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He doesn't like bright lights I think that's what he was trying to show that he's a minimalist and he doesn't have a lot of knick-knacks and crap. I would hate that more.... little Hummel figurines and copper Cattails on the wall and all that other crap people 'decorate' with. He can't paint his walls bright yellow because of his eye problems, so yeah whatever I said that wasn't very nice I take back. I have seen some awful houses before: mold, rot, dirty carpeting, dog pee puddles, 2 feet of standing water in the basement, 80s Wildlife prints, Labrador plates, children... this one isn't awful, he has different taste than most. He just need some flowers. Maybe vines growing on the bars.
C'mon guys. The OP's crib isn't that bad. I know, to most it looks like crap, but I'm sure to him, its paradise.
Maybe, we should ease up on the harsh criticism? No? I didn't think so, this is CD, LOl.
I get this, really, and I apologize to the OP if I've been overly harsh. At the same time, he started this thread to talk about first impressions and expectations in dating, and the state of one's home definitely does fall under this umbrella. You can argue that it shouldn't matter, and yet it does, though the extent which it does varies from person to person. It's not uncommon to see your life through rose colored glasses that a stranger doesn't have.
Last edited by fleetiebelle; 10-10-2017 at 03:48 PM..
I get this, really, and I apologize to the OP if I've been overly harsh. At the same time, he started this thread to talk about first impressions and expectations in dating, and the state of one's home definitely does fall under this umbrella. You can argue that it shouldn't matter, and yet it does, though the extent which it does varies from person to person. It's not uncommon to see your life through rose colored glasses that a stranger doesn't have.
You wrote this a bit earlier:
Quote:
Originally Posted by fleetiebelle
I went back to look at the house picture to see if I wasn't giving OP the benefit of the doubt, but no, my gut feeling is still "noooope." I don't think that he needs to spend major bank on the outside of his house, but I do think it's a blind spot for him. He looks at his house and sees success and financial responsibility, but for internet strangers it really does give off a "Future Crime Scenes of America" vibe.
I quipped about Hannibal Lecter and eating liver with a nice Chianti. I don't know about other people but I feed people into Google to see what pops up. The OP's address would certainly show up since he owns the house. I suspect any woman who did a Google Maps street view would run the other direction.
I get this, really, and I apologize to the OP if I've been overly harsh. At the same time, he started this thread to talk about first impressions and expectations in dating, and the state of one's home definitely does fall under this umbrella. You can argue that it shouldn't matter, and yet it does, though the extent which it does varies from person to person.
I'm not going to argue the exterior of his place looks a bit rough, and the interior could use some help, because it does, IMO. But depending on the woman, she might not have any problems with it.
I guess, the way your home looks (in and out) has rarely been discussed on here to this extent, and how it could severely hinder someone from finding romance/love.
Ive just never known anyone asking what state their home is in before going on a date.
The problem is it looks like a 23-year-old a year into their first real job lives there, not a real adult. It's a crash pad with some "guy stuff". It has a Hannibal Lecter vibe. Are you going to date her or eat her liver with a nice Chianti?
I post photos of my house all the time. I don't live in a mansion. I live in a very modest 992 square foot cottage on a small lot. I telecommuted from it for 7 years. I don't have 'mission control' in the living room. The bicycles aren't in the living room, either. I've spent a lot of hours on landscaping.
Cute house! I like it.
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Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
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Quote:
Originally Posted by hawaiiancoconut
I'm not going to argue the exterior of his place looks a bit rough, and the interior could use some help, because it does, IMO. But depending on the woman, she might not have any problems with it.
I guess, the way your home looks (in and out) has rarely been discussed on here to this extent, and how it could severely hinder someone from finding romance/love.
Ive just never known anyone asking what state their home is in before going on a date.
They probably don't. But we're not talking about just a date, but finding a relationship, and making one's place a comfortable and safe feeling place for others to spend time in it absolutely is a factor in relationship building/forming.
I'm probably going to get drug through the mud for this but someone has to say it....
Guys, I know you all are probably coming from a good place, you're just having a nice discussion, or maybe you all are trying to give the OP some pointers but...after seeing the OP's home getting ragged on for the last few pages and then having someone post a picture of their "nice home" is coming off as "haha look at my house, and look at yours."
It comes off as saying the OP's house is not great compared to yours. AGAIN this probably isn't what you are trying to do but seriously...
It's not cool.
I disagree. It was a very good example of what the OP could do to spruce up a little house on a lot about the same size.
Nobody posted a photo of a posh mansion.
I think people often buy small, affordable places and think "well, it's not a mansion, but it's paid for" as if people who drive by know this.
OP's house looks like he rents it and does the bare minimum with an absentee landlord who doesn't care as long as he gets paid.
That's the image he's projecting to the world when they drive by his house.
Nobody's suggesting he spend a fortune, but for less than a thousand dollars, I guarantee he could dramatically change the exterior appearance of his home and if he DOES meet a girl he likes, she's going to be thinking right away that this is a place where she'd be proud to drive up, park, and go in to see her guy.
Women can always go inside a place and think of a few touches they'd add if they got serious with a boyfriend, but first impressions are everything. And, the place they see when you drive up is a serious first impression.
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He doesn't like bright lights I think that's what he was trying to show that he's a minimalist and he doesn't have a lot of knick-knacks and crap. I would hate that more.... little Hummel figurines and copper Cattails on the wall and all that other crap people 'decorate' with. He can't paint his walls bright yellow because of his eye problems, so yeah whatever I said that wasn't very nice I take back. I have seen some awful houses before: mold, rot, dirty carpeting, dog pee puddles, 2 feet of standing water in the basement, 80s Wildlife prints, Labrador plates, children... this one isn't awful, he has different taste than most. He just need some flowers. Maybe vines growing on the bars.
Yeah. I think it's okay inside... could use maybe a lamp or two in case the woman wants to be able to see without a flashlight, but it's neat. Neat is good.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by hawaiiancoconut
C'mon guys. The OP's crib isn't that bad. I know, to most it looks like crap, but I'm sure to him, its paradise.
Maybe, we should ease up on the harsh criticism? No? I didn't think so, this is CD, LOl.
This is what I'm thinking as well HC, which is why I wrote my post on this thread expounding on the reasons why I feel that his place isn't the Hannibal Lecter house that almost everyone on here has painted it to be.
I see what the others are saying though; yeah, it's dark inside with black curtains and there are bars on the windows...but, like I said in my post, I surmised that once he was in a committed relationship that he would gladly let the lady in his life decorate his place to what appeals to her. And when I read the OP's post towards the end of his thread, it turns out I was right - that he would be more than willing to let his SO give his place 'a woman's touch'.
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