Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
He had to care enough to bring me to work events or around his friends. Just because I am (in other people's words, just being honest) smart and successful and beautiful and "the total package"- one of his friends when meeting me said to him, "u know she's too good for you right?!"- doesn't mean he would've stayed with me just to show me off. I mean he let me move in with him (although he lied about putting my name on lease) . He would occasionally spend time w my family (although both my parents separately said "he was so cold and emotionless towards us" and my mom said "he was like poking fun of your job acting like it was beneath his" and my coworkers at work feel he's done the same around them too). But everyone has flaws. It's not like he was always an a-hole! He just came from a poor 3rd world country and says "I learned at a young age the world is an ugly
Place and love does not conquer all." So that's why I need advice on being patient and showing him I'll love him anyhow
Many people come from third world countries and do NOT behave like this. It's a pathetic excuse.
But I have needs too. After 14 months, wanting to hear "I love you" back and being able to have a general conversation of what he wants for the future & when shouldn't be unreasonable & met with him dumping me. He claims he makes no advance plans bc u never know what future will bring... I don't know if it's because he's not a US citizen and recently had some kind of visa issues that required him to spend a week in Mexico, and he didn't bother to visit his family Once in over 10 years, and his sister was telling me online that she thinks he's forgotten them all. And until I reached out to her online (I asked my ex's permission, saying I wanted to get to know his family bc family's so important to me), she had zero clue who I was. My ex didn't have plans for
Me to meet them and made up excuses why I couldn't come
Once he finally went home this past summer. I asked "is it bc your mom has her own ideas about whom you'll marry or something like that?", and he just started shouting that I was a stupid ignorant American. No, it's because after 2 years he'd told
Me nothing about his family and didnt have any plans for me
To talk to them on phone or Skype or visit them
In perso .
Your "needs" do not matter to your EX, it's just there for you to put pressure on him for things he's not interested in having any part of. Leave the guy alone if you can't get this through your head.
If he wanted no part of it, then why did he say "I'll marry you someday when I decide I'm ready, but the more you want to talk about the future the longer I'll take to propose"? And he came home with me once to see my family. And took me to work parties. And agreed to let me move ib
If he wanted no part of it, then why did he say "I'll marry you someday when I decide I'm ready, but the more you want to talk about the future the longer I'll take to propose"? And he came home with me once to see my family. And took me to work parties. And agreed to let me move ib
Then stop pressuring him to say I love you.
We told you how to get him back. We also think you would be insane to want him back, but that's irrelevant to you.
Is it unreasonable to want someone to love you back? No.
Does he want to love you back? No.
Do you want your needs met or do you want him back? You can't have both.
Id rather have him back as long as I can actually trust that he isn't just stringing me along when he says "I will marry you eventually when I decide the time is right as long as you stop asking/Pressuring me about it. And I have no approximate timetable to give, and if this isn't good enough for you, then do what you have to do & leave."
Id rather have him back as long as I can actually trust that he isn't just stringing me along when he says "I will marry you eventually when I decide the time is right as long as you stop asking/Pressuring me about it. And I have no approximate timetable to give, and if this isn't good enough for you, then do what you have to do & leave."
Id rather have him back as long as I can actually trust that he isn't just stringing me along when he says "I will marry you eventually when I decide the time is right as long as you stop asking/Pressuring me about it. And I have no approximate timetable to give, and if this isn't good enough for you, then do what you have to do & leave."
But he has never strung you along and isn't going to. He flat out told you what to expect. It wasn't and still isn't enough for you. Again, your needs isn't important to him. Why does he have to go out his way to get you to trust that the future you want is viable?
What do you mean? I would think he'd be willing to give some
Sort of general future plan, like "we could start saving via a joint bank account, or get engaged in two years after X and Y, and how about we travel for you to meet
My
Family next summer or fall sometime" instead of just "if this answer isn't good enough for you then leave"
What do you mean? I would think he'd be willing to give some
Sort of general future plan, like "we could start saving via a joint bank account, or get engaged in two years after X and Y, and how about we travel for you to meet
My
Family next summer or fall sometime" instead of just "if this answer isn't good enough for you then leave"
But he isn't willing. He does not want what you want.
What if he did marry you? Then what? You'd be married to someone who doesn't really want you. Do you think that would be a happy situation for you? Do you think he would suddenly start to treat you well? Do you think he would stop the lying and the cheating?
No, don't ever go back to an ex. Unless it ended because of an external factor.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
