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I asked if you are waiting for marriage. You are...fair enough but I also asked if you two are planning for a wedding. You didn't answer that.
Regardless, you have no say in what he does to amuse himself solo.
If you go weeks without talking to each other then I'd say you don't even have any right to say what he does with somebody.
we don't go weeks without talking. I'll c him once a week and in between that time he wil either message me or I'll message him
So you are saving yourself for your wedding night? Does it bother you that the guy you marry will not have saved himself?
And you are being unfair with this guy. He is not into saving himself. You are not even planning on marrying him - or are you? If you are and you are denying him, you could be setting yourself up for a disgruntled husband.
I knew a guy who's fiance made him wait. He was Ok with that because it was the 'norm' and because he was getting sex from other women while he waited. He did go back to one of his FB but she told him no more because he was married now.
Would you be Ok with that? If not then find someone who also wants to wait till marriage.
well who knows maybe that's what he's trying to find in one of these average women. and saving yourself till marriage even for a guy is not impossible.
and it doesn't bother me becsuse in tis day and age I doubt I would.find a single guy who hasn't done the deed.
Just leave if you’re not happy...you owe one another nothing.
a couple of times I did leave and eventually I thought let me try again and he said to me that apparently I felt guilty for leaving him and so I came back and that he hopes I learnt my lesson .
At first I thought it was all pretty much the guy, and I spoke thusly, gave my advice for that. Said advice still stands.
But the more I read, the more I think you enjoy toying with this guy too, no matter which way the toying is initiated. I suspect you're less interested in this guy himself, more bothered by the notion that he would show interest in any woman but you, despite that even from your side the relationship seems to be kept at arm's length.
Is this a guy you want to keep? Or is this just a point of pride?
if it was just about my pride I wouldn't waste so much time on him. u would have moved on a long time back. its a bit of both but honestly how have I really toyed with him though? he's the main player here. and pretty much has been from the start. back in the day I remember he would enjoy acting busy when I wanted to meet fr example.
At first I thought it was all pretty much the guy, and I spoke thusly, gave my advice for that. Said advice still stands.
But the more I read, the more I think you enjoy toying with this guy too, no matter which way the toying is initiated. I suspect you're less interested in this guy himself, more bothered by the notion that he would show interest in any woman but you, despite that even from your side the relationship seems to be kept at arm's length.
Is this a guy you want to keep? Or is this just a point of pride?
it's kept at arms length from my side too now I guess as I expect hin to do more. I don't want to lay myself out on a plate for him
well who knows maybe that's what he's trying to find in one of these average women. and saving yourself till marriage even for a guy is not impossible.
and it doesn't bother me becsuse in tis day and age I doubt I would.find a single guy who hasn't done the deed.
They are out there, mostly for religious reasons I think. May I ask why you want to save yourself until marriage?
Ok, from what you say, it sounds like this guy really does want you around. It also sounds like you want him around. Plus you've been 'friends' for something like three years now? It seems as though you do not want to move on, otherwise you would not have asked about his following other girls. Have you asked him why he follows these girls? Does he freely let you see what he is doing on IG?
It's weird how OP keeps emphasising on how "average" these women are and how hot she is, while she is the one posting here whining about a guy who is lusting after these women and would not even give her so much as commitment.
It sounds like you're using sex to manipulate this man. People have sex. Doesn't make them easy or a ****. How long have you been having "physical activity" with this guy? A few months? It sounds like you're the easy one by sticking around even though you clearly have feelings for him and he doesn't seem to have as strong feelings. Action speaks louder than words. He doesn't sounds like someone who wants to marry and have babies with you.
You either accept that you're only going to be friends with benefits and don't expect him to behave like a boyfriend, or you talk to him about being an official couple. Or you cut your losses and leave.
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