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I think the point of some posters here was that while you look down on your friends having several children by age 26, others will look down on you for being 26 and not yet done with your degree. I think it's great, by the way, that you are getting it -- I think you will have more career options. I think it was only pointed out due to the level of disdain shown towards others who you thought were not as goal-oriented as you. By sneering at them, you risk others saying well, wait a minute, you're 26 and you're only now getting around to getting the BA/BS? While simultaneously bemoaning the lack of work ethic or educational goals of those around you? (and yes, I know there are many, many reasons why one isn't able to go straight through and finish up in the traditional four-year post high school track. Just like there are many reasons women have children at different ages and make different family choices.)
A lot of you keep talking about people finishing college and getting their degrees in their early 20s. This isn't what the OP is talking about. She's talking about people having children without an education.
I totally agree. People have children at a young age and make it work all the time, but can any of you honestly say that you'd encourage your kids or to start having children when they don't even have an education? Getting an education first and being stable before starting a family is just the smarter way to go.
Her original post mentioned women getting to age 21 and then suddenly wanting to "pop out" babies. She wasn't specifically making this into an educational issue, at least not at first. And since more women then men get college degrees, that alone should be evidence that plenty of women don't just decide to have kids right away at the expense of higher education (if that's part of what she believes).
No, I wouldn't encourage my children to have children until they've gone through college, but at the same time I hope that they will not feel "sad" for those who have actively made a different decision. And not everyone goes to college -- for those who have, for whatever reason, decided not to go that route, I see no reason why they shouldn't have children in their 20s if they feel stable enough to manage it. Those are the women who may actually benefit from having kids younger, and perhaps the responsibilities of having a family will provide them with a stronger sense of direction than they had at an earlier age.
I think the point of some posters here was that while you look down on your friends having several children by age 26, others will look down on you for being 26 and not yet done with your degree. I think it's great, by the way, that you are getting it -- I think you will have more career options. I think it was only pointed out due to the level of disdain shown towards others who you thought were not as goal-oriented as you. By sneering at them, you risk others saying well, wait a minute, you're 26 and you're only now getting around to getting the BA/BS? While simultaneously bemoaning the lack of work ethic or educational goals of those around you? (and yes, I know there are many, many reasons why one isn't able to go straight through and finish up in the traditional four-year post high school track. Just like there are many reasons women have children at different ages and make different family choices.)
People are not reading well enough. She has said a few times she already has a degree, she's getting another one
I'm completing my Bachelor's to further my education and increase my career options. BTW, I have a nursing license and completed a nursing program, so I'm really not sure how that ties into my peers being on their 3rd kid.
fail
Fiesty today LOL. You live your life and your friends "popping" out babies can live theirs.
I'm 26 and I've noticed over the last couple of years (esp. recently) all of my friends seem to be getting married and girls my age are now on their 2nd and 3rd kids. I came from an upper middle class neighborhood and I feel like I'm one of the last one of my peers who isn't married or knocked up...or on my 2nd or 3rd baby.
Is this normal? I sometimes almost feel sad for girls my age. I look at their FB and in their employer section I swear it feels like all of them have "Stay at home mommy" and a picture of a new sonogram with their umpteenth baby on the way. Considering that the majority of their husbands don't even have a college degree (and neither do they) I wonder how they do it. I feel like the odd ball out and wonder if I'm going to regret waiting so long to have kids.
I'm with a wonderful guy, but we're finishing college and I told him even though I would love a baby, I'm trying to think logically and at least get our degrees and loans out of the way. My peers seem SO relaxed and not worried at all, which makes me feel like I worry about finances too much, but I just felt like I was being responsible.
Most of them work at Rite-Aid or are married to husbands that work as supervisors at a pizza restaurant or are in the military. I guess I can't wrap my head around it. I have this weird feeling that once girls hit the age of 21 their minds go into baby-mode. I remember working at a sales job at Bloomingdales in the mall and I worked in the baby area (partly). The girls I worked with would sigh and say stuff like "I can't wait until I don't work and can be a stay at home mommy"....and others would see other women shopping with their babies during the day and say "I wish I was a housewife and had a baby already".
I really don't envy women who are stay at home moms, because I like to make money and the vast majority of them don't seem to have husbands who are engineers, doctors, lawyers, etc. so I honestly don't know how they have a savings account or more than enough money to really feel content. Am I going through a crisis? Is it just normal for girls my age to be going nuts and popping out babies like crazy? Everyone keeps asking me when I'm going to get married and have babies. Because my guy and I want to go to graduate school it probably won't be until 30, but then I wonder if I'll feel like I have less energy in my 30s to raise kids and look back and say "Wow, I wish I would have just toughed it out and had kids young".
I don't know anyone who is a stay at home mom. At all.
I think the point of some posters here was that while you look down on your friends having several children by age 26, others will look down on you for being 26 and not yet done with your degree. I think it's great, by the way, that you are getting it -- I think you will have more career options. I think it was only pointed out due to the level of disdain shown towards others who you thought were not as goal-oriented as you. By sneering at them, you risk others saying well, wait a minute, you're 26 and you're only now getting around to getting the BA/BS? While simultaneously bemoaning the lack of work ethic or educational goals of those around you? (and yes, I know there are many, many reasons why one isn't able to go straight through and finish up in the traditional four-year post high school track. Just like there are many reasons women have children at different ages and make different family choices.)
*sigh* I've finished my nursing degree and my nursing license. I decided to transfer my credits and complete a Bachelor's in Economics.
I don't think that a degree is the only way to go. I do know people without one that went way further in life than most everyone I know, but they are not as common. I guess I was just wondering how these people could be working at 7-11 and Pizza Hut and purposely trying to get pregnant or having kids, then consistently turning around to ask me why I'm not married or why I don't have kids. I didn't grow up in the ghetto/hood where this is expected--and yes, it is expected. My Mom came from the ghetto/hood and I've spent time in them and I've always seen this mentality coming from uneducated and ignorant people. I'm not saying that to be mean. I think I agree with the post of entitlement. Maybe that is why it's happening so much.
And yes---it IS sad when someone could have done something with their life but they put themselves in a position where they were stuck with all the babies they had. HOWEVER--let me mention that there are also REAL go-getters that have 1-3 babies and they are such hardworkers and hustlers--with tons of energy--that it didn't hold them back. THey weren't looking for their pregnancy as a ticket to sit around at home. I respect that women like that. They like to stay at home and let themselves go and gossip about what's on TV and what is happening in the neighborhood. That's their choice. There are some SAHMs that are totally the opposite and there are some really awesome working/career Mom's out there, but I don't agree with people acting like I'M the one that's not normal for actually trying to educate myself and go further in life when I'm only 26 (actually 25 going on 26--but whatever).
You guys can beat the degree thing with a stick if you want. I completed my nursing program and earned my nursing license and now I want more. I decided this at 24 (midway) and I'm continuing my education. I'll also be graduating with this Bachelor's when I'm 26. I'm working full-time, saving, and helping my guy complete his education at NYU because he has helped me. We support each other and don't get it twisted--we would like kids--we just don't want to purposefully put ourselves in a position where we know that we don't feel financially ready.
Also--to note. A lot of girls I knew were also in college and talking about how they were going to be lawyers, etc. A large majority of them quit halfway and had babies (planned pregnancies) and stayed home. I've just always thought it was like taking the easy way out. Again--if it makes them happy OK. I don't hate SAHMs, but I do get sick to death of people bothering me about getting married and popping out babies like all of us women are supposed to be baby factories. I'm not attracted to the SAHM lifestyle. Maybe one day I will be, but definitely not now.
If anything, I wonder if people are actually jealous of me because they push the whole baby and marriage thing so much and look at me funny when I say "No, I want to complete my education and at least have a down payment for a house..etc." I practically feel like they are pressuring me to be a f*** up like they were.
People are not reading well enough. She has said a few times she already has a degree, she's getting another one
Right? Thanks for realizing this lucky.
I wasn't trying to make it a pissing contest. If people want to purposely pop out babies at 18-25 without a college degree or job...or a job at McDonalds, I could care less. I feel disgusted with the ones that use the system, but if they like not working and don't want to go to school that's ok. I'm just tired of being beaten with the stick about me being married and having babies. I just feel like "Already? I'm only 25 (going on 26)? Did I miss something???".
I just feel like I've hardly started to have fun with my life. I don't intend on pushing it and if I did feel financially stable I would have a kiddo TOMORROW lol, but I don't. My maternal clock has been ticking for a while, I think, but I just have a lot of self control and have killed myself with being responsible and telling Mother Nature to shut up lol.
Yes. I walked in off the street and just bought my nursing license. No degree needed. Forgot that's how it works.
Maybe some of you DO need to go back to college. Wow. I'm not one to tell people they MUST go to college, but I don't think it would hurt a few of you. Scary.
Yes. I walked in off the street and just bought my nursing license. No degree needed. Forgot that's how it works.
Maybe some of you DO need to go back to college. Wow. I'm not one to tell people they MUST go to college, but I don't think it would hurt a few of you. Scary.
LOL! I was just about to say...How do you think she got a license
Anyways on a lighter note Happy Independence Day everybody!!! time to watch some fireworks...
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Right? Thanks for realizing this lucky.
No degree needed.
Forgot that's how it works.