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I consider my stepfather my father. My real dad I lived with for 16 years and then moved in with my mother/step father. My stepfather has been in my life since I was 6 years old, and my dad died when I was 20. So yeah, he is my father now too. He always was, but I just never called him "dad".
My son will call him grandpa and he loves my son just like a grandpa would.
My step-dad treats my sisters and me as his own. However, he doesn't have any kids of his own. Also, he didn't come into the picture until I was a senior in high school and my sisters adults.
Yes a step-parent can. My husband is the step-father to my 2 oldest children, in their eyes and his eyes he is their Dad. Their biological Dad is not in the picture by his choice so it did make it much easier for my husband to assume the role as their Dad.
me personally? even though she is not my stepdaughter as im not married to her mother, i do live with her full time (more than my own 2 daughters) and no, its not the same. I do have love FOR her, and i care about her. but its nothing like the bond i have with my 2 girls.
I dont even see that changing when we DO get married. It is how it is. but i show her respect and care and thats more than enough for someone in my role in her life, even though she has no father
Yes, they can but it takes a special person. I am actually closer to my ex-step-mother and her new husband than my father. He is not my bio dad. I was adopted by him when he married my mom. I think he used that adoption to his advantage. Look at me what a great guy I am, I adopted a child that was not my own. I have not spoken to him for 14 years. He met my son once when he was 9 months old. I was very upset with him when he divorced my step-mom. He has been married 4x now.
If I have questions about marriage, child rearing, I ask my step-mom or my MIL. I trust their opinion more than my bio-mom.
Family is what you make it not whose blood you share. I am so thankful to have my step-mom in my life. I was NOT an easy child, very mean to her when I lived with her, my dad and step- brother. She stuck by me, believed in me. I have told her all this, she is well aware how grateful I am to have her in my life.
I have a g/f (friends for 35+ years) that definitely treats her step-son differently than her own children. He hasn't been the easiest child. I usually don't offer unsolicited advice to my friends but one time she asked me if I thought she treated her step-son differently. I told her what I thought and felt. It didn't change anything, but she asked and I was honest!
Yes, definitely. I know plenty of people who consider step-children their own children, and I also know some children/adults with deadbeat "real" parents who are very close to their step parents. It doesn't always happen, but it's definitely not the exception.
Blood does not make family. Technically people are not blood related to their spouses (hopefully), but that doesn't stop them from loving each other.
I think it is easier if the stepkids are either grown or do not live with the step parents. Also, if the new stepparent does not have children of their own.
I do think it is entirely possible for step parents to love their step children a lot, like other family members but parents know that the love you have for YOUR children is frequently unique.
I say this having had more than my fair share of stepmoms and having been a stepparent myself.
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