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As a woman, I was always wondering: What do men really think about the whole engagement ring tradition? I've been reading on a female wedding/engagement board for a while and it seems like that most women want their man to spend thousands of dollars on an engagement ring. On top of that, there are several who complain that she doesn't like the ring and they need to change it for another one, or she wants to pick one herself. And, of course, it HAS to be a diamond (because DeBeers says you have to have a diamond *eyeroll*).
I don't know, maybe it's because I'm not from the US, but I find this whole thing ridiculous and I wonder how many guys are actually out there who find this perfectly normal. If I was a man, I would NEVER spend thousands of Dollars on a ring. If she wants a ring fine, why not, but for sure not something that expensive. If she wants something more expensive, why doesn't she buy it herself? I'm not judging anyone who is very much into jewelry and therefore wants a more expensive piece, but why not buy it yourself then? I could name at least a hundred things I'd rather spend 5000 bucks on than a ring. And I would never expect a man to buy me an expensive ring. If he wants to spend a couple of thousand bucks on me, I'd tell him invest that in our honeymoon, other trips or use it as a downpayment for an apartment or so.
Men, I'd love to hear your opinion on this. What do you think about expensive engagement ring? Did you get one for your wife? Will you get one for your future wife? Will you get one only because SHE wants it or what's the reasoning behind this?
Thanks!
1. My dad bought my mom very expensive jewelries in the past because my mom loves jewelries.
2. My older brother bought my sister in law pretty expensive wedding ring, I don't think he bought her engagement ring.
3. My other older brother bought his wife a nice engagement ring and a wedding ring because these are what she wanted. She also wanted big wedding because this is her childhood dream.
To me, I don't care for engagement ring, I just want a simple wedding ring. I am not a big jewelry person.
So I guess it all depends on your comfort level and if you guys can afford it.
My son (in his 40's, never married, no children) recently got engaged to a woman (mid 30's, divorced, one child). I was surprised they went the engagement ring route. It was $8K and she kicked in $2K. I would think at their age and her having done the ring, big wedding, etc. thing one that they would not do the "traditional" engagement ring thingy.
My son (in his 40's, never married, no children) recently got engaged to a woman (mid 30's, divorced, one child). I was surprised they went the engagement ring route. It was $8K and she kicked in $2K. I would think at their age and her having done the ring, big wedding, etc. thing one that they would not do the "traditional" engagement ring thingy.
I just said wonderful to them. Lovely ring.
I have to confess being surprised when people have big weddings, etc. when one or both have been married before - but then I have to remind myself that wanting this to be a joyous and celebrated occasion makes sense. Just because someone is older or has been married before doesn't make getting married to the person that you want to spend the rest of your life with any less joyful.
Personally, I'm more p$&@ed at the desperate guys who do this crap. I don't wear or believe in wearing jewelry for practical reasons and I ever decided to marry a woman I'd have to waste money on something that can easily be stolen by a pickpocket and very easy to lose or else she will likely restive to marry me thanks to societal expectation.
I don't think that the "desperate" guys really care that you are mad at them. What a strange thing to be mad about. And for the record, most smart people have their jewelry insured.
As a woman, I was always wondering: What do men really think about the whole engagement ring tradition? I've been reading on a female wedding/engagement board for a while and it seems like that most women want their man to spend thousands of dollars on an engagement ring.
Thanks!
Yeah, I bet women posting on an engagement/wedding board are all about the bling bling.
Self-selected party queens.
So many women I know (many of whom are richie rich rich) don't give two figs about wasting money on jewelry. And that their awesome man is worth more than his weight in diamonds.
Yeah, I bet women posting on an engagement/wedding board are all about the bling bling.
Self-selected party queens.
So many women I know (many of whom are richie rich rich) don't give two figs about wasting money on jewelry. And that their awesome man is worth more than his weight in diamonds.
And... some women who are wealthy DO like fine jewelry.
Some women who are wealthy like sports cars. Some don't care about that stuff at all.
Some of them like art, furniture, etc. Some would rather be outdoors in a tent.
Some are into sports. Some hate sports.
There is no universal answer.
I think the safest thing to say about this issue, and any other one where money is involved, is to buy what you can afford that you WANT. And for couples to be on the same page.
Do I think everyone is supposed to like what I like?
Hell, no.
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I have to confess being surprised when people have big weddings, etc. when one or both have been married before - but then I have to remind myself that wanting this to be a joyous and celebrated occasion makes sense. Just because someone is older or has been married before doesn't make getting married to the person that you want to spend the rest of your life with any less joyful.
There will not be a big, formal wedding. A small family affair at the most. Even than, the engagement ring thingy threw me.
And... some women who are wealthy DO like fine jewelry.
Some women who are wealthy like sports cars. Some don't care about that stuff at all.
Some of them like art, furniture, etc. Some would rather be outdoors in a tent.
Some are into sports. Some hate sports.
There is no universal answer.
I think the safest thing to say about this issue, and any other one where money is involved, is to buy what you can afford that you WANT. And for couples to be on the same page.
Do I think everyone is supposed to like what I like?
Hell, no.
I agree with all of this.
My point is that if you go to a forum where people are obsessed with the whole party-bling culture, you will select for women who will disproportionately say they are into the ring.
My point is that if you go to a forum where people are obsessed with the whole party-blind culture, you will select for women who will disproportionately say they are into the ring.
I absolutely agree.
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