Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I’ve never dated someone with kids but my friends have and said it wasn’t fun.wondering what people have experienced.why they wouldn’t mind it or why they would have a problem with it
Well when I was single I wouldn't want to date a woman who had kids and didn't want more, because I knew I wanted kids. You also have to remember that someone with kids will likely have an ex who is in the picture, and you will probably have to deal with at some point as well. If that ex is bringing a lot of drama to the situation you might not want to deal with it.
When l found myself single again after 20yrs of marriage, l had one cast iron rule about anyone new and kids. One child and no more , or none at all.
Starting over later 40s, there was enough to deal with.No way on earth l was gonna be dealing with a tribe of kids and ex's and in laws and then their gk's later and marriages and families and on and on it would go. l don't think people realize just how the big picture will be later on - and that will go on forever and actually grow if anything, soooooo, no thanks.
My partner only had one son and he was living 1200k away with his own life, perfect. But even he has had 2 kids since we met and now he has marriage problems and l just thank the Gods she didn't have more kids.
lf l'm ever single again l'll be changing my rule to NO kids.
I’ve never dated someone with kids but my friends have and said it wasn’t fun.wondering what people have experienced.why they wouldn’t mind it or why they would have a problem with it
I would only date someone with kids if the other parent is complete out of the picture. You're not just dating them they aren't separate. You're dating them, their kids their ex and their ex's parents.
I dated a man that had a daughter for a few weeks years ago. He chose to break it off. You come in third in that sort of relationship, sometimes forth or fifth.
Location: Huntersville/Charlotte, NC and Washington, DC
26,700 posts, read 41,758,476 times
Reputation: 41381
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hankrigby
I would only date someone with kids if the other parent is complete out of the picture. You're not just dating them they aren't separate. You're dating them, their kids their ex and their ex's parents.
I dated a man that had a daughter for a few weeks years ago. He chose to break it off. You come in third in that sort of relationship, sometimes forth or fifth.
I’m the opposite. If I dated someone with kids, I would want the natural father in the picture. That would be a good sign since the woman would show she is able to maintain a cordial relationship to put her kids interests first. Also, if they have split custody, it frees up her time more often for me. It also takes the pressure off of me so I can be a bonus father figure rather than a replacement dad.
It wouldn't particularly bother me as long as the kids were well cared for and well behaved. I'm not so much interested in putting up with bratty entitled demanding children, but probably most aren't that spoiled. Kids tend to be normal kids.
I’ve never dated someone with kids but my friends have and said it wasn’t fun.wondering what people have experienced.why they wouldn’t mind it or why they would have a problem with it
There are too many factors that play into a given dating situation to objectively say that I would or wouldn't date a person who has children.
If you're someone who pretty much always needs to be the top level priority in your partner's life, dating someone with kids might not be for you. If you don't mind sharing the spotlight with kids, work, and sometimes the other parent of the kids, dating someone with kids wouldn't be a deal-breaker.
That being said, dating someone who has children can be both challenging and rewarding and, in some cases, nightmarish depending upon the child, parenting styles, and the relationship between the person who you're dating and the other parent of their child(ren).
Last edited by Formerly Known As Twenty; 08-25-2022 at 08:27 PM..
I’m the opposite. If I dated someone with kids, I would want the natural father in the picture. That would be a good sign since the woman would show she is able to maintain a cordial relationship to put her kids interests first. Also, if they have split custody, it frees up her time more often for me. It also takes the pressure off of me so I can be a bonus father figure rather than a replacement dad.
As I said I dated a guy for a few weeks years ago that had a daughter. I am also a guy. He was really nice he was an attentive father the daughter I only met once and she was five at the time. I ran into him a few years later and he explained to me that his ex who had parents who were his daughter's grand parents they were ultra religious and if they knew they would have influenced her and he might not have ever gotten to see her again. He stayed single until she was an adult.
Remember it's not all about the person you are dating. There are exes, ex in-laws and lots of powers that control the person you are dating. I wouldn't X it out completely, but I have to be at least the second property in the person's life.
It sucks, as harsh as that is. Spontaneity goes out the window. You're 22 and you wanna have fun, you don't want to be with someone that's got those levels of commitments, life is short, have fun, save the adult stuff for later.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
