I'll just kiss EVERYbody now since apparently that's how it's done ..." teenage comments.
OP, I think your problem is that you are Looking For The One. If that is the case, you will not approach this process properly. You will come into every date thinking, "Are you the one? Are YOU the ONE????!!!"
As the dates progress, your expectations will be HIGH, as well as your emotional investment, especially if they go pretty well or even SEEM to go well.
RELAX and take your time to get to know people. Learn about how they operate and how to read whether or not they actually like YOU.
She is disappointed and she has all right to be. He DID lead her on. They shared intimacy and kissed. She hoped for more because he led her believe it is all great.
However, most guys just disappear without saying anything. OP, you got lucky he even told you.
I have been dropped after 2-9 GREAT dates with NO reason at all, and I am hoping they got in an accident and are still in a coma and therefore couldn't contact me anymore.
Agree. If he was the one who initiated kiss and holding hands. That is misleading regardless of how many dates.
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It's not like he talked about marriage or being in a serious relationship.