My brother needs $3500 to turn the power back on! (wife, father, husband)
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My brother is in financial trouble and now he needs $3500 to turn the power back on in his home.
He had not paid the bill over the longest time and got a winter hardship while they could not shut off his power due to the cold weather law. With penalties it is now $3500 to turn the power back on.
Last time he got into financial trouble he nearly lost his only family car when the bank said he has a few hours to catch up on his payments or they would tow the car away.
Growing up I never had anything to do with this brother. Now as an adult he generally does not speak to me and he lives 400 miles away so we only see each other on Christmas. I don't remember ever having a real conversation with him.
When he borrowed money from me last time he stopped paying me after a few small payments and would not acknowledge me when I asked him about his debt.
Now that he needs even more money he is smart enough to not ask me directly, he has our father to do the dirty work. My father said I owe him help because he is desperate and I am the only person who has the money in the family to save his family of five from living in the dark.
Do I really owe it to him to bail him out again because he is family and my wife and I have money?
Struck it rich! Do you owe anything to family or friends?
My husband got quite a bit of money due to the death of a close family member. Now we have friends and family that we never knew we had. People that were cold to us when we were middle class now want to be our best buds! We are hearing lots of hard luck stories.
If you got millions in the lottery or through an inheritance do you think it is fair and right to give part of it to your parents and brothers and sisters and maybe your best friends? Or your adult children? If so, what percent of your windfall?
If it makes you happy, give to whomever you wish. If you feel used, or feel like you are buying your popularity, then back off.
I have 2 daughter, nether one of which have any monetary sense. So I set up a trust fund for them. They will not be inheriting a lump sum, but they will be taken care of.
My brother is in financial trouble and now he needs $3500 to turn the power back on in his home.
He had not paid the bill over the longest time and got a winter hardship while they could not shut off his power due to the cold weather law. With penalties it is now $3500 to turn the power back on.
Last time he got into financial trouble he nearly lost his only family car when the bank said he has a few hours to catch up on his payments or they would tow the car away.
Growing up I never had anything to do with this brother. Now as an adult he generally does not speak to me and he lives 400 miles away so we only see each other on Christmas. I don't remember ever having a real conversation with him.
When he borrowed money from me last time he stopped paying me after a few small payments and would not acknowledge me when I asked him about his debt.
Now that he needs even more money he is smart enough to not ask me directly, he has our father to do the dirty work. My father said I owe him help because he is desperate and I am the only person who has the money in the family to save his family of five from living in the dark.
Do I really owe it to him to bail him out again because he is family and my wife and I have money?
WTH? I would've pointed out to your dad that you did loan him money that he never did pay off. That alone would void any obligation of loaning. Besides, that brother has issues that stems beyond being in the dark. Your 3500 dollars isn't going to help the brother at all, he'll just get himself into another debt that will also need to be paid off by someone else. He needs to go live with your father since obviously your father is feeling "generous".
Are you the same young man that was asked to bail him out of losing his home last year?
Regardless. No, you do not owe it to your Dad, or your brother to fork over the payment for his utilities. He got himself in trouble.
If your Dad is emotionally blackmailing you regarding guilting you into paying your brothers debts, than it is time to put some space between your Dad and you for a time.
Let your brother take care of himself. If you don't let yourself be blackmailed into rescuing him, he'll have to figure it out...Or he will lean on your Dad. That would actually be a good thing, because your Dad might wake up himself and recognize that your Brother is irresponsible....and lay off of you.
The truth is, your brother has not learned his lessons, he keeps getting himself into financial binds through his own bad habits. This is neither your responsibility nor your problem. don't allow others to put this on you.
My husband (inherited)... do you think it is fair and right to give part of it to your parents
and brothers and sisters and maybe your best friends? Or your adult children?
Limiting my answer to this Q only...
I'll say that your obligation is only to your lineal descendants.
If rich uncle Harry wanted the others to share he w/could have done that.
Beyond that limitation... if one is aware of X then one has a responsibility to X.
How much, where, when, how... gets sticky.
You would be a fool to help this loser out. No way.
If your father wants to continue enabling this irresponsible behavior on your brother's part - his business. Dragging you into it is just WRONG on so many levels!!!!
If you do it just to keep family harmony, then not only has your family succumbed to extortionist tactics, but you have succumbed to allowing yourself to be emotionally blackmailed.
NO WAY. Let the dude live in a tent. Or in the car he managed to keep from getting repossessed by bumming money off relatives.
He still owes you money!!!
SHAME ON YOUR FATHER for trying to guilt you into this sad bit of economic drama.
I can see this potentially happening in my family. My mom bails my brother out from time to time, not because he doesn't have money to pay his debts, but because he doesn't want to. My parents have money.
You don't owe anyone anything, family or not. You know your brother won't be there for you. Tell your dad to get real and to tell your brother he needs to figure out his life, like you did yours. In my experience, these people find a way always...either he'll get someone else to give him the money, or he'll figure something out.
I find it fascinating that you posted them at almost exactly the same time.
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Struck it rich! Do you owe anything to family or friends?
