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Our children see what we do and they themselves have the free will to decide if they approve of it or not. For instance, my parents only listened to country and disco music. They absolutely forbid me to listen to rock. Now did i have the power to decide to give in and learn to like country and disco? yes. Did i? No, i faked the funk when i was home and when i left the house to go to school or a friend's house i pulled out my walkman and tuned to a rock station. Years later did i learn to like and accept other types of music? yes i did but it had nothing to do with what my parents ok'd or forbade.
Its the same with everything else. We can tell our kids how we feel about things even if it sounds dumb or makes no sense to the kid(s) but its up to them to decide if they want to emulate us or not.
Without reading the other 11 pages or so, my concern is about an 8 year old boy and an 8 year old girl playing a game of dress up where they expose their underwear and whatever to each other. That is where he got the interest right? These doesn't seem like a healthy game on so many levels.
I doubt 8 yo kids care if each other sees their underwear or nude.
As the mother of a boy ~ it seems that they must conform to a very narrow role set forth by society.
It's fine for a girl to dress like a boy (jeans, pants, shirts) but the opposite is far from true.
I remember my son - when he was about 3 or 4 ` saw a pair of sparkly red shoes at the store. He wanted those shoes so bad and could not understand why he could not have red sparkly shoes. Did that mean he was gay? He!! no. He saw something bright and sparkly. But I was so afraid of what others would say that I did not let him have them. Sometimes I wish I would have bought him the damn shoes.
At age 8, I would be having a conversation with my son about the gender roles defined for us by society. Yes, you can step outside those roles if you desire, but you will face some unpleasantness from other people, kids and adults, if you do.
I feel sorry that we can't allow little boys to explore different things the way we allow little girls ~ especially when it comes to dressing.
I said no to an awful lot of things my kids wanted to do when they were young. I didn't even have to explain myself.
As far as the OP goes, no I wouldn't let my 8 year old boy wear girly socks or underwear. As teens I couldn't stop them from doing whatever they darned well wanted to do and it did involve some girls clothing, but not in a crossdressing way...just in an ugly fashion way. They don't do that anymore though.
I remember my son was about 8 when he got his first pair of glasses. He walked into the store and spotted some sports goggles and insisted that's what he wanted. He nearly made a scene but stopped himself. We laughed about that yesterday when we got him another pair of glasses (he is 21 now) and he said he would have been beat up in school if I had actually let him wear those. I said he probably could have pulled it off because he was so cocky and sure of himself. LOL
I will say this, as a Mom of three young men, one who is gay. He "came out" when he was 21. When he was 5, he used to dress up in my clothes all the time, my other sons never did that. He insisted on wearing a frilly apron when he helped out in the kitchen, again, my other sons would not have been caught dead in that apron. I never even wore it. He loved to play with his little sister, they played dolls, and Barbies, and he was always doing her hair, and playing with the "Easy Bake Oven", his brothers were out in the yard, playing GI Joe, with toy guns, or beating each other up. He completely ignored them both, even though he is in the middle of them.
So, I am just saying this...putting it out there. Not saying your son is gay. But, I knew my son was gay, years before he decided to tell me. He was completely different from his brothers. Raised the same, same parents, but totally different. He never asked for "girl" clothes, but he was very fussy with his clothes, and extremely particular. His brothers threw on jeans and a sweatshirt, they could have cared less.
I will say this, as a Mom of three young men, one who is gay. He "came out" when he was 21. When he was 5, he used to dress up in my clothes all the time, my other sons never did that. He insisted on wearing a frilly apron when he helped out in the kitchen, again, my other sons would not have been caught dead in that apron. I never even wore it. He loved to play with his little sister, they played dolls, and Barbies, and he was always doing her hair, and playing with the "Easy Bake Oven", his brothers were out in the yard, playing GI Joe, with toy guns, or beating each other up. He completely ignored them both, even though he is in the middle of them.
So, I am just saying this...putting it out there. Not saying your son is gay. But, I knew my son was gay, years before he decided to tell me. He was completely different from his brothers. Raised the same, same parents, but totally different. He never asked for "girl" clothes, but he was very fussy with his clothes, and extremely particular. His brothers threw on jeans and a sweatshirt, they could have cared less.
My friend's son, who was my daughter's playmate, was going into his mother's purse and pulling out her lipstick to put on as a toddler. He would also go into her drawer and put on her pantyhose. When he came over to play with my daughter, he wanted to wear her party dresses and dressy shoes. One time she came running to me with a bundle of fancy dresses and asked me to hide them because Matt only wanted to play "wedding" or "princess" and she was tired of having to be the groom or the prince.
His father couldn't stand it, but his mother just said, "We can never say we didn't see this coming. There will be no closet for him to come out of."
I severed the relationship with the friend about ten years ago. Her son must be about 18 now. By that time he was around eight and had gotten the message that dressing that way was not appropriate for him, but I wonder how he turned out.
I will say this, accept your children for who they are. While I still don't think it is socially appropriate to encourage a boy to wear girl's clothes. That being said, when my son wanted to take Home Ec in school, not shop class, I was fine with it, he wanted to be in the school choir, and take drama classes, I was fine with it. He told us he hated basketball, that is okay.
I will say this, accept your children for who they are. While I still don't think it is socially appropriate to encourage a boy to wear girl's clothes. That being said, when my son wanted to take Home Ec in school, not shop class, I was fine with it, he wanted to be in the school choir, and take drama classes, I was fine with it. He told us he hated basketball, that is okay.
I will say this, accept your children for who they are. While I still don't think it is socially appropriate to encourage a boy to wear girl's clothes. That being said, when my son wanted to take Home Ec in school, not shop class, I was fine with it, he wanted to be in the school choir, and take drama classes, I was fine with it. He told us he hated basketball, that is okay.
Just enjoy your son, and appreciate his quirks.
OK, so how does this story end? Is he now in the NFL or is he auditioning for Glee?
OK, so how does this story end? Is he now in the NFL or is he auditioning for Glee?
I understand what you're asking, and not to be too serious, but the two aren't mutually exclusive. Your question is answered earlier in the thread, a few posts up.
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