Quote:
Originally Posted by Ilene Wright
I went to Bible study!!   Why? I don't know really, it seemed to be the right thing to do and I haven't been doing much of that lately. Something is not right here and I've got to get to the bottom of it. Since becoming agnostic and losing my faith my world has crumbled into ruins....I mean it's really really bad. I can't go into detail but it's sending me back to take another look at why this is happening. Is there a God and if there is, is he trying to tell me something? WHAT!!??
When I was a Christian I had such strong faith, it was unshakable. |
Ilene, I want to respond but I need to point some things out first. I am not being nit-picky, but rather I'm trying to get you to see what I see from your words. thereby you can know why i'm saying what i'm saying...
You say that
Since becoming agnostic and losing my faith ... and then in the next paragraph you say, you had
such strong faith, it was unshakable.
Well, i see this as an issue. It was obviously shakable. You lost your faith. Unshakeable means you will not lose it.
Psalm 62:6
He only is my rock and my salvation, My stronghold; I shall not be shaken.
Sometimes i think we want to think what we have is incorruptable... but oftentimes we find the adverse is true. Ilene, Peter is a great example of someone who found, many times in fact, that his faith was not what he thought it was. There is nothing wrong with that. It is something we all go through. You are not alone.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ilene Wright
How do I get that back when the Bible seems so incredulous to me now? I even think I actually have become atheist because I stopped believing in God completely. Where do I go from here? Am I crazy? Not that I ever had a charmed life or anything before I became agnostic but it sure was better than this.
I felt comfortable tonight and at ease. I always enjoyed Bible study but I wanted to blurt out "hey! There's an atheist amongst you!!" and see the shock and horror on their faces. But I didn't. I just listened.
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When i read this i smiled. because something very similar happened to me while i was teaching my teen class one wednesday night. a young girl in my class is really good about inviting people she knows to church. The visitor was very courteous and attentive, but i asked a question to the class (can't remember the question), but no one answered at first. i asked her directly, because she seemed like she had something to say... and she said, "I'm an atheist."
well as you might imagine, my lesson was over and i was off and running on this. I said, "well, then you are in the right place."
she had never told anyone in such a public place. she said she wanted to tell her parents but couldn't... and that being in a class with a bunch of people she didn't know actually made it easier. the girl that brought her was embarrassed after class and I told her not to be. Christ came to seek and save the lost and that is EVERYBODY. I never saw the girl since. I tried to friend request her on facebook but nothing yet.
You should have said something. I think that since you say you wanted to proclaim it, you wanted them to know. "to see the shock on their faces"... I'm not really sure that's why you wanted to...
I may be off-script here, but if you were a strong atheist, i'd have no problem believing that... but since you went to this bible study because it seemed like the right thing to do... that seems a little self-defeating. I think, based on what you say, that you wanted to say that so they could offer help. The fact that you didn't tells me that you are not ready for their help yet. You are waiting for the answer for yourself and posting here. Again... if i am wrong, then i deeply appologize. Please don't think me rude, Ilene.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ilene Wright
I guess I was waiting for a "sign" or some tiny little inkling that God actually does exist and he actually cares what happens to me. Didn't happen. I actually long for the days of the ignorant bliss of being a believer. What will it take to convince me?
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This sounds like an atheist statement to me, given my experience with them. Richarddawkins.net and personal face-to-face. They want a sign of God's power, existence, etc.
John 20:24 But Thomas, one of the twelve, called Didymus, was not with them when Jesus came. 25 So the other disciples were saying to him, “We have seen the Lord!†But he said to them,
“Unless I see in His hands the imprint of the nails, and put my finger into the place of the nails, and put my hand into His side, I will not believe.â€
The atheists i talk to are offended when i compare them to an apostle. now, i know that Thomas was an apostle and thereby a great man and Christian, but he is also a great example of one wanting a sign to validate a belief.
26 After eight days His disciples were again inside, and Thomas with them. Jesus *came, the doors having been shut, and stood in their midst and said, “Peace
be with you.†27 Then He *said to Thomas, “Reach here with your finger, and see My hands; and reach here your hand and put it into My side; and do not be unbelieving, but believing.†28 Thomas answered and said to Him, “My Lord and my God!â€
29 Jesus *said to him, “Because you have seen Me, have you believed? Blessed are they who did not see, and yet believed.â€
i hope you do not wait for a sign... They are not coming. the next sign will be accompanied with trumpets.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ilene Wright
My prayers never ever got answered in the past but I have to say that as a believer life was better and more settled. Now it's just a whirlwind of heartache and disaster that has nearly put me over the edge.
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believers don't look at God as a support system to make them feel better. God isn't an ATM machine that better not be overdrawn or i'm switching banks. There is Joy in Christ, but that Joy comes after the tribulations we go through here. Don't ever let anyone tell you that Christians are happy all the time and never have problems. I'm sure you realize that that is not true. like you said, you didn't have a charmed life... me neither. But even when the trials get me down, i know the promises of God. And the faith...
Eph 6:16 ...taking up the shield of faith with which you will be able to extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one.
The shield is the part that takes the most abuse. It needs to be strong. I think you want that. I think that's why you went to the bible study. I think you were looking for a way back in. I think you were there to see if there was something there for you. And if you shield has taken so much abuse that you can barely keep ahold of it... It might be time to start swinging the sword. to me, that is why the bible study seemed like the right thing to do.
Eph 6:17... sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ilene Wright
I'm not a very good agnostic/atheist I guess.
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you can't be both. from what you have written, i think you are an agnostic... now for me to say you are a good agnostic, might sound like a crazy thing, but you are a fine agnostic. you are in the middle... unsure which is right. that's what agnosticism is. You are not an atheist. You may be one day, but not when you posted this...
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ilene Wright
I don't even know why I'm posting this, just thought it was sorta weird that I went to bible study. And I don't really know what I expect from you guys as far as responses because I'm at a loss myself. Maybe you could use your little prayer magic and give me some answers?
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Prayer is not magic. it is statements like this that make me think that you are leaning toward atheism. I'd like to help, but also am not sure what you need from me or anyone. I'm confused if you are wanting help to keep you from going farther toward atheism, or not.
one more time, if i have mis-interpreted your wording, i am very sorry. I hope you forgive me if i have. I am willing to talk further. and I will pray for you, but there will be no magic involved.
adam.
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