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It's OK to be rude to people who are trying to take advantage of you. Notice that they have no reciprocal concern about being a "nice" bf, You need to be firm, then stop going out with them, and block them.
I like the response one poster gave, "Why would you need my money? I'm not an ATM", or better, "Why are you asking me for money? I'm barely covering my expenses and student loans. I was going to ask you for some help, actually, but I thought that would be too rude."
Another option, "Oh, I'm sorry to hear you're not able to live within your means. I'm looking for a guy who's practical and a good money manager, like me. I'm afraid you and I aren't compatible."
Being "nice" to people out to use you can put you at risk for you financial, or even physical, safety. It's bad programming you've absorbed from parents/society, that women are supposed to be doormats, and always "nice". It's dangerous programming. Learn to stand up for yourself and to draw boundaries. Your life could depend on it, someday. If you need to, get a few counseling sessions on this, so you can role-play with the counselor, and practice saying "no", and dealing with manipulative scenarios. Or find a workshop on "Assertiveness Training".
I don’t know then when time comes to ask for my money back they block ignore me insult me curse me twice I had to let the money go and am now dealing with another case trying get back
Why do you say "yes" and on average, how much money are you loaning these men?
It’s to be nice u date a girl u want to know if she would be their for u during hard times I loaned $300 another time $1742 another time $830 different guys
Hate to break it to ya but you're an easy mark. Toughen up girlie and stop dating guys from work. Your reputation has been sealed.
These guys don’t know each other none of my exes know each other I dated one guy from work then went work else where months years later and meet someone else not date all guys from same work wtf
It’s to be nice u date a girl u want to know if she would be their for u during hard times I loaned $300 another time $1742 another time $830 different guys
You need to date higher quality men who have their lives together and learn to say "no" when asked for money.
At those high dollar amounts is sounds as if you were helping with either rent, insurance, and/or child support payments--none of which are your problem as a girlfriend (especially if you were being hit up for cash early on in these relationships as you mentioned in your original post).
Last edited by Formerly Known As Twenty; 09-12-2019 at 05:14 AM..
Perhaps some men these days feel women "owe" them.
I don't see that in this situation. I think it's more a matter of these particular men being lowlifes who operate like this. It's probably not the only bad behavior they display.
Just because they're employed, doesn't mean they aren't from a bad element. I'd be interested to know what these men's jobs are.
Stop dating people from your work. Or as the saying goes, don't poop where you eat.
So u want to know that when ur down u don’t want to know if the person ur dating would stand by u be their u help u
So would THEY stand by YOU? or does it just go one way? And you should probably be dating a while longer before the "Would you help me when I am down" question comes up.
Like Judge Judy says in cases like this, Don't they have parents? friends? siblings? Why are they taking money from YOU?
It’s to be nice u date a girl u want to know if she would be their for u during hard times I loaned $300 another time $1742 another time $830 different guys
Do you have money to give like that? Wow! Do you go lacking for the month when you hand out that kind of cash? If you have that kind of overflow, couldn't that money go in your savings for YOUR hard times?
Do you have money to give like that? Wow! Do you go lacking for the month when you hand out that kind of cash? If you have that kind of overflow, couldn't that money go in your savings for YOUR hard times?
Or you can date me. Just kidding.
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Just kidding.
