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A couple of posters have mentioned that those that have been married before see prenups in a different light: both my husband and I have "been around the marriage block" and we both feel the same - if you need to negociate the divorce settlement before getting married, you shouldn't marry that person.
We both have wills, drawn up together, that have allocated what the children get. "Problem" solved.
IMO, you don't need a prenup if you have nothing to lose, or you have so much that you don't care if you will lose half.
Protecting your assets to support your minor children, or to protect a family business (esp. if other family members would be harmed) that could be destroyed by a vindictive spouse if a divorce occurs, are valid reasons for a prenup.
Like sunshine, I don't have a prenup, but we did discuss it and my then-SO-now-wife was totally supportive of having one if I wanted one (she had no assets to speak of). However, I have enough that she would be welcome to half of any post-marriage gains (my retirement funds pre-marriage are off-limits by law where I live, so they're not an issue) if we did split up. Plus, our kids from prior marriages are adults, and we think they can take care of themselves. There are few complications that would make a prenup useful in our situation, but if things were much different, there would definitely have been one.
You are supposed to have an undying trust, for better or worse. Going into a marriage with a prenuptial agreement is really saying "I dont buy into the for better or worse till death do us part". People say "Well you just protect yourself with a prenup".. You shouldnt be marrying that person in the first place then!
You may be able to trust your spouse implicitly, but what about his/her creditors and/or family?
If the spouse and I ever make it legal (), we will have an agreement. We're in our early 50s; I own property, IRAs, 401K accounts, etc., and he does not. He does not covet my property or retirement money (which I will happily share with him when the time comes), and is well-provided for in the event of my premature demise.
However, if there should be any reason for us to split up, I don't trust his family, who has advised him poorly in the past.
I've always thought that pre-nups were primarily for the super wealthy with previously established poor marriage track records (e.g. Donald Trump/Liz Taylor types). But from reading this thread, it sounds like a lot of ordinary people in the USA are either drawing up prenups or indicating they will when they marry (!?) I don't know ANYONE that did a prenup prior to getting married. Is it seriously that common in the USA?
I work with some very wealthy people and none of them have a pre-nup, nor have I ever personally known anyone with one. I don't think they are common at all in the US, except among rich movie star types.
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It is extremely common in the US, mostly for second marriages. I know many couples my age who have one. Its really not a big deal...it is an asset protection for one spouse who brings in far more than the other. Many of us have experienced just how unjust division of assets can be in a divorce situation.
For those who dont want one..great. For those of us who do..great. It is a very personal decision between two people who want to marry.
I don't either, but it's not like something that people are likely to talk about. It's a private matter.
Sounds like it is talked about according to FlightAttendant, as she (he?) knows many couples with one. I've had a number of close friends get married over the last 10 years (in Canada) and it would have been a topic of discussion for sure. Perhaps it has to do with divorce laws? Are they not fair in the USA? In Canada when you divorce, anything accumulated during the marriage is split (both assets and debts) but anything brought into the marriage is retained by the person who brought it in - in other words, the Heather Mills situation would NEVER have happened in Canada. Would she have succeeded in her greed in the USA like that as well??
In Canada when you divorce, anything accumulated during the marriage is split (both assets and debts) but anything brought into the marriage is retained by the person who brought it in - in other words, the Heather Mills situation would NEVER have happened in Canada. Would she have succeeded in her greed in the USA like that as well??
It's the same in the US. Many men view splitting the asets accumulated during the marriage as "taking them to the cleaners".
It's the same in the US. Many men view splitting the assets accumulated during the marriage as "taking them to the cleaners".
It may vary from case to case. Imagine a guy who made six figures compared to his wife who barely made 30,000. No children, both working outside of home, etc. Then comes divorce and she gets half? He made the big purchases and she still gets half of it? both making similar amounts of money, making big purchases equally, etc. different story.
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), we will have an agreement. We're in our early 50s; I own property, IRAs, 401K accounts, etc., and he does not. He does not covet my property or retirement money (which I will happily share with him when the time comes), and is well-provided for in the event of my premature demise.
