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You could have taken that inheritance, bought a sports car, taken a bunch of elaborate vacations, and spent the rest in clubs and restaurants. It's not luck that you chose to manage the money that landed in your lap wisely.
True. But the person in question could have taken that cash, and invested it 50/50 in an S&P 500 index fund and a European equity index fund, in October 2007. Even if he/she had the fortitude to make to trades or panic-moves, how would he/she have done? Or, the very same activity - OK, maybe just the S&P part - could have taken place in March of 2009. The difference is luck.
The price for being at a logistical disadvantage, is having to make more accommodation.
Unfortunately this view is becoming all too common, even if both potential partners are financially secure and have made excellent progress in life. While of course I respect your opinion and your choices, in the large I regret the prevalence of such views in society. The more that individuals rely on networks of friends, to supplant romantic partners, the lower the selection for potential partnerships.
Another rarity, when we agree. There are of course times when shared-housing bespeaks immaturity, poor life-decisions, lack of planning and the like. But let's not let appearances fool us. Many owners of fine houses are mired in debt. Many denizens of contemptible hovels are substantially wealthy.
Sad reality in LA, for sure, if you didn't get in within the last 15 yrs or so, you're toast unless you're pulling down 6 figures and the old lady is pulling down near there too.
We bought back in the late 90's, a condo and for what I thought was fortune at the time, but looking back it's a pittance comparatively speaking. Our mortgage with HOA and property taxes is still cheaper than the rent at apartment complex down the street from us.
Sad, I think things are going to be changing in the next several yrs, the American dream isn't as attainable as it once was. People shouldn't have to be spending 48 to 50 percent of their money on housing, just not a good place to be financially, whether they own or rent, it's tough out there.
IDK... people are still paying it though, I guess the desire to live in So Cal must mean something, as we get flyers in the mail from local real estate agents asking if we want to sell as they've got buyer and we're in a desirable building. Some where someone's got the greenbacks to be buying as the market is starting to make a comeback, at least here it is.
Is walking around with one's schl____ hanging out more important than financial goals?
I'm a whitey, but was once married to an API and I do think that the poster has a point, though. Not at all uncommon for men and women who are Asian to live at home (if there's room) or to live in housing owned by family if they're single. Or, hell, even if they're married.
It's a cultural thing, I reckon.
Obs on my road.
Couple 30somethings living with parents. The parents are respectively Taiwanese and Overseas Chinese from Mauritius. 30something #1 is a woman well into her 30s, north of 35. Apparently engaged. 30something #2 is a man, early 30s, who didn't have the scholastic ability to do Finance / Eng / etc, as we know, not everyone wins the lottery in being a braniac. Both struggled like many Millennials due to the Crash of 2008 - underemployed for a few years out of school. In the case of the woman, she probably could afford to be like Biff and Buffy and have her own place, but since it's culturally OK to not do that, and to, instead, build up the old financial warchest, well then ... there you go!
Yeah, I did acknowledge somewhere in this thread that I get that other cultures do things differenet. I just took a little umbrage at the white people comment and how he was clearly sort of mocking about it, but whatever, I'm not really upset, just irked that I can't as a white guy make blank statements like that. LOL..
Imagine me as a white guy saying something like......... "Black folks, my god, you guys got X" fill in the blank with whatever ignorant comment you want.
I wasn't mocking you or anyone.
Just simply pointing out that the mainstream white culture has this thing about pounding on one's chest about demonstrating independence. Do you deny that this exists?
I cannot deny it.
It did it and regret it actually.
I wish I knew my place, back when I was in my 20s and early 30s.
I should have been more humble and less obsessed about demonstrating my independence.
It seems like the general consensus here (with the exception of a few women) that roommates are okay (depend on where in the country you live)... the "scarlet letter" the OP speaks of is more for men living with their parents (and even that seems to have exceptions such as for men taking care of an elderly parent, etc). The derision is primarily saved for those lazy guys who mooch off their parents as long as they can. And let's face it, no one admires them... men or women.
I don't think the "red letter" is as bad as some men think. I really think men are harder on themselves when it comes to these things than women are. Men just think they know what women are thinking/judging when, in a lot of cases, they are projecting. It's just like those guys who are obsessed with their looks because they think all women are into looks when in reality they are the ones with a hangup on their looks... or those guys obsessed with their money because they think all women look at their wallets when in reality they have a hang up with money... this is just another facet of the same thing.
And I doubt it's an enormous percentage of this already tiny tiny percentage that are in "hovels". Do you think 50% or more of people making $700K/year live in hovels, realistically?
Even though lets say the parents live close and have a nice big house and are cool parents who give you your privacy?
And as your parents get older you're there to help them just like they helped you as you grew older and they give you their house i.e mortgage free while helping around the house, do the lawn, snow shoveling in winters,
The satisfaction of not being in debt while being there for your folks as they grow older.
Self Respecting?
Durn it! No self respectin' 'murican 'ud be a momma's boy, still livin' in thuh nest! Git out and conquer the frontier! .... oh ... wait ... frontier, what frontier!
When I was in my 20's I had a buddy that we lived together and it was fun at the time. We had a large 2 bedroom and 2 bathrooms so it worked out that we each had our own setup, I definitely don't like the idea of sharing a bathroom with another guy, but that's probably just me.
I think maybe we're seeing some generational differences here in our POV's. I think younger people like early 20's are just doing thing much differently then say the Gen X crowd does/did. Once I see that show up in a thread I adjust my perceptions accordingly and realize that were dealing with things from different angles.
Millies are characterized as a Civic Generation whereas X are a Nomad Generation. Interestingly, though, some of the current Xer financial woes owe to the combination of having Boomers as our "older brother / sister" role models (which told us "seek and ye shall find") and meanwhile our Nomad nature (from growing up during a time when children were generally neglected) made us hesitant to trust. We craved independence early and this actually slowed our acquisition of assets as we p___d away money on rent during our 20s. Millies watched us struggle and those of us who do mentor them counsel better financial habits, learned from our own school of hard knocks. Also, in general, Millies are more collectivistic than Xers. A lot of that has to do with how schooling and parenting was done during the 80s and 90s.
I don't disagree with you about having preferences and standards. However, the message that seems to be conveyed on this thread is that roommates = you're a broke loser. That's just not true IME. Some people like having roommates simply for the fact that they have company and someone to talk to. Some people do it to save a little money up or invest, like me. Some people like having a roommate because it makes living in a particularly high demand area possible, like my GF. There are valid reasons for people choosing to have a roommate. It does not make one a loser, so let's stop painting it as such just because it's not one's own preference.
Exactly ... hmmm .... let's see .... in-the-hole "creatively financed" rugged individualist vs rent seeking live-in landlord ... hmmm ....
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