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For what reasons are they borrowing money from you in such large amounts?
Pay for things like their designing clothes someone has make them and they don’t have enough so have borrow
Another was for rent cause he had to move out another was because he owed someone money and asked me help
Wow have been away from the relationship section too long, I see there are still humorous threads being made.
So let me ask.
1 how many tattoos on average does your guys have and if so of what?
2 criminal records?
3 drug or drinking habits?
4 are they amazing unbelievable hot guys who are use to having their way with a harem on tap?
5 are they use to sleeping in everyday?
6 long history of short term employment?
7 do they do telemarketing by day and a musician at night? I'm a musician btw and yes many musicians are like that. They would rather struggle and be free to make music hoping to pay rent with a next gig. I'm not that way.
I mean I wanted to be nice gf and show I care and am supportive but no I didn’t
If you are a couple of days, couple of weeks into a relationship, you are NOT their girlfriend yet. Tell them NO and move on. Find and take an assertiveness training course given locally.
Pay for things like their designing clothes someone has make them and they don’t have enough so have borrow
Another was for rent cause he had to move out another was because he owed someone money and asked me help
Assuming that these were three different men (heck, even if were the same man using you as his personal ATM), I'd say that you need to adjust your picker and, most importantly, know that "no" is a complete sentence and use the word liberally.
Sometimes, the most loving thing you can for a person is force him/her to stand on his/her own two feet and, in the case of man who borrowed money for clothes, teaching him to differentiate between "wants" and "needs" on his own dime--not yours.
At the end of the day, this isn't a "man" problem, but a "you" problem in terms of placing and maintaing boundaries even within the confines of a relationship.
Consider any monies that you loaned to these men lost (or if you're feeling generous, as gifts) and internalize the lessons that you have learned about loaning people money.
If you are a couple of days, couple of weeks into a relationship, you are NOT their girlfriend yet. Tell them NO and move on. Find and take an assertiveness training course given locally.
Read the OP's earlier posts. She says these were relationships of 6 months or more. One was.2 years, I think she said, IDK.
I’ve dated about 4 guys and they have all asked me for money even when just starting the relationship couple days weeks into the relationship they ask for money I don’t know maybe it’s me that attracts these types of men but they have jobs and that’s how met at work
Her opening post states that the guys ask for money within days/weeks of starting the relationship.
Her opening post states that the guys ask for money within days/weeks of starting the relationship.
Thank you for clarifying this. She said something different, later in the thread. This is strange.
OP, what does it mean, "a couple of days or weeks into the relationship"? Do you mean, a couple of days or weeks into dating? A few dates is not a relationship. Or do you mean, after the dating has progressed, and developed into a relationship?
If someone asks you for money within the first few dates, or first few weeks of dating, that's inappropriate on their part, and a bit strange. You don't even know the guys very well at this point. There's no need to be "supportive" when you're in the early getting-acquainted stage. Why would you want to "be supportive" of someone you hardly know? This doesn't make sense.
Are you having sex with them after the first couple of dates, and giving them money, too? They really are taking. you to the cleaners, if that's true.
Wow have been away from the relationship section too long, I see there are still humorous threads being made.
So let me ask.
1 how many tattoos on average does your guys have and if so of what?
2 criminal records?
3 drug or drinking habits?
4 are they amazing unbelievable hot guys who are use to having their way with a harem on tap?
5 are they use to sleeping in everyday?
6 long history of short term employment?
7 do they do telemarketing by day and a musician at night? I'm a musician btw and yes many musicians are like that. They would rather struggle and be free to make music hoping to pay rent with a next gig. I'm not that way.
No to all questions
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