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People should be showing appreciation to their significant others randomly throughout the year with small gestures. To force people into celebrating Valentine's Day reeks of a contrived social obligation to crass commercialism. Why make men compete to obtain flowers, chocolates and restaurant reservations on one particular day? Seems like a very illogical and impractical social convention to me.
Sometimes people need to take personal responsibility for the crappy situations they end up in. I get you never truly know a person, but if you continuously keep getting involved with crappy people who do nothing but take, some introspection is in order.
As the saying goes: "Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me."
Right?!!
Some people act like they have no say in who they date.
Like they entered some lottery and were given their mates.
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If you can sell it correctly, you can get the woman to agree to a good meal at home and not having to fight a crowd.
I had to sell it to my boyfriend. It’s not his fault though, he has some baggage because he’s divorced because his wife left him. He’s concerned about doing something, “wrong” and losing me too (that’s what he told me). But I have him convinced now that staying home is exactly what I prefer to do on Valentines Day. Seriously. The man is wonderful to me all the time. He doesn’t need to prove anything on one specific day. Others may like to do things on Valentines and that’s good so long as they are happy. No one should feel obligated though.
Some people act like they have no say in who they date.
Like they entered some lottery and were given their mates.
For a lot of men, it's not entirely untrue. Especially such men under 30. They rarely, if ever, have a woman expressing interest in them. And when that finally happens, it becomes a "now or never!" situation in a man's eyes. More often than not, he chooses "now". So when he starts seeing that woman, and she starts demanding Female Worship Day presents, it feels like an inescapable burden on him.
For me, I don't like V-Day because it's too commercialized. People who weren't looking for a relationship all of a sudden want to find a date for V-Day and serenade him/her. These same people have no problem being single the other 364 days, but all of a sudden want a date for V-Day? Come on. Why wait one day out of the year to show love to your spouse when you should be showing them love year round? That's dumb.
I remember as a kid we called it "St Valentines Day". I also remember we brought in cards and walked around the class dropping a card into each bag on a desk.
I didn't mind Valentines Day when I wasn't single but I did not like "Sweetest Day", to me that is a hallmark holiday.
Some people act like they have no say in who they date.
Like they entered some lottery and were given their mates.
Haha, that's amusing to me at this age, but for some of us, that's a pretty close description.
When I was young, no one wanted to date a horribly overtall woman who didn't have much going in the way of looks. I found my "lottery pool" eventually. They were called alcoholics, and they don't care so much if you're unattractive as long as you have a good job and can take care of them. I even got to get married and have a child, things that regular women take for granted will come to them just by snapping their fingers because THEY DO have a say in who they will date.
Yes, of course it would have been better to just remain single and save myself years of heartache, but that's not how it works. This may come as a shock to you, but the homely girls want to be loved just as much as the rest of you do, and sometimes we make poor choices while fooling ourselves into thinking we can have what you simply expect will come your way because you are attractive or even normal-looking. Some of us don't just say we're not going to try because society doesn't find us good enough, although some might do just that.
I was not in a relationship for many years because my post-divorce dating attempts once again verified that alkies, druggies, and crazies were the only partners available to someone like me, and I chose solitude over codependency. Hell, eHarmony even told me that only 3% of the men on the planet would be interested in a woman like me. I am not making this up.
(Then they wanted to know if I wanted to sign up for another 6 months, lol. I declined.)
Now with 60 looming ahead later this year, I find myself surprised by a relationship with someone who bears similar scars in life as relates to having loved and lived with an alcoholic. Looks don't seem to matter as much at this stage in the game. And I am told I am loved every day, so I really don't give a rat's ass about Valentine's Day traditions.
My point, though, is that you are wrong. There are many people out there who have no choices and who are never chosen by anyone. I have friends my age who either rarely dated or like me, only had limited or less-than-desirable choices, who would have loved a shot at a relationship and never got the chance. They had love to give and would have made great partners.
Your experience is not everyone else's. You won a lottery that many were not even given a ticket to enter: You had choices.
Last edited by Mightyqueen801; 02-12-2018 at 06:30 AM..
I did have choices, but on the flip side I had no real drive for marriage or kids, and like being alone, so if I had no romantic interests, I was fine being alone.
My sister on the other hand, who also has no drive for marriage, had a much harder time dating due to being overweight.
But both of us had little toleration for being in unhappy relationships. I do realize that life can be very complicated despite my usual black and white views.
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