Okay, been in two cities now... and Ok Cupid is such a bummer now. (date, boyfriend)
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3-4 years is a bit of time in the dating culture. A lot has changed in just those few years. Like the presence of app-based dating services vs. traditional websites and your particular area/region may have fewer options in your dating pool that fit your criteria.
OKC was by far my favorite site when I was dating. My husband's, too. I haven't the slightest clue what it's like now, but I'm sure it's different in at least some ways.
Well, like I said, I'm also on some niche site called altscene (it was recco'd to me on Reddit... I'm kinda under the impression that it's more of a thing in the UK ) and as small as the user base is here, it mops the floor with Ok Cupid if you're more into the tattoos and weird hair color crowd. It leaves a lot to be desired function-wise, but at least the user base is more my type.
Mod cut.
Last edited by PJSaturn; 05-23-2018 at 09:20 AM..
Reason: Off-topic.
Well, like I said, I'm also on some niche site called altscene (it was recco'd to me on Reddit... I'm kinda under the impression that it's more of a thing in the UK ) and as small as the user base is here, it mops the floor with Ok Cupid if you're more into the tattoos and weird hair color crowd. It leaves a lot to be desired function-wise, but at least the user base is more my type.
[snip]
Are you in the UK? I discovered OKC through an alt/bdsm site. It was full of alt/eccentric/eclectic and "free-spirited" types when I lived in ATL, but ATL has a huge alt community/scene, and there was a mix of traditional sorts and alt/eccentric types in SoCal. NorCal/Bay Area was more similar to the Atlanta scene. But this was years ago before the launch of Tinder and other dating apps. No doubt those apps affected the dynamic and dating culture trends/pool.
Are you in the UK? I discovered OKC through an alt/bdsm site. It was full of alt/eccentric/eclectic and "free-spirited" types when I lived in ATL, but ATL has a huge alt community/scene, and there was a mix of traditional sorts and alt/eccentric types in SoCal. NorCal/Bay Area was more similar to the Atlanta scene.
No. Just that altscene seemed to be more of a UK thing than here in the US.
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But this was years ago before the launch of Tinder and other dating apps. No doubt those apps affected the dynamic and dating culture trends/pool.
'Years ago' being the crux here. Years ago when I used OkC it was exactly as you described. Not to sound like a broken record, but I don't really see where the the crowd we're talking about is really present on Bumble and Tinder. Both seem quite 'young professional' and 'Kardashian fangirl' heavy, and very little else. IME. I'll swipe 'em right, but they ain't swiping this beardo back, haha!
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
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Originally Posted by Eastbound_And_Up
'Years ago' being the crux here. Years ago when I used OkC it was exactly as you described. Not to sound like a broken record, but I don't really see where the the crowd we're talking about is really present on Bumble and Tinder. Both seem quite 'young professional' and 'Kardashian fangirl' heavy, and very little else. IME. I'll swipe 'em right, but they ain't swiping this beardo back, haha!
Those people were on OKC as of 2-3 years ago, not so much 5-6 years ago, but again, I think you're dismissing the filtering that OKC does for you, that Bumble does not. Those people are there, they are just mixed in, and since they're a smaller portion of the population, they don't come around as often, and you don't see much about a person to make a choice.
Plus, and this is a big one too, as we get older the goths, metalheads, kinkster, fetish, alt lifestyle people blend in more. It's less and less about fashion and being outward about their differences, that expression is more (not exclusively, just more) geared toward younger people. That woman in a Talbots outfit very well may be an industrial listening latex wearer on Friday night.
Bumble is an App. Call me old fashioned but I prefer the computer screen to deal with such things as dating etc. The less apps on my phone the better. @Eastbound_and_Up I'd stay away from OKC.....some questionable characters there....I don't know what Tinder is so no comment on that.
"It's Just Lunch" is another thing to consider - one has to pay a fee but they do try to match you up with possible dates.
If you're into kinky stuff you could join FetLife - there are lots of folks who are photographers, or people who like old cemeteries, plus all sorts of sexual fetishes.
Those people were on OKC as of 2-3 years ago, not so much 5-6 years ago, but again, I think you're dismissing the filtering that OKC does for you, that Bumble does not. Those people are there, they are just mixed in, and since they're a smaller portion of the population, they don't come around as often, and you don't see much about a person to make a choice.
I don't know what filtering Ok Cupid might be doing. I just know I've hit the end of the (depressingly short these days) queue, and the options are a lot more PoF than OkC 2014.
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Originally Posted by timberline742
Plus, and this is a big one too, as we get older the goths, metalheads, kinkster, fetish, alt lifestyle people blend in more. It's less and less about fashion and being outward about their differences, that expression is more (not exclusively, just more) geared toward younger people. That woman in a Talbots outfit very well may be an industrial listening latex wearer on Friday night.
True. I have multiple modes myself... buuuuuut just the same, my age range swath is set pretty wide and on the younger end of the sweep, there's nary much of the edgy crowd either. I'm pretty sure Ok Cupid just isn't hip anymore and most of the bleeding edge types were probably the first to go. I mean, I quit it years ago. Only reason I hopped back on is I'm in a new city and I literally know no one here and just wanted to scope out the lay of the proverbial land.
Those people were on OKC as of 2-3 years ago, not so much 5-6 years ago, but again, I think you're dismissing the filtering that OKC does for you, that Bumble does not. Those people are there, they are just mixed in, and since they're a smaller portion of the population, they don't come around as often, and you don't see much about a person to make a choice.
Plus, and this is a big one too, as we get older the goths, metalheads, kinkster, fetish, alt lifestyle people blend in more. It's less and less about fashion and being outward about their differences, that expression is more (not exclusively, just more) geared toward younger people. That woman in a Talbots outfit very well may be an industrial listening latex wearer on Friday night.
For real.
As people grow, they don't always wear their niche interests on their sleeves.
I don't know what filtering Ok Cupid might be doing. I just know I've hit the end of the (depressingly short these days) queue, and the options are a lot more PoF than OkC 2014.
True. I have multiple modes myself... buuuuuut just the same, my age range swath is set pretty wide and on the younger end of the sweep, there's nary much of the edgy crowd either. I'm pretty sure Ok Cupid just isn't hip anymore and most of the bleeding edge types were probably the first to go. I mean, I quit it years ago. Only reason I hopped back on is I'm in a new city and I literally know no one here and just wanted to scope out the lay of the proverbial land.
...you don't see much about a person to make a choice.
Plus, and this is a big one too, as we get older the goths, metalheads, kinkster, fetish, alt lifestyle people blend in more. It's less and less about fashion and being outward about their differences, that expression is more (not exclusively, just more) geared toward younger people. That woman in a Talbots outfit very well may be an industrial listening latex wearer on Friday night.
That's what I'm thinking, there's still an opportunity if one goes about it with the right attitude.
If before I even look I think "might as well surf around OKC, even though these are lamest bunch of future Investigative Discovery leading men...probably listen to polka and are the type to cry when they get mad, mumbling redpillreddit mantras. Sure, they don't have a close-up of their hands, bc they have soft feminine hands! I wont find out until Ive wasted 10 dollars on an app!"Whats the point? That all consuming attitue will eventually come out,and who am I attracting then? The guys I least like.
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) and as small as the user base is here, it mops the floor with Ok Cupid if you're more into the tattoos and weird hair color crowd. It leaves a lot to be desired function-wise, but at least the user base is more my type. 
