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My wife is a very jealous person by nature, she over analizes everything. My best friend is a female been there for each other since around the 6th grade. Never more than friends but wife didnt like it she said its not about trust its about avoiding others thinking shes a fool after seeing my friend and i having lunch or whatever else people can come up with . So to keep the peace we just catch up on the phone and she occasionally stops by our home to visit. I truthfully feel like life long friends of opposite sex shouldnt have to pick between their friendship and relationship but once married you shouldnt really be spending enough time with anyone of opposite sex to have those heart to heart talks wirh someone new that build a close best friend relationship with the opposite sex.
But what this really comes down to is, respect. If a person respects his partner, he's not going to make his girl feel insecure by hanging out with female 'friends'
So my occasionally hanging out with female friends means I don't respect my wife?
some people are blinded by 'trust' abide by it to the extent they are being shafted by the S.O. Ridiculous. I would never trust somebody to the point where I'm watered down by it. You don't know what he's doing with his female friends when they are out together (or in). I don't care what he tells the woman and then she tells herself in an effort to beleive it.
Hmm.... so, my wife is able to have opposite sex relationships because she is "not that attractive"?.. Thank you, i shall go and replace her immediately.
It has nothing to do with attractiveness (unless your as shallow as a spoon) it has to do with being freinds. You don't choose the sex of friends based on chromosomes. If your fortunate enough to have the opportunity to make a friend or keep one you shouldn't make your choices based on weather or not they're the 'wrong' sex.
Seriously some peoples mindset is mind boggling..As if any man or women has such low self control that they could not possibly want to bang every semi attractive person they come in contact with or are friendly with..
If you dotn think your spouse can handle being around an attractive person without wanting to f him or her it might be time to leave the relationship if you have such little trust in that person..
My wife is a very jealous person by nature, she over analizes everything. My best friend is a female been there for each other since around the 6th grade. Never more than friends but wife didnt like it she said its not about trust its about avoiding others thinking shes a fool after seeing my friend and i having lunch or whatever else people can come up with . So to keep the peace we just catch up on the phone and she occasionally stops by our home to visit. I truthfully feel like life long friends of opposite sex shouldnt have to pick between their friendship and relationship but once married you shouldnt really be spending enough time with anyone of opposite sex to have those heart to heart talks wirh someone new that build a close best friend relationship with the opposite sex.
Honestly, that's one of the saddest things I've ever read. Your wife drove a wedge in your lifelong friendship for the sake of keeping up appearances. That's, quite frankly, monstrous.
If getting married means I have to give up meaningful conversations with my male buddies, I think I'll pass.
Honestly, that's one of the saddest things I've ever read. Your wife drove a wedge in your lifelong friendship for the sake of keeping up appearances. That's, quite frankly, monstrous.
If getting married means I have to give up meaningful conversations with my male buddies, I think I'll pass.
Getting married doesn't mean that, please don't blame "marriage". Just don't marry a small minded, insecure woman and you'll be fine!
I wouldn't have a problem if my gf had some guy friends to hang out with, but she doesn't. If she did, I might be "suspect" of the guys intentions. That's only because my gf is "hot". Sorry if I sound "arrogant" or "cocky", but that's the truth. And being a guy myself, I would know what "most of them" would really want. Having said that, I admit, I am a bit of a hypocrite myself. Because I don't believe "all" guys would honestly want just one thing from her, but I would think "most" surely would.
I say this, because I have this friend who is a girl, and we've been friends since around 1991. Or, a little over twenty years. She's ten years older than I am. I am almost forty. She's pretty "hot", and I don't use that phrase much (I am very picky). But, although her face is hot, I never have looked at her as my type. A bit too skinny. Almost scrawny, and I'm not huge myself. Plus, she goes more for black guys than white guys. Which means nothing to me, but I am white. I've never been into her, and I don't think that she has ever been into me. But I think in the past, she had a crush on me. But once again, I really can't be sure. I hate to assume, so I'll say we both wanted nothing sexual from each other. We used to keep in touch alot, but we haven't that much over the last few years. Even when I lived 3000 miles away, we would still talk on the phone at least once a week. My only problem with her (as a friend-and I'd have the same problem if it were a guy) is she talks my head off. My god that girl can talk. We'd have an ongoing joke about when it was time to get off the phone. I would say, gee Missy (whoops-gave up her name), my house is on fire, I gotta go. She would just laugh. She knew I was teasing, but also knew that I was tired of talking. Sometimes I would say, my kid just ate a frog. Stupid things like that. My kid doesn't even live with me all the time, and she knows this, so she would just laugh.
I have had problems in the past with being friends with girls. Many would have boyfriends, then suddenly out of the blue, they would tell me that they think about me alot. Friendships over! So, it works both ways. Women will try the friend approach to try to get with you and so won't men. So, depending on what the guy looked like, I guess to be completely honest, I would have some reservations about my gf having a "close" guy friend. Especially since she doesn't now and hasn't since we met. So, yes I would be at the least, be a bit skeptical. I guess I would just have to trust her. If she's going to cheat, me telling her that she can't have some guy as a friend wouldn't alter that plan. Plus, I would never tell her who she could or couldn't hang out with. I'm not her boss. I might not like it, but I would just have to trust her and suck it up. She didn't like my friend Missy when they first met, and we first started dating. I had to reassure her over and over that she is not my type. That we've been friends for over twenty years that if something was going to happen, it would have already. She doesn't mind Missy at all now. Now their friends too. But she feels like me, boy that girl can talk! lol
Last edited by supermanpansy; 06-05-2012 at 12:32 PM..
I wouldn't have a problem if my gf had some guy friends to hang out with, but she doesn't. If she did, I might be "suspect" of the guys intention. That's only because my gf is "hot". Sorry if I sound "arrogant" or "cocky", but that's the truth. And being a guy myself, I would know what "most of them" would really want. Having said that, I admit, I am a bit of a hypocrite myself. Because I don't believe "all" guys would honestly want just one thing from her, but I would think "most" would.
I say this, because I have this friend who is a girl, and we've been friends since around 1991. Or, a little over twenty years. She's ten years older than I am. I am almost forty. She's pretty "hot", and I don't use that phrase much (I am very picky). But, although her face is hot, I never have looked at her as my type. A bit too skinny. Almost scrawny, and I'm not huge myself. Plus, she goes more for black guys than white guys. Which means nothing to me, but I am white. I've never been into her, and I don't think that she has ever been into me. But I think in the past, she had a crush on me. But once again, I really can't be sure. I hate to assume, so I'll say we both wanted nothing sexual from each other. We used to keep in touch alot, but we haven't that much over the last few years. Even when I lived 3000 miles away, we would still talk on the phone at least once a week. My only problem with her (as a friend-and I'd have the same problem if it were a guy) is she talks my head off. My god that girl can talk. We'd have an ongoing joke about when it was time to get off the phone. I would say, gee Missy (whoops-gave up her name), my house is on fire, I gotta go. She would just laugh. She knew I was teasing, but also knew that I was tired of talking. Sometimes I would say, my kid just ate a frog. Stupid things like that. My kid doesn't even live with me all the time, and she knows this, so she would just laugh.
I have had problems in the past with being friends with girls. Many would have boyfriends, then suddenly out of the blue, they would tell me that they think about me alot. Friendships over! So, it works both ways. Women will try the friend approach to try to get with you and so won't men. So, depending on what the guy looked like, I guess to be completely honest, I would have some reservations about my gf having a "close" guy friend. Especially since she doesn't now and hasn't since we met. So, yes I would be at the least, a bit skeptical. I guess I would just have to trust her. If she's going to cheat, me telling her that she can't have some guy as a friend wouldn't alter that. Plus, I would never tell her who she could or couldn't hang out with. I'm not her boss. I might not like it, but I would just have to trust her and suck it up. She didn't like my friend Missy when they first met. I had to reassure her over and over that she is not my type. That we've been friends for over twenty years that if something was going to happen, it would have already. She doesn't mind Missy at all now. Now their friends too. But she feels like me, boy that girl can talk! lol
Exactly. I said I don't like it. He can choose to keep hanging out with friends and find another person who is high err...on some higher level. LOL
We just happen to be on the same page. Which seems to make us both monsters. LOL
Good grief.
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