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I see that there are a lot of people blaming the boys for most of this, which I find wrong.
I'm a 20 year old male, *used* have several female friends, I show interest and get shot down or screw up or whatever.. but I'm not promiscuous, not expecting to get laid every time I'm out with females/other friends, etc. Are you saying that I'm to blame for the behaviour that is ingrained into the minds of my generation since the time we were SIX? It's not just one gender, it's both.
Just because we are influenced by sex at an earlier age than we used to be doesn't mean we don't have our own free will. Sure, not enough attention from Daddy or MTV or bad female role models may play a part, but you are talking about girls at an age where they are forming much of their own personality, making their own opinions, and opening their eyes to the world around them.
I saw many "good girls" go bad, and many "bad girls" do complete 180s in high school. It was always interesting to watch.
I see that there are a lot of people blaming the boys for most of this, which I find wrong.
I agree with you but for most of the posters on this site, its the closest thing to gender equity that they will agree with. (They sure didn't waste any time with this approach!) However, barring rape and date rape drugs, this is one thing that young women have complete control over.
In contrast, young men fall into three categories:
- those who will take what they can get and usually get a lot.
- those who will not risk their future.
- the majority (including nearly all the good students) who these girls are not interested in, even in the slightest.
However, one thing these girls can't and don't control is their "need" to attract the boys who will give them status and who they perceive, due to their inexperience, to be the best catches. Many are well aware that their attractiveness is very fleeting and likely won't last far into their 20s. (They can look at their mother's wedding photos, after all)
If they want to attract the jocks and boys from well to do families, there is little time to waste and certainly no time for an education. Birth control is now optional, since there is little shame in making a mistake anymore and they might snag lucrative child support, even if he won't marry them.
People who look to "old fashion morality" to end this are hopelessly out of touch. Its the incentives and lack of any obvious immediate downside to this behavior that causes it to thrive, even in supposedly "good christian homes". Ask Sarah Palin.
It's been like this for generations. People looking at the flapper girls of the 30's showing ankle, to the "filthy" dancing of elvis in the 50's, the free love flower power of the 60's to the big hair glam metal groupies of the 80's and so on. Sluts will be sluts, always have been, always will be.
The problem is, it is now more socially acceptable than it has ever been before.
I am a bookworm. While there is little interest in our society in anything that was written before, say, 1920, I find the writings of "premoderns" absolutely fascinating. What ancient Greeks wrote, and what ancient Romans wrote, and what medieval scholars wrote, and what humanists wrote -- it's riveting not just for what their writings reveal about their world, but for what they reveal about ourselves. And the one constant in social commentary that I see again and again, self-perpetuating for thousands of years, since the time of ancient Sumer (whose founding religious myth centered on a teenage girl disobeying her mother, acting immodestly, and getting raped by a god) is this intense hand-wringing about young people, and especially young women, getting sluttier and more spoiled, and not getting punished enough for having a good time. Surly ancient moralists sound remarkably similar to today's busybodies. Cato the Elder, foaming at the mouth about matronly virtues going to hell in a merry striped cloak, would feel right at home in a middle-American suburb, worried sick about teenage girls losing their virginity without getting any "security" in return.
I am not saying that teenage promiscuity is not a problem, or that a parent whose children are exposed to sexualized programming should not be worried. But, contrary to what the OP is arguing, the single most reliable predictor of teenage "sluttiness" is social class, and that has always been true. There was a time when there was no TV with its R-rated movies, but there was also a time when most families lived in one room, and the parents did their thing right there in the presence of small children (it's true). There were always bad role models, there was always frisky entertainment (let me tell you, when it comes to filth, Britney's got nothing on Geoffrey Chaucer) and there were always powerful dangerous influences. But, a teenager who is looking at an Ivy League school and an illustrious career, or a promising and exciting future in some other form, isn't going to jeopardize all that for a nookie (and -- not to offend those who believe in Grand-Canyon-sized differences between men and women -- men too, even teenage boys, are perfectly capable of self-control when it's in their interest to exercise it). By contrast, a teenager who looks at her parents and sees that the limit of their world is reflexive, impoverished parenthood and the highlight of their lives is pathetic high school popularity, will probably **** a lot, and engage in other forms of attention-seeking behavior. I mean, what else is there? It's not getting worse -- it's just as bad as it's always been. Regrettable in individual cases, but hardly an end to civilization.
Tell me why I should care as long as they're not making babies or catching/spreading STDs. I'm up for any reasonable argument that's not religiously based.
How about the fact a young lady/woman/girl should have more self-respect then to spread her legs for every guy/girl they come across?..
Or the self respect to wait until they are out of the high school scene and actually understand what being RESPONSIBLE means. (Generally speaking as I know MANY teenagers are very responsible when it comes to themselves and their decisions/actions)
The problem is, it is now more socially acceptable than it has ever been before.
Exaactly.. when I was 20 I wore a size 14 in LITTLE GIRLS.. I hated it because everything was cute and flowery and LITTLE GIRLish.. Now its just the same as the young teeny bopper clothing... "here.. look at my bum.. aren't I SOOO CUTE".. I actually find it highly disturbing!
Yeah, do you know what the sex education from the parents consisted of regarding the teen girl who got pregnant?
"Don't have sex."
They didn't arm her with the pill or any info, they just told her not to have sex.
Parents pretending that sex isn't a realistic option for their kids because they don't feel comfortable talking about it end up with pregnant kids.
How do you make parents help their kids to be prepared? You can't. Pretending that everyone is going to make sure their kids have everything they need to handle their emerging sexuality is naive.
The problem is, it is now more socially acceptable than it has ever been before.
Exactly. When I was younger you didnt see all the tampon/pad commercials on tv, you didnt see bra & underwear commercials or the ED commercials. Things that were unspeakable of then, is now. Sadly there is no innocence of being a child anymore.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Itz
Exaactly.. when I was 20 I wore a size 14 in LITTLE GIRLS.. I hated it because everything was cute and flowery and LITTLE GIRLish.. Now its just the same as the young teeny bopper clothing... "here.. look at my bum.. aren't I SOOO CUTE".. I actually find it highly disturbing!
lol, so you're saying you have better odds not giving them ANY contraceptives?
I guess I am saying that teenagers are a bit impulsive and not so responsible. Goes with maturing.
I would rather a guy have protection for the occasional romp than a young girl putting hormones into her still developing body.
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