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I've read all the post on city data about dating in New York. I've read all the magazine as well as city data articles and books about how easy it is for men and hard it is for women to date in New York. How there are suppose to be so many women that most men do want to just be with one woman -though these articles never say if most of these surplus of women are attractive or not-.
But my question is for the women of New York regarding women in the 25-32 age range. Are women in that age group interested in long-term relationships? I'm from the midwest and the whole hookup, one night stand, and casual dating/friends with benefits isn't something I'm interested in. I'm about to graduate college and I'm looking to attend medical school in New York. While researching New York dating, I ran across this article Dear Single Women of NYC: It's Not Them, It's You. - Page 1 - News - New York - Village Voice
It's long so you don't have to read it. It's basically a woman giving another side to the reason a lot of women in New York are single. She is saying that because of all the options women have, they tend to not stay in relationships long, because they are always looking for someone better. I myself I'm handsome -at least I consider myself handsome, I do have a picture of myself on my city data profile-, I eat healthy, I workout, I'm funny, kind, sincere, and even though I'm not 6 feet tall, I'm still about average height 5'9.
But from reading this article I get the feeling that all this doesn't matter when compared to model handsome, playboy rich, 6 feet plus tall New York guys who are literally just around the corner.
I'm talking about attractive women not plain or average looking, over weight woman, straw stick too thin women.
Last edited by qwy; 12-03-2011 at 06:47 AM..
Reason: spelling mistake
I've read all the post on city data about dating in New York city. I've read all the magazine as well as city data articles and books about how easy it is for men and hard it is for women to date in New York city. How there are suppose to be so many women that most men do want to just be with one woman -though these articles never state if this surplus of women are attractive or not-.
But my question is for the ladies of New York city regarding women in the 25-32 age range. Are women in that age group interested in long-term relationships? I'm from the midwest and the whole hookup, one night stand, and casual dating/friends with benefits isn't something I'm interested in. I'm about to graduate college and I'm looking to attend medical school in New York city. While researching New York city dating, I ran across this article Dear Single Women of NYC: It's Not Them, It's You. - Page 1 - News - New York - Village Voice
It's long so you don't have to read it. It's basically a woman giving another side to the reason a lot of women in New York city are single. She is saying that because of all the options women have, they tend to not stay in relationships long, they are always looking for someone better and the more attractive she is, the more this mentality is the case. I'm handsome -at least I consider myself handsome, I do have a picture of myself on my city data profile-, I eat healthy, I workout, I'm funny, kind, sincere, I'm studing to be a neuro or brain surgeon, and even though I'm not 6 feet tall, I'm still about average height 5'9.
But from reading this article I get the feeling that all this doesn't matter when compared to model handsome, playboy rich, 6 feet plus tall New York city (especially manhattan) guys who are literally just around the corner.
I'm talking about attractive women by the way, not plain or average looking, over weight or spaghetti string too thin women. I'm not saying this to offend anyone, I'm saying it because the article stated that the more attractive a woman is the more she like this. And attractive women are what I'm after
Last edited by qwy; 12-03-2011 at 07:15 AM..
Reason: additional information
I'm not a woman in New York but I was a single guy while living there. I've also read that article. NYC's a BIG place and there are many different types of people there. That article, I think, was targeted at the young middle-class professional women with Sex in the City fantasies. There are a lot of those types runing around up there, no doubt, but there are also many more down to earth women who aren't always looking for the next big thing career or relationship wise.
I enjoyed living there. There are plenty of gorgeous women everywhere and I like the fact that they tend to be a lot more aggressive than in other places. I'm no male model but I never lacked for attention up there. I also LOVED the variety of women(ethnicities, nationalities, whatever).
good article. I probably fall into the "boring and uninspiring" category (tho not a "bad choice" per se as the article suggests) but i just don't care anymore anyway
It's not that complicated and it all goes back to women being competitive with other women.
Let's take a group of female friends. Some are single and some are not. Lets say the ones who are not single have boyfriends who work in low to mid paying jobs. Sometime soon thereafter, one of the single girlfriends starts to date a dude who works in finance, big law, or media and is well compensated. This girl soon starts to talk about how she's gong to nice restaurants, vacations, upscale parties, etc. Not only that, but then she begins to talk about how her boyfriend has the potential to make 250 or 500k in due time and how her boyfriend is doing 'big things' in his life. Now let's say that this girl isn't that much better looking than her friends.
What do you think starts to happen with the girls who have 'loser' boyfriends? They start to resent them. They start to question why they're with a loser when they could just as well be in a relationship with a winner. Have you ever known somebody who kind of fell in to a good job or career? What are your thoughts? The truth is that you begin to resent them a little because you know that they're not truly deserving of it (whatever "truly deserving" may mean).
Nobody wants to get stuck with a loser in NYC when there are so many 'winners' so they just constantly chase. Why? Because they see girls who are with winners who are not that much better than them and in many cases may be worse.
This in turn triggers a reaction from the "losers" because it is all too obvious what many women are chasing in this city. The reaction is one of apathy and "assholishness" towards women. The irony is that the "winners" are already as*****s by nature towards women because they know that they're a 'worthwhile catch'.
In the end, all men are as*****s and all women complain about them being as*****s. lol
Last edited by wawaweewa; 12-03-2011 at 10:02 AM..
are "losers" considered types like myself who maintain steady work, live independently but are not very ambitious and don't make much $$, may be considered "boring/ininspired"?
because if the dreaded NY City answer is "yes", why bother being married?
i mean i have heard the term "loser" hurled even at successful ambitious men but are abusive in some major way
so i assume if a man is successful, ambitious, earns a lot but NOT abusive then compared to myself I am a "loser"?
jeez, what a way to live, if this is how people live by evaluating you, why bother dating or marrying?
Believe it or not, the dude is right about women chasing that they perceive is better.
You know why....because women are generally shallow here.
If you want to come here for med school, finding a women is the last thing that should be on your mind. You'll accidentally find one but never focus on finding a women especially if you're going to go to med school.
what about people who work but don't make a ton and are close with their immediate family? I can't see how that would be objectionable unless the person was a terrible person.
I've read all the post on city data about dating in New York. I've read all the magazine as well as city data articles and books about how easy it is for men and hard it is for women to date in New York. How there are suppose to be so many women that most men do want to just be with one woman -though these articles never say if most of these surplus of women are attractive or not-.
But my question is for the women of New York regarding women in the 25-32 age range. Are women in that age group interested in long-term relationships? I'm from the midwest and the whole hookup, one night stand, and casual dating/friends with benefits isn't something I'm interested in. I'm about to graduate college and I'm looking to attend medical school in New York. While researching New York dating, I ran across this article Dear Single Women of NYC: It's Not Them, It's You. - Page 1 - News - New York - Village Voice
I am a transplant from the south and I can honestly say I share some of the same concerns as you do.
I have no problem saying that NYC has some of the most beautiful and intelligent women I have ever met. If you are looking for a casual date each week, a friend with benefits, or someone to just hang out with than NYC IS DEFINITELY THE PLACE FOR YOU.
BUT, if you are looking for a Long Term Relationship and/or marriage you are **** out of luck here. Women here are extremely picky and if you are not a certain height, weight, drive a certain car, and/or make a certain income than you will have a hard time finding the attractive woman that you seek. Even then many don't really know what they want.
I find that many NYC women feel the man should do ALL of the pursuing and work in the relationship. They want to be chased and treated like queens, but most won't even bother to smile or even make eye contact on the streets. It's as if more women want to be , in their late 30's and 40's, and still dating.
From my personal experiences with dating and just meeting women here in the city, I can say that out of every 10 women I meet, 6 out of 10 are in or seeking a "friends with benefits" situation, 2 out of 10 are just getting out of a relationship and are still dealing with exes, and 2 out of 10 are "truly single" and may or may not be looking for a relationship.
I don't know about you but FWB is not the life for me. It is just frustrating to see so many good looking women who really could care less about finding love.
Maybe I am just old fashioned??? Just my humble opinion.
Last edited by usamathman; 12-03-2011 at 10:27 AM..
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Single Women of NYC: It's Not Them, It's You.
Dating and the NYC women
