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This is why I don't post anything positive about my kids any more:
Quote:
Originally Posted by maciesmom
And this has to do with purchasing your son a car how? You keep telling us this....Your son is brilliant and has high aspirations - great. Many of our children do and many children (besides yours) are bright and driven. Some even do this with jobs or paying for their own things. That different things work for different families is a given. It is starting to sound though (to me anyway) that your attitude is that while working or paying for things (at least partially) on their own, is fine for "some" kids (ie "lesser" or "less fortunate" kids, YOUR kids are above that because of their high aspirations. My kids have long term goals thank you. And they are expected to pay for some things themselves.
Oh, and for the record. My dad was a Naval officer and I grew up among many many Naval officers, some of whom attended the academy and several of my friends growing up and several of the people I work with attended service academies. It is special and it is an honor but it is not the end all and doesn't make one "better" or "above" others with different aspirations.
ETA - there is nothing wrong with just saying for your family, you believe your kid's main job is to do well in school and participate in outside activities and you believe in providing a car to help with that. No problem. What is getting me isn't that, it is the need to continually tell us just how "special" your son is and list his accomplishments....and then follow it up with something that sounds like - "well, now that we'ver heard from all the parent's of underacheivers, let's hear from the parents of kids like mine who have REAL goals....? Anyone?"
Thanks for bringing that up...IIRC that was in response to the fact that you had more or less posted a list of your son's accomplishments on two different threads that had nothing to do with the accomplishments but rather other things. One of those posts even then included the phrase that you'd like to hear from other parents who had "high aspirations" for their kids (even though plenty of other parents had already posted). So yes, IMO, unless your parenting decision was different in that circumstance (a job or a car if I recall) simply because your son was brilliant, a potential Plebe, and a member of 4 sports teams, it really had nothing to do with anything. Be proud of your kids. You should be - we all should be. A lot of how it comes across though is context. Honestly our parenting seems to be quite similar.
ETA - I am sorry (and believe I apologized earlier) that that post was snippy. It was hastily typed in irritation. And I am truly sorry it still bothers you many months later.
Last edited by maciesmom; 11-03-2010 at 09:02 AM..
Scroll down the threads and almost all of them are negative on this forum...why is this? Why does CD draw such angry people, always trying to paint children in such a negative way?
Probably because no-body here has any emotional investment in the awesome things each other's kids do.
This is a good additional place to find advice for a problem or think something out - but hands up who cares about the fun, cool stuff the kids do? I brag to family and friends about that.
I don't think it is just this forum... I think people need to vent. Let's face it we need more help with what's going wrong rather than right. I know I tend to forget to be as thankful for the good stuff as I am displeased about the bad stuff. Maybe complaining is a habit too. I don't know what the answer is beyond remembering to thankful and expressing it.
I dunno... while it's nice when you agree with someone, and you can say "yes ____ you are correct and a fabulous parent, just like myself" it's much more fun (for me anyway) to have a place to vent all your self righteous indignation at ideas you totally disagree with and say "what in the bejesus are you thinking _____, why that is the most ridiculous, inane and preposterous thing I've ever had the misfortune to read, blah blah blah".
It is cool, though, when you may actually have the pleasure of truly helping someone out.
Then there are a couple of posters whose ideas on parenting are so damaging to their children, and they are so clearly several sandwiches short, that to give them positive feedback IMO only encourages their delusions. I have no problem being negative in those circumstances.
The way I see it as that we live in a troubled world with troubled people and troubled kids. A lot of people who post are just looking for answers because they`ve tried everything else and are frustrated with their situation. As one would be...But this is real life. We don`t live in a "Disneyland" world but in a world that is full of problems.
Thanks for bringing that up...IIRC that was in response to the fact that you had more or less posted a list of your son's accomplishments on two different threads that had nothing to do with the accomplishments but rather other things. One of those posts even then included the phrase that you'd like to hear from other parents who had "high aspirations" for their kids (even though plenty of other parents had already posted). So yes, IMO, unless your parenting decision was different in that circumstance (a job or a car if I recall) simply because your son was brilliant, a potential Plebe, and a member of 4 sports teams, it really had nothing to do with anything. Be proud of your kids. You should be - we all should be. A lot of how it comes across though is context. Honestly our parenting seems to be quite similar.
ETA - I am sorry (and believe I apologized earlier) that that post was snippy. It was hastily typed in irritation. And I am truly sorry it still bothers you many months later.
Your apology is accepted but it is the reason I post nothing positive about my kids any more.
Your apology is accepted but it is the reason I post nothing positive about my kids any more.
If you want to post something postive then post something positive. If something one person said months ago upsets you so much you don't want to participate anymore then you are giving one person you don't even know too much power over you.
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