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Yesterday I held the door for this white man and he said "Xie Xie" (Chinese for thank you) and then when I had no response and no reaction, he said "Arigato" (Japanese)
Now I don't speak either language, I was aware of those greetings as many people who don't speak the language do, as others understand "Bonjour" etc. But just because I was Asian, he ASSUMED that I spoke the language. I am Chinese-American but that does not necessarily mean I speak Chinese or any other languages, just based on my race.
THEN, when I had no reaction again, he said "Are you Filipino"?!
I said "No I am not and you have been wrong!"
This is almost an opposite situation from the recent run ins I've had where I felt race was a trigger for encounters with rude strangers, in that this man "meant well" but "Thanks" would've sufficed, this is California 2018 after all. But the assumption about language ability and THEN ethnicity (with multiple failed attempts) just screamed ignorance.
It's not cute that just because you know 1 greeting in language X you use it on someone who you THINK comes from that country X.
Oh and this is not the 1st time something like this has happened
Sounds like the guy was just being courteous and friendly. Why the offense?
Once again ... if you run around with a chip on your shoulder all the time, you'll be miserable. Just lighten up.
He sounds like one of these people who is so proud of the fact he's traveled to other countries and studied other languages, and he has to rub it in everyone's face that he speaks other languages. Men in particular seem to love traveling to Asian countries and some white males seem almost obsessed with Asian countries and Asians. Asking a total stranger what their race is, is rude, especially when he had not been introduced to you.
Yes, it's presumptuous & makes you roll the eyes, that's for sure.
Yes, we are again on the same page. "Asking race" is just rude.
Why can’t you simply say “I’m sorry, I only speak English� You seem to be looking for a reason to find racism.
This right here. Based not just on this post but on the OP's posting history. Chip on his shoulder, with racism being used to justify it. That attitude occurs in people of EVERY race, sadly.
People can assume whatever they want based on their life experience. People can be wrong. I do not really understand why OP created such a ridiculous post.
If you are Asian race than there is a good chance you speak one of Asian languages. What is wrong with that assumption?
Say "I do not understand" (which is false statement) or "you are welcome" (polite) or "I do not speak this language, I speak English only" (if you are pissed off). End of story.
You can make an educated guess based on the name. I have a couple of Japanese friends named Bill and Glenn. Yeah, English is their milk tongue, though their grandparents spoke Japanese. I have another friend named Noriko. English is definitely a second language for her.
I have a temp roomie who is Nez Perce. He still retains his native language, though English is his day to day language. He finds most Sahopkin dialects to be more or less intelligible. He doesn't mind talking about his tribe.
This right here. Based not just on this post but on the OP's posting history. Chip on his shoulder, with racism being used to justify it.
In this particular incident, I did not say there was RACISM or malice. Ignorance, yes. So get it straight and stay in your lane instead of downplaying one's experiences, likening it to "chip on shoulder" "racism..to justify"
The main issue was that people should not make assumptions, that looks are deceiving.
Attempt to "call out" all you want with your tendency to try to bring up previous "posting history" yes that is your style.
So bringing up the encounter I previously had with a cpl random RUDE older white ladies who I believe YES race triggered THEIR rude behavior, likely hits home for you because perhaps you see YOURSELF in them (in more ways than you believe)
I think the ones who take offense at this are the ones who are not proud (or maybe ashamed) of their heritage/ancestors. And so would rather not be associated with it.
I am minority in color, race and religion. However if anybody tried to speak in a language judging from my skin color I will be happy that the person is trying.
I would take these kind of persons any day over people who want US to have only one language i.e. English.
Thank you, Arigato, Merci, Xie Xie, they all mean the same thing and it is courteous of the man to try to show you how much he appreciated you. The white guy was trying to be especially nice to you in his own way. It could have just as well been an Asian American that would say Chinese or Japanese to you thinking you were a fellow countryman. In my book you are just being too sensitive. It is not gracious of you to be a grouch about it. Let it wash off your back.
I think the ones who take offense at this are the ones who are not proud (or maybe ashamed) of their heritage/ancestors. And so would rather not be associated with it.
I am minority in color, race and religion.
In my case, it is utterly not true. And I'm kinda slighted that was even suggested.
I am very proud of my Asian heritage, I feel I should not even have to bring up personal examples but I took tons of Asian-American cultural studies in college always wanting to learn more...always make an effort for regular trips to Asia (I've been all over) and when I visit other cities outside Asia I always want to visit Asian enclaves if they exist...my social circle is a healthy mix of racial demographics
I wish I had the ability to converse in Asian languages and in my case it has NEVER crossed my mind to be a different race. I don't know where you are, but I am GLAD I grew up in the San Gabriel Valley instead of Malibu. Keep in mind I am 3rd generation California-Chinese so my experience is probably different from yours, or from a 1st gen Asian-American who settled in Middle America.
I am also a minority in sexual orientation, so that adds an additional dimension
Jesus, 22 pages just for a guy saying thank you in a different language and was curious about someone's ethnic background, can't believe this thread is still going
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