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There is a whole lot of real estate between "my way or the highway" and "whatever you say".
SO and I have no shared accounts either. Even so, my house stayed my house, but became our home. His property is his property, but is currently our home.
Is that his complaint? That he doesn't co-own the house?
That is one of his biggest complaints. He says it does not benefit him to pay towards a house he does not own. He wants to have a house as part of his investments, but did learn a lesson when I had a rental that was trashed be a renter.
At first he was fine and didn’t make everything an issue. Now he does.
That is one of his biggest complaints. He says it does not benefit him to pay towards a house he does not own. He wants to have a house as part of his investments, but did learn a lesson when I had a rental that was trashed be a renter.
At first he was fine and didn’t make everything an issue. Now he does.
How much is he expected to pay? It's perfectly reasonable for him to pay the going rate for renting a room, plus his fair share of utilities/groceries. However, it's not reasonable for him to pay more than that.
Powerless is a word he has used. What does he want power over? Not really anything to “power”. He also always says everyone is disrespecting him. He fails to give examples. Everything is a disrespect in his eyes. And not just us, cashiers and servers are also usually his complaints
He always wants to discipline the kids. He was raised in a very strict house. I would say abusive and have told him anything he learned from his parents should be forgotten because they were terrible.
I am a parent that likes to talk about situations as they come up and don’t punish them for everything. He thinks punishment is the only way to learn. I completely disagree. My kids are both very good so I would say I have done something right and my way is working. No need to alter it
He disciplines your kids???????????? You must be joking.
Ok. I'm out. This is clear insanity on your part. Allowing basically a stranger to do this is outrageous!
Those poor kids! They need serious counseling because of situations YOU have put them in.
How much is he expected to pay? It's perfectly reasonable for him to pay the going rate for renting a room, plus his fair share of utilities/groceries. However, it's not reasonable for him to pay more than that.
Have you sold the townhouse?
He is supposed to pay $800 a month which includes all utilities. Which works out to be a little less than 25% of my monthly bills including the mortgage, and utilities. Or some months the same as him paying the electric bill. He also took over one garage and the small building.
He is supposed to pay $800 a month which includes all utilities. Which works out to be a little less than 25% of my monthly bills including the mortgage, and utilities. Or some months the same as him paying the electric bill. He also took over one garage and the small building.
It doesn't matter what percentage it is of your bills; it only matters if it is the going rate in your area. If you went on Craig's List and looked at rooms for rent in the area, what sort of prices would you see? If $800 including utilities is ballpark, then that's fine. If it's high or low, then it should be adjusted.
Quote:
Originally Posted by LowonLuck
Yes I sold it December of 2016.
Cool. (It's not germane to the current topic, I just wondered).
It doesn't matter what percentage it is of your bills; it only matters if it is the going rate in your area. If you went on Craig's List and looked at rooms for rent in the area, what sort of prices would you see? If $800 including utilities is ballpark, then that's fine. If it's high or low, then it should be adjusted.
Cool. (It's not germane to the current topic, I just wondered).
It sort of does matter. He pays less than his portion to live here. I have a super cheap mortgage for the area and size house we live in.
It is about right for room rental but he also is using a garage and building. He paid $550 for a really bad apartment. He started paying that but then we had a fight about him paying more to eat out and I explained that the electric bill was more than $550 a month for half the year
It sort of does matter. He pays less than his portion to live here. I have a super cheap mortgage for the area and size house we live in.
No, it doesn't. When you go to rent a house or apartment, the rent is based on the going rate for the area. No one shows you a list of expenses then informs you they are now your responsibility. No owner ever says "Good news, I have paid off my mortgage, so of course I am passing that savings on to you!" No prospective tenant ever tells him/herself "Well, other places like this one rent for $1,000 per month. But this owner has a HUGE mortgage at a high rate, so my rent will be $2,000 per month. OK, that's fair."
Don't confuse the issue based on your own financial decisions. What is a fair price to rent a room in a house in the country in your area? Whatever that amount is, that is what he should be paying. Even though he is sharing your room rather than renting one down the hall, room rental in a private home is the closest equivalent.
Quote:
Originally Posted by LowonLuck
It is about right for room rental but he also is using a garage and building. He paid $550 for a really bad apartment. He started paying that but then we had a fight about him paying more to eat out and I explained that the electric bill was more than $550 a month for half the year
Again, don't confuse the issue. Using a garage and a building is a standard privilege when one rents a room in a house in the country. What he paid for a crummy apartment is not relevant. What you two spend when you go out to eat is not relevant. [You pay for yours (and kiddos) and he can pay for his. There, problem solved.]
Look at the Craig's List ads. What are the typical food and utilities arrangements?
Lots of people who are complete strangers to each other manage to work out fair arrangements whereby they can share a home. Two people who plan on marrying each other ought to be able to do the same.
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