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Thanks. I'm just not a fan of assumptions or judgments, especially about things like this. Get to know somebody, hear their story. I mean, I just think if I'd dismissed people with knee-jerk judgments going through life, how many bright souls I would have missed out on connection with. People with brilliant minds, or deep wisdom or creative power. I've got no interest in fencing myself into a tiny place and sitting there sneering and snarling at everyone.
Tell ya one thing. The adult male virgins I've known, are probably the least apt in my opinion, to make me feel like my boundaries are being pushed uncomfortably. It's the guy who feels entitled to move on any woman he wants, that I want to avoid. Not the one who assumes that we're just friends (and that's ok!) and I'm not interested, until I clearly tell him that I am.
But then the adult male virgins I've known also have not projected bitterness and anger toward women. Even the one I knew who was in his mid 50's, had a real zen approach to life.
Guess what I'm saying is that they have been different...maybe socially awkward, or having unusual perspectives...but nothing that made me feel threatened. People should try not to judge too harshly when they don't know someone.
That of course is harder in a discussion forum, as we'll likely never meet and all we have to go by, is what someone shares on the screen.
I agree.
I really don't like it when assumptions are made on person's mental health, especially on something as silly as being a virgin. People like to throw words like repressed, underdeveloped, dysfunctional, etc. They also love to try to convince people like this that they are only fooling themselves if they seem very happy otherwise. When it comes to abnormal psychology, I was taught about the four D's in terms of determining whether someone MAY have an issue: Deviance, dysfunctional, distressed, and dangerous.
Yes people like this are "deviant," and some may say dysfunctional because they assume they can't maintain a relationship or there's some cognitive dysfunction that causes them to not be interested in romantic connection. However, that is NOT the case for everyone. At the absolute most they may be deviant, and that is nowhere near enough criteria that there is something wrong with that person.
I can understand if they'e constantly complaining, blaming others, and making it everyone else's problem. However, if they aren't hurting anyone, making it a big deal, and they're happy otherwise, is there really problem?
I can understand if they'e constantly complaining, blaming others, and making it everyone else's problem. However, if they aren't hurting anyone and they're happy otherwise, is there really problem?
I don't think so.
*shrugs*
The struggling virgin dudes who post here almost always fit the first description. They are the desperate, disturbing ones.
In the second, you have a whole different category: men with complete self-awareness who are just not interested in pursuing sex or relationships and have accepted it as their way of life. They are not posting about it because they are content with their situation.
The struggling virgin dudes who post here almost always fit the first description. They are the desperate, disturbing ones.
In the second, you have a whole different category: men with complete self-awareness who are just not interested in pursuing sex or relationships and have accepted it as their way of life. They are not posting about it because they are content with their situation.
And I completely agree with you.
However, I know a few people IRL, that like to make the strugglers the spokespersons for that entire demographic. That's what I was talking about.
The struggling virgin dudes who post here almost always fit the first description. They are the desperate, disturbing ones.
In the second, you have a whole different category: men with complete self-awareness who are just not interested in pursuing sex or relationships and have accepted it as their way of life. They are not posting about it because they are content with their situation.
I thought about this, though...
It might be the venue. Like I said, in a forum, all we've got is what's posted, right? Well, sometimes when I'm in a funk about something, I might confide in an internet friend, or my Mom, but I would not show that to my in person friends, or my partner, because I don't want them to think I'm a downer right? The face we show in different places might not always be the same.
And even a person who is generally pretty functional and is dealing ok with the hand they've been dealt, might be moody or feel despair at times. So maybe they blow off that steam, HERE, but they don't do it in the rest of their lives where there are people they actually care about?
I dunno, there are very few posters I find outright insufferable, and it's not those ones. It's the ones who deliberately derail threads, rile people up just to start a ruckus, or are hateful or mean. Sure, some people will beat the same drum for years and years about their issues and never take any advice to fix 'em. Venting, that's all. OK. I can just stop responding if that gets tiresome from them.
I just wonder, I think there's a good chance that they're very different if you sat down face to face and talked to them.
Funny, how I can think of a few people I've known, that I got to know in person and nearly fell in love with, because they were SO COOL and then I friended them on social media, and started seeing that every post they made was just...awful. Like, stupid or crazy or melodramatic to the point I couldn't even take it. And I thought, "Man, how is this person so fantastic face to face, but here they're so horrible??" It happens.
However, I know a few people IRL, that like to make the strugglers the spokespersons for that entire demographic. That's what I was talking about.
Yeah. And the fact that you have one or two guys posting under dozens of different names doesn't help either.
This is a PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT. The number of male virgins over the age of 25-30 is vanishingly small. They are not a revolutionary army capable of overthrowing social norms and coercing women to have pity sex with them! It's not gonna happen guy (s)
Yeah. And the fact that you have one or two guys posting under dozens of different names doesn't help either.
This is a PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT. The number of male virgins over the age of 25-30 is vanishingly small. They are not a revolutionary army capable of overthrowing social norms and coercing women to have pity sex with them! It's not gonna happen guy (s)
And just in time for Valentine's day: 17 dead in Florida high school massacre.
They say he was an "odd" boy.
I do happen to know that since he's still alive, he may be able to get internet access at a state hospital if he goes that route.
Well, if all women reacted like you to adult male virgins, then why would you be surprised that they are still virgins. In most cases they are virgins because you pretended that they never existed to begin with. Dig?
What an odd thing to say. I would suggest that yesterdays tragedy isnt really all that funny.
Who said it was funny? Are you starting to hear voices? I'm feeling like it's right on topic. One in the forest may not be able to see the trees, though.
Who said it was funny? Are you starting to hear voices? I'm feeling like it's right on topic. One in the forest may not be able to see the trees, though.
I understood what you were getting at and it's the same reason I often feel the need to bring some people teetering on the Red Pill edge back to reality.
Because if not the consequences can be scary. They HAVE been deadly, in the past, on a few occasions. I don't think there's info on this particular tragedy yet. However, I get what you were saying, and I think a lot of us here do and I believe that's why we post here in the first place. For that percentage that COULD get help instead of swallowing extremism views, and then hate building until it's dangerous.
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I'm just not a fan of assumptions or judgments, especially about things like this. Get to know somebody, hear their story. I mean, I just think if I'd dismissed people with knee-jerk judgments going through life, how many bright souls I would have missed out on connection with. People with brilliant minds, or deep wisdom or creative power. I've got no interest in fencing myself into a tiny place and sitting there sneering and snarling at everyone. 
