Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I can understand the Phoenix area being as you say. Every home seems to be walled in. Drive into the garage and then there is a door that leads into the house, that leads to a walled in Patio. You never see neighbours or anyone for that matter.
Our neighbours in our suburb of Phoenix visibly cringe and look like they’re going to poop themselves when we wave or say hi. We have no clue who they are or even look like ,except the immediate neighbour who coincidentally is from the Midwest. The man Opposite us tries to not look at us at all . Never had that Happen in any of the other states we have lived. It’s not like we are bored and desperate to be chatty. However on the hiking trails and the paved trails we have found most fellow walkers or hikers smile and say hi back.
We are moving back to the Midwest next year and I look forward to people being comfortable saying hi without fearing a lifetime commitment to chatting. The two times we’ve lived in the Midwest neighbours made a point of knowing your name and number so in emergencies we could watch out for each other or contact if necessary.
This is the second post I've seen today bashing Phoenix people.
I figured with all of that sunshine and warm weather, people would be happier than they are in the midwest with the long dragged out winters.
Phoenix is on my short list of places I'd consider moving to but I may have to reconsider.
Perhaps a warmer climate is not what it's cut out to be.
I thought about this some more and I can see some of us might not be in the mood to do more than smile and wave hello especially if the other person is a chatterbox and a droner. I went out for a quick 20 minute walk last night before dinner and it was cold out and getting near dark and I wanted to get home to eat dinner. I do not like to be hijacked while I'm in a hurry to walk and get home. That's just the way it is.
This is the problem. You never know when you're going to run into one of those. You can't take good conversation for granted. You appreciate it when you have it, but you can't assume any random neighbor or person you come across in life is capable of a genuine exchange.
What you wrote is one thing I don't miss about the West. I live in the SE now, and while our neighbors aren't friendly (because let's just say, they are very different than us) the general area is very chatty and friendly - in stores, in offices, at the park, etc. We wave with one set of neighbors. It's a small town so there's a connection there with professional services. I love the more laid back openness and chattiness of the South.
My experience in the Bay Area is of friendly people who enjoy a friendly chat. It's not quite like the South, where it's everywhere, but it's not unusual for people to be friendly, when you cross paths with them while walking through the neighborhood, or when waiting in line for the cashier. That may be less true now, with so many transplants from out-of-state, but I've always thought of California as friendly.
The south is not as chatty as its reputation once was. Not with the influx of transplants, and in Florida all the retirement communities. I have met far to many retirees down here, that will call you if the want something. However if you see them outside they quickly turn and go inside because they assume your going to say hi. Or if you call them on the phone they won't answer. I have even had one of these neighbour's call me one day. She wanted me to call a friend of hers in her home state on her phone. Reason for this is the friend wanted to visit my neighbor while on her way to take a cruise. My neighbor wanted me to tell the friend she was calling the wrong number.
I've see far to much of this extreme unfriendliness in the South. In fairness to the South the people I'm coming in contact with are seniors. They are from all over and I've learned many seniors sadly are not all warm chatty or respectful people. It actually has turned me off, especially the neighbour I mentioned which I refused to call her friend and be that mean to someone.
Oh, I agree. I think that's modern life, though. People are all wrapped up in their phones, their online games, their entertainment, and then there is the rest of their usually complicated lives - no matter where they live. I live in a small town so naturally it's friendlier. When I go to Huntsville, it is amazing how much it's like the West. Even the accents are barely discernable compared to where I live not very far away.
As for California, I should have qualified my statements to say that overall, Northern California is friendlier than Southern California. I think a lot of that is due to sheer size and demographics. People spend so much time in their vehicles it's sad. People spend so much time living in the anthill they become morel insular. I haven't lived in the Bay Area for 23 years now (lived there for 17 years), and I'm sure it's changed, but I suspect that it is still friendlier than Southern California (where I'm from).
This is the second post I've seen today bashing Phoenix people.
I figured with all of that sunshine and warm weather, people would be happier than they are in the midwest with the long dragged out winters.
Phoenix is on my short list of places I'd consider moving to but I may have to reconsider.
Perhaps a warmer climate is not what it's cut out to be.
I can’t bash all Phoenix because I have no experience living in other neighbourhoods , so I can only state my experience in MY neighbourhood. The same can be said of the people, I can only relay about the people in my neighbourhood. I really can’t figure out what the root is. I’ve lived in two countries, cities , towns, villages and suburbs and some are friendlier than others but I’ve never been around a neighbourhood where neighbours who visibly cringe when you try to say hi or desperately try to avoid eye contact . After almost 5 years of it I am done.
Our neighbours in our suburb of Phoenix visibly cringe and look like they’re going to poop themselves when we wave or say hi. We have no clue who they are or even look like ,except the immediate neighbour who coincidentally is from the Midwest. The man Opposite us tries to not look at us at all . Never had that Happen in any of the other states we have lived. It’s not like we are bored and desperate to be chatty. However on the hiking trails and the paved trails we have found most fellow walkers or hikers smile and say hi back.
We are moving back to the Midwest next year and I look forward to people being comfortable saying hi without fearing a lifetime commitment to chatting. The two times we’ve lived in the Midwest neighbours made a point of knowing your name and number so in emergencies we could watch out for each other or contact if necessary.
Do you mind saying what area you are in? When I've traveled the roads through the 'burbs of Phoenix I hardly ever see anyone outside their house, walking on the sidewalks or even riding bikes in certain areas. It's like a ghost town driving through. I'm speaking of Gilbert which I drove through to get to Cosmo Dog/Water Park in Gilbert by the 202. Most suburbs are like that, though.
I still think it's modern life. And to a certain extent the impersonal West. Being from there I was used to it. but now that I live in the SE I feel the difference.
I do think it's possible you've gotten into an area with some real snobs or fearful people. I've lived in some snobby areas myself. But mostly people just don't come out of their houses anymore and they don't really want to be bothered.
Do you mind saying what area you are in? When I've traveled the roads through the 'burbs of Phoenix I hardly ever see anyone outside their house, walking on the sidewalks or even riding bikes in certain areas. It's like a ghost town driving through. I'm speaking of Gilbert which I drove through to get to Cosmo Dog/Water Park in Gilbert by the 202. Most suburbs are like that, though.
I still think it's modern life. And to a certain extent the impersonal West. Being from there I was used to it. but now that I live in the SE I feel the difference.
I do think it's possible you've gotten into an area with some real snobs or fearful people. I've lived in some snobby areas myself. But mostly people just don't come out of their houses anymore and they don't really want to be bothered.
No, not snobs and not fearful, it’s a sedate modest neighbourhood next to a park and walking trails in Ahwatukee . I think part weather, part walled in homes and the “ I can’t be bothered “ attitude. I’ve lived in enough neighbourhoods in other states, or visit family in a neighbourhood i know well in Ohio to know it doesn’t boil down to just modern life, although there have been nuanced shifts after the pandemic. Some places are just friendlier and we unfortunately found a lovely home in an unfriendly neighbourhood.
As for ghost towns around Phoenix burbs, yes, although the parks are getting packed with parties, sporting events, and festivals.
Yep, that time of year! I miss Phoenix and Arizona so much. I still have yet to catch the dock dogs and their trainers at Cosmo Park in Gilbert. Probably never will, since I moved away.
That's too bad about your neighborhood. In my experience, Phoenix and its surroundings are generally like that, like California. I like living in a small town where every month they have some kind of down home festival or other. It's small, it's kind of hokey, but people are so relaxed and friendly, with most people knowing most other people. Will never see that in a big suburb or city. They ain't Brooklyn with the (historical) stoops.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I miss Phoenix and Arizona so much. 
I still have yet to catch the dock dogs and their trainers at Cosmo Park in Gilbert. Probably never will, since I moved away.
